Lost Love
by AlySimmons
Summary: After the second war, Athrun and Cagalli went towards their separate ways but there was one thing left to remind them of their relationship-a child. Will 'happily ever after' be their future? Or will their love for each other remain lost?
1. Prologue

**I don't exactly know what might happen in this story but I did kind of already had the plot set up but still...**

**Anyway, this is my first ever multi-chapter fic and I really hope you guys will love it.**

**And I don't own Gundam Seed/Destiny...bummer...**

**Lost Love**

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Prologue

Cagalli didn't know how long she waited, how long she paced back and forth on the marble floor of her bathroom.

Five years? No, maybe five decades or was it five scores? For all she knew she waited for five centuries or maybe even five millenniums.

She was scared. No, saying she was scared was an understatement. She was shocked and frightened beyond belief.

She might be wrong, though. It had only been a theory-a hypothesis but her period was thirteen days late and it had never been late before. At least not late by that many days.

Not only that, she had started vomiting as well.

She could have started hyperventilating- nobody would've noticed.

She however could not afford to faint right now. Her future was there, on that stick. How pathetic.

She couldn't afford, though, a doctor's appointment for even if she bribed and paid them to be silent, she could not assure herself that this incident would be. Someone could find out. And that's the last thing she wanted.

She never told anyone- not yet anyway. But she knew she would have to soon, especially if this turned out to be positive. Kisaka would probably be the first one to know and Myrna as well. She knew she could trust her brother and Lacus but going all the way to PLANT would be troublesome. Aunt Caridad could be told of the situation. She knew her birth mother's sister wouldn't rat her out.

Telling her closest and most trusted friends wouldn't be a problem. And though she knew she can trust _him_, she doubted that she'd be able to tell him. How ironic that the one man she could not muster enough courage to tell of the situation would be the father, of all people.

He had stayed in PLANT. She's already known that fact long before it happened. After all, they had broken up the night before the Archangel launched. Officially, she meant.

And that's when he took her innocence away- the only thing she's still innocent in. She didn't regret it though. She loved him. No, loves him. And that night, however sad, was something she could never forget. She gave him her everything.

She knew that she'd always choose her country over him. That was no question.

More than two million people over one man?

It was terribly unfair.

But she loves him too much too. Even for just one night, she'd be able to do that. For one night, she could give herself to him, and only him.

Her country's not on her head or any council meetings or any wars that would take place in the near future even.

That night, she was his and his alone. And she's willing to do that for she loves him.

And yet, no matter how much she loves him, she still couldn't tell him if what she feared for was true.

It could be an unwanted pregnancy, she did not know.

She had always wanted to carry his child. She could still remember during those two years of peace when she and he would sit down, hold hands and look into the future.

They would embrace and make a solemn promise to each other that they would stay with each other no matter what happens and protect one another.

But right now, looking at the situation, those promises they made were all null and void.

How pitiful.

She sat down on one of the chairs. Everything…everything they worked so hard for, for their relationship…all gone because of what she had done. She never even imagined that he'd be able to forgive her. She hadn't even forgiven herself after all this time.

She couldn't help but dart her eyes towards the clock every second. Any moment now, she would see the result.

And that stick would tell of her future, whether or not she will be a mother, whether or not the press will have a field day, whether or not she will have yet another scandal as chief representative and whether or not she might have to keep something from her friends and from _him_.

She stood up in what seemed to be millions of years.

Her breath hitched and her head hurt.

She felt dizzy. _No, no, not yet_, she thought, _not until-not until I've seen the result._

She closed her eyes for a second. She took hold of the plastic stick that could tell her fate.

Again, how pathetic.

She took one look and her breathing quickened.

_No, that can't be right._

She rubbed her eyes and looked again.

_No, no, no._

She held the stick in her trembling hands.

_Oh, God, no, no._

It's positive.

_How could this be?_

She's pregnant.

_There was no way that…_

But there it was, proudly contradicting what her mind was telling her- the stupid pregnancy test.

_It couldn't be._

But it's true.

_I'm having a child._

And not just any child, _his_ child.

_I'm pregnant with his baby._

_His baby, and no one else's._

Cagalli didn't know whether to cry in fear or in happiness. She was having a baby…his baby.

And it doesn't matter whether she'll tell him or not, whether he'll stay or not.

And it doesn't matter anyway whether or not it was his baby. True, she's glad it was his baby she was carrying but no matter whose it is, it was still hers.

And she'll protect it, because the child is hers.

All this time she had been thinking about what might happen to her. But right now, now that she realized that a life was born into her, she couldn't care less.

She's having a child and she'll have it, not just because it's his but because it's _hers_. And no baby of hers will be teased or made fun of. Her baby won't be the center of the world's attention, at least not yet. Her baby won't be depressed and sad and be made to carry that much responsibility at a young age like she was. No, she'll take care of it and protect it at all costs.

Because it was her baby and the rest, right now, matters not

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**Please review and I sincerely hope you guys loved it.**


	2. Chapter 1

**Lost Love**

**Chapter 1

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**

**2 years later**

"Yes, I understand." Cagalli told Representative Kobayashi. "Let me assure you that we will be able to settle this situation by tomorrow. So, I advise that you stay put and not do any unnecessary things. The paperwork will be sent to you as early as sunset."

"But chief representative," he started. "Adviser Lionel is a very impatient man and he demanded that…"

"Representative Kobayashi," Cagalli sighed. "I did _not_ send you there to look as if you are deterred by their impatience and demands. The king of Scandinavia is the ruler of the country and not Adviser Lionel. And you are of the same rank as an adviser of Scandinavia. So I suggest that you trust me, alright? Furthermore, Missus Erica Simmons will be accompanying you and she is already on her way."

And the line went dead.

Cagalli massaged the bridge of her nose and leaned back on her chair, not minding the amused expression of Ledonir Kisaka.

"Are you really certain that Representative Kobayashi can trust your word on that?" he asked.

"Kisaka, you know full well I never go back on my word." Cagalli glared at her former bodyguard. "That treaty's not even due for another week. Adviser Lionel's kidding himself and Kobayashi was coward enough to take his word over mine."

"Don't say that," Kisaka crossed his arms. "I heard Lionel's a hard man to work with after all."

"Whatever," Cagalli rolled her eyes. "Now, why are you here?"

Kisaka grinned. "Someone called for you."

"Let me guess," Cagalli clasped her hands. "Someone by the name of Carina Ashlyn?"

"Do I need to say more?"

"I swear, I've got no idea how, at one year and ten months, she knows how to use a phone." Cagalli sighed.

"Well, considering she's a coordinator and taking note as well that her father's a celebrated mobile suit pilot, war hero, too good of a technician and her mother's the famed chief representative of the Orb Union and a war hero as well…well, you do the math." Kisaka said.

"Yeah, I already did." Cagalli agreed. "Don't worry, I'll call her later."

"Hi, Sweetie," Cagalli said after she heard her daughter pick up from the other line. "Uncle Kisaka said you called. Is there any problem?"

"Ooh," Carina's voice chimed in. "Mommy, I made a paper crane! Grandma Caridad taught me how!"

"Oh, really?" Cagalli's voice changed to a softer tone. "Are you going to let Mommy see it?"

"Yes!" Carina giggled. "Ooh…a butterfly!"

Cagalli smiled to herself at the thought of Carina running around in her sundress. "Carina, dear? Would you get Grandma Caridad for me?"

"Grandma!" Carina called and soon, Cagalli heard an older lady's voice instead.

"Hi, Aunt Caridad," Cagalli said. "Thanks so much for doing this. Really."

"Oh, it's no big deal. She's a joy to be with," Caridad answered. "She's rather smart…imagine, a one year old child knowing how to make a paper crane!"

"Yes, she does surprise me quite a lot," Cagalli agreed. "But isn't Kira like this when he was young?"

"Well, Kira's a different kind of smart." Caridad mused. "Carina's very social and artistic, creative, imaginative…while Kira's more mathematical and scientific. He mastered trigonometry by the age of four!"

"I know," Cagalli laughed. "I have to go, though, Aunt Caridad. Thanks for babysitting her again."

"It's my pleasure and you can bring her over anytime." The older lady replied. "So you'll pick her up after work?"

"Yes," Cagalli smiled. "Thanks again, bye."

It's been two years since Cagalli gave birth to her daughter, Carina Ashlyn Athha. Only a few people knew of her existence, to be quite honest. And these few all thought that Carina was Cagalli's adopted daughter. It wasn't hard to forge a few papers, which was probably the only corrupt thing that Cagalli's ever done while being the chief representative. Kisaka and Erica Simmons helped out and Caridad and Myrna were more than understanding of her situation.

The hardest thing about keeping the pregnancy a secret was when Cagalli started showing. Kisaka was able to invent an excuse though- that Cagalli had been sick and needed to be isolated for four to five months. She lived at Caridad's place then and delivered the baby there.

So as not to seem suspicious, she let her aunt take care of her daughter for six months and then Erica was able to forge the adoption papers when Cagalli was ready to bring back the child to live with her. By then, Carina had already spoken her first word.

For Carina's safety and protection from paparazzi and media, Cagalli decided to move to a smaller house upstate (like Reverend Malchio's orphanage) with her daughter and Myrna while Kisaka often came for visits.

Since Myrna went on vacation yesterday at Cagalli's urging, Carina was now left at the care of her Grandma Caridad during the day, much to the delight of Caridad, actually.

Cagalli wasn't sure whether or not she made the right decision of keeping Carina's existence and identity a secret but for her, if it meant that her daughter will be able to live a carefree, happy and peaceful life, not haunted by her parents' past, followed everywhere by the media and everything, then she'll do everything she can, even if it meant hiding the truth from her until she's ready.

In all honesty, even Kira and Lacus didn't know about Carina. And if they didn't know, Athrun surely didn't either. That's another thing Cagalli pondered for a long while-to tell them or not. But the others had advised that maybe it would be better if Kira, Lacus and Athrun didn't know, not until the right time comes because telling them might just be as well as telling the world the truth and that might ruin everything Cagalli's worked for to protect Carina. So for now, Cagalli will have to keep the truth from them too.

Kira and Lacus visited just recently, actually. And Cagalli sent Carina and Myrna to an island the Athha family owned for a few days. (Thank God, they called before visiting.) Luckily, the married couple-yes, Kira and Lacus _are_ married, did not suspect a thing. Athrun, on the other hand did not return to Orb ever since the second war ended nor contacted Cagalli, though he still kept in touch with Kira and Lacus daily. But Cagalli still knew where he was. Of course, he's an important person up in PLANT. Lacus, now known as the chairwoman of the PLANT Supreme Council, assigned him to be the Supreme Commander of the ZAFT military while Kira was assigned to be the head of Lacus' protection squad.

Cagalli sighed.

In her mind, she still had too many questions to ask herself-too many insecurities and worries.

She wasn't a fortune teller or an oracle. She was only human who's trying to make good decisions for the betterment of the lives of her daughter and the citizens of Orb.

And for two years, she hadn't made bad decisions like forming a treaty with the Earth Alliance and declare war on PLANT and marrying a goofball. But who knows? The future isn't our ally or our enemy. But it does do some things beyond our imagination.

And as much as it's annoying, it's also exciting- to look forward whatever the future has in store for us.

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**So, I really hope you liked the chapter. Please review!**


	3. Chapter 2

**Lost Love**

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**Chapter 2**

"Mommy!" A young blond girl squealed. "Look! My paper crane!"

"My, very good," Cagalli held the pink paper crane gingerly, smiling.

"Do you like it, Mommy? Do you?" Carina's emerald eyes shone in excitement.

"Of course I do, Sweetie," Cagalli patted her daughter on the head. "But say thank you and goodbye to Grandma, we need to go home now."

"Aww," Carina pouted. "But I like it here. Do we really have to go?"

"I'm afraid so," Cagalli said. "It's getting late and Grandma needs to rest."

"Oh, alright…but I'm coming back here, right?" Carina asked.

"Yes, tomorrow. Aunt Myrna is still on vacation." Cagalli explained.

"Yay!" Carina waved her arms around as Cagalli lifted her in her arms. "Bye bye, Grandma!"

"Goodbye, Carina," Caridad pinched the little girl's cheek and Carina giggled. "Goodnight Cagalli."

"Yes, goodnight, Aunt Caridad and thank you again." Cagalli bowed her head a little.

"Don't worry about it. It's been a pleasure." Caridad kissed her niece on the cheek and whispered in her ear, "Be careful."

"I will." Cagalli said and turned around walking towards her car, carrying Carina while Caridad stood by the door and watched the pair with a smile until she could see them no longer.

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Cagalli entered her house. It was a simple one compared to her old home. It was a two floor single detached house with a porch. It was surrounded with a garden and there was a hedge at the front. Inside was like any other house. It had three bedrooms-one for Cagalli and Carina, another for Myrna and the last was a guest room, two bathrooms, a living room, a dining room and a study/ library.

After bathing and helping her into her pajamas, Cagalli tucked little Carina to sleep and gazed at her and remembered the time when she gave birth to her.

* * *

_Cagalli felt something burst within her and a pool of water gathered at her feet._

_She was just walking to get a glass of water when she felt her water broke. It was the weirdest feeling-one she couldn't describe. And she's wet, very wet. Cagalli was breathing quite unevenly._

"_Aunt Caridad! Myrna!" Cagalli yelled. "My water broke!"_

"_Come on, come on, let's get you to the bed." Myrna rushed forward. "Missus Yamato, please prepare the room."_

"_Of course."_

_As soon as Cagalli laid down on the bed, the only thing she experienced was pain. It was as if someone squeezed her tightly and yet no matter how much she's begging for them to stop, they still squeezed her, never letting go._

_Myrna noticed Cagalli's pained expression and held her hand. "It's alright, my lady. That's just a contraction…it's normal."_

"_Yes, I know. Thanks." Cagalli leaned back on the elevated bed._

"_How are you feeling, dear?" Caridad asked worriedly. "Do I need to get you anything?"_

"_I'm fine…Ow…" Cagalli felt another contraction happen inside her and panted when it stopped._

"_This might take a while and it could be painful…" Myrna told Cagalli._

"_It's alright." Cagalli said. "I've went through things more painful than this…I'll survive."_

"_I'm glad to hear that," Myrna said. "We should change you into more comfortable clothes, my lady-to prepare for the actual birth."_

"_I've got a few hospital gowns…" Caridad offered and soon, Cagalli found herself in one._

_It had been four hours since her water had broke. "You might be ready to give birth, my lady," Myrna said._

"_You'll be fine, alright, Cagalli?" Caridad squeezed her hand. "We're here for you."_

"_I know…but I can't help but feel scared. What if the baby's missing a finger or a toe or even worse, what if he has an extra toe or finger?" Cagalli said frantically._

"_Calm down, calm down," Caridad soothingly said. "The baby will be beautiful…the most gorgeous thing you'll ever see."_

"_I know but the child of a coordinator and a natural? Who knows what might happen!" _

"_Then the baby will be the first of his kind! He'll be special! There's nothing to be worried about." Myrna said._

"_You don't need to worry…Myrna's a wonderful midwife!" Caridad said._

"_Ok, my lady, I need you to push." Myrna said._

_Cagalli pushed and pushed. But nothing came out. "Push, my lady!"_

_Cagalli tried again and in what seemed like hours of pushing, Myrna finally said that she saw the head. Caridad held Cagalli's hand tightly; their arms entangled._

"_I can't-I can't push anymore…" Cagalli cried._

"_You can do it Cagalli." Caridad squeezed her hand tighter. "Just a little more."_

"_Push, push!" Cagalli repeated the mantra in her head as she pushed harder._

_And finally, Caridad whispered, "It's over. The baby's out…you can stop pushing."_

"_Oh…" Cagalli's tears fell down her cheeks. "Is-is the baby alright? No extra fingers or toes?"_

_Caridad laughed. "Yes, he's not missing any other body parts either. He's perfect like we told you."_

"_Where-where is he?" Cagalli looked around frantically. "Where's my baby?"_

"_It's ok, it's ok. Myrna's just wrapping him up." Caridad explained, combing Cagalli's disheveled hair. "You did great."_

"_She did more than just great," Myrna entered the room with a bundle in her arms. "You did excellent. And the baby's not a 'he'."_

_Cagalli looked up. "I had a girl? I had a girl!"_

_Caridad covered her mouth with a hand, her eyes getting misty. "Oh my god."_

_Myrna gave the newborn baby girl all wrapped up in a pink blanket to her mother who in turn accepted her eagerly._

"_Oh, look at her…she's beautiful!" Cagalli sobbed. "So, so beautiful."_

_Cagalli saw a little baby girl with petal lips and a tuft of bright yellow hair. When her daughter fluttered her eyes open, she saw the most gorgeous emerald green she had ever seen._

"_Do you have a name?" Caridad asked, looking at her niece's daughter in awe._

"_I've been thinking about two names…Carina and Ashlyn." Cagalli smiled. "Carina means 'beloved' and Ashlyn means 'dream'."_

"_They're both beautiful names…" Caridad mused. "Why don't you combine them?"_

"_Like Ashlyn Carina? Or Carina Ashlyn?" Myrna suggested._

"_Carina Ashlyn…" Cagalli caressed her daughter's cheek. "I love it."_

"_Welcome to the world, Carina Ashlyn."

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_

Cagalli snapped back to reality and smiled at the memory. She got up from the bed and went through her e-mails.

It was indeed late and she saw that all her mails were more paperwork except one. It was from Lacus. If it was official business then Lacus would say it was from the 'PLANT Supreme Council' but this mail was addressed to 'Cagalli' and it was from 'Lacus'.

Cagalli only knew one Lacus and it was no doubt that this was her sister-in-law. She opened the e-mail, curious.

Why in heaven's name would Lacus send an e-mail? She had just visited with Kira three weeks ago.

Cagalli started to tense. What was wrong?

She read the letter and the more she read, the wider her eyes had become.

No.

_No._

This couldn't have…_how?_

Oh, God…_no._

By the time she finished reading, Cagalli felt hot tears flowing down her cheeks.

_Lacus_

_

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_

**I hope you all liked this chapter...quite a cliffhanger, huh?**

**But I'll update very soon. To all who reviewed, thank you! I really appreciate them.**

**As always, please review.**

**P.S. For the following chapters, expect twists and turns. And asucaga fans might be a bit disappointed but don't worry, this story _will _have a happy ending.**


	4. Chapter 3

**Lost Love

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**

**Chapter 3**

_**Dearest Cagalli,**_

_**You might think that it is unusual for me to write you a letter when I have just seen and talked to you three weeks ago. But I feel that you should know what is happening here in PLANT-that is, things that are concerning Athrun. I know all too well that you both had not seen and contacted each other ever since the end of the second war. Though I have no right to say that both of you still have feelings for each other, but as your friend and sister-in-law, I feel obliged to tell you that Athrun is engaged to Ms. Hawke. I know that Ms. Hawke harbors deep feelings for Athrun but I do not know if the feeling is mutual. I'm sure you've heard as well that Athrun had become nothing but strict to his subordinates, and therefore he reveals nothing to the media, thankfully.**_

_**Hence, this engagement was not publicized. It will only be a small wedding-only family and close friends. And I'm sure that, even if you don't have feelings anymore for Athrun, you'd still be hurt to find out that he's married and you were not notified of the matter. Truth be told, I feel that Athrun doesn't want to face you for he is embarrassed and guilty. But of course, that is only my perception.**_

_**Athrun and Meyrin's engagement party will be held on the second of April of Cosmic Era year 75 in December City at the Zala Manor. I'm sure you know where it is. I was told that the whole party might last a month; I don't know the specific details. It might not be in my place to say this but I do hope you'll come as my guest, which is your choice, of course. Athrun might be livid with me when he finds out about this but being Chairwoman of PLANT, he doesn't have the right to-I guess I'm abusing my power in that way but if it'll help my closest friends to reconcile and start speaking to each other, then it's worth it.**_

_**I should've told you earlier so that you'll have time to think but writing this had been a very hard decision for me. And in all actuality, Kira doesn't even know about this letter and I fear of his reaction but never mind that.**_

_**I hope you'll take the time to think and consider my invitation.**_

_**I wish you well.**_

_**With much love,**_

_**Lacus**_

"Wow." That was the only thing Caridad could say.

Another day had passed and Cagalli decided to stay for a while at her aunt's home, wanting someone who understood to talk to. All day she had been haunted by Lacus' letter. She knew that Lacus sent it with good intentions but she couldn't help but feel the pink princess had complicated matters

True, she was hurt that Athrun's engaged. Ok, deeply and very hurt and she _did_ cry, _a lot_, but…

Whatever, maybe it was better that Athrun will marry Meyrin. She knew the girl, knew what she's capable of and knew of her feelings for Athrun and she couldn't help but think that Meyrin might be the perfect girl for him, no matter how much the thought pained her.

"What do you think should I do?" Cagalli asked. She could hear the sound of the television and Carina's giggles.

"Well, this is very hard to think about," Caridad sighed. "Why don't we understand every statement Lacus wrote? That way, it might be easier to come up with a decision."

"Alright," Cagalli agreed. "Where do we start?"

"Hm…How about the fact that Athrun and Meyrin are engaged?" Caridad suggested. "Let's start with that."

"Ok, what about Athrun and Meyrin's engagement?"

"Cagalli, I think you know the answer to that." Caridad said. "You still love him, don't you?"

"I-that's…no," Cagalli denied. "I don't love him."

"And you expect me to believe that?" Caridad arched an eyebrow.

"Ok then, what do you expect me to say? That I _do_ love him?" Cagalli sat on a chair.

"Well, admitting it wouldn't be bad…c'mon, I'm the closest you have to a mother right now," Caridad sighed. "Be honest with me."

"Ok." Cagalli said. "I do love him. But that doesn't mean that I should just fly to PLANT and steal him from Meyrin. I mean, that's just wrong."

"I know, Cagalli," Caridad touched Cagalli's hand. "But Lacus said so herself, didn't she? That Athrun might not feel the same way."

"But that _still_ doesn't mean I could just steal him away." Cagalli said.

"Going to the engagement doesn't mean you're taking him away," Caridad smiled softly. "If you're that anxious, then just go as a friend and nothing more."

"No, then that'd be too painful…I can't go through that."

"It's alright; you can make the decision later. But Cagalli, right now, are you hurt?"

"Yeah, knowing he's with another person pains me but it's my fault our relationship became strained, right? So I guess I deserve it. He's better off with Meyrin anyway."

"Cagalli…" Caridad shook her head. "You made mistakes. So what? People do that all the time. And people are given second chances. But you wouldn't allow yourself to have that kind of benefit."

"My mistake…my mistake influenced people's lives and I'm not just talking about a small group but probably the whole world! My mistake killed too many people and hurt the people I care about most-you included." Cagalli said, exasperated. "How could I even offer myself a second chance?"

"Cagalli," Caridad squeezed her niece's hand. "The only reason you made those choices during the war was because you thought that at that time, that was the best decision. Who knew it would turn out that way? You only did it because you cared. You wanted to protect. And you wanted to keep the one thing you feared most from happening. It's not your fault."

"I don't know, Aunt Caridad…" Cagalli sighed. "I just…I don't know. Ok, let's say I did give myself a second chance. I went up there and all went well. Athrun and I are back to normal. What about Carina? I can't afford to let her suffer. I can't bring myself to."

"Cagalli, you are looking into the future too much." Caridad said. "Why don't you just live? Make decisions right now because you think they are for the best. And if you realized it was a mistake, then cry, mope around, regret…but forgive yourself. That's just how life is."

"Aunt Caridad…"

"Life is all about second chances, Cagalli." Caridad caressed her cheek. "Don't forget yours."

Cagalli smiled. "Aunt Caridad…Kira's really lucky to have you as a mother."

At that, Caridad laughed. "Now if only he'll visit more often…"

"Alright, I'll go." Cagalli sighed. "Kisaka could always fill in for me…what about Carina?" Cagalli tilted her head towards her still giggling daughter at the sitting room.

"Two years should be enough," Caridad said and Cagalli understood the meaning immediately.

"Do you really think it would all work out?" Cagalli asked.

"All of you children went through too much before you even reached adulthood." Caridad said. "Every time I look at you, I see a person who's experienced in every way one could imagine and yet you're just twenty. You all suffered so much and I believe you all deserve more than _just_ a happy ending."

"You really think so?"

"I know so."

"Ok then," Cagalli dialed Lacus' number (her cellphone number and not her office number).

She heard her friend pick up. "Lacus?"

"Cagalli! Did-did you receive my message?"

"Yeah…"

"And what's your decision?"

"I'm going, Lacus, so reserve a seat for me, ok?" Cagalli tried to be cheerful.

"W-wonderful!" Lacus sounded ecstatic. "I'm sure they'll be glad…"

"Um, but Lacus?" Cagalli asked as Carina walked towards her with curious eyes and she patted the little girl's head. Cagalli looked at her Aunt who nodded encouragingly.

"Yes?"

Cagalli took a deep breath. "Do you think I could bring someone along with me?"

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**I very much hope that you all liked this chapter!**

**As always, please review. They are very much appreciated.**


	5. Chapter 3 and a half

**Lost Love **

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**Chapter 3.5**

"Alright, I'll see you then," Lacus then put the phone down. She couldn't help but feel giddy. Yes, she might have written in the message that she wanted Athrun and Cagalli to 'reconcile' but what she actually wanted was for them to get back together.

It would be bad news for Meyrin but…no matter how much Lacus looked at the situation, she couldn't see true happiness, unlike Kira and herself.

But, she would have to tell Kira someday. She had to admit, she's scared.

Yes, Lacus Clyne-Yamato was scared of Kira…when he was as livid as hell.

"Hello, Darling," Kira said as soon as he spotted Lacus in their bedroom.

"Kira!" Lacus smiled.

"How was your day?" Kira kissed Lacus on the cheek.

"Well, it was ok…paperwork and the usual…" Lacus said, a bit nervous. She'd have to tell him now.

Lacus sat on the edge of the bed. "Kira?"

"Yeah?" Kira turned around, unbuttoning his shirt. He let it fall to the floor revealing a well built chest.

Lacus gulped. Yes, she had seen him naked before but whenever _this_ happened, she'll always blush.

Kira looked at his wife curiously, a bit amused of her blushing face. He had nothing on but a pair of boxers while Lacus already had her nightgown on. He smiled and pounced on Lacus, effectively straddling her. "What is it you wanted to tell me?"

"I invited Cagalli to the engagement," Lacus took a deep breath.

"What?" Kira immediately stood up from his earlier position. "Why would you do that?"

"Well, Athrun and Cagalli hadn't seen or spoken to each other for two years," Lacus played with her fingers. "And I thought that they could reconcile during the engagement."

"Ok, reconcile, I understand," Kira said. "But it didn't have to be during Athrun's engagement party! Lacus, you don't have an ulterior motive, do you?"

"No, of course not!" Lacus denied smoothly. "All I had in mind is the betterment of the lives of two of my best friends who are, I presume, tearing inside right now."

"Lacus…" Kira crossed his arms. "Are you sure about that?"

_Damn it._

"Ok, fine," Lacus admitted. "I did want things to be like last time…when both of them were very happy and together."

"_Together?_" Kira echoed.

"Yes."

"But Lacus, as much as I want to help them get back together, I think it's too late," Kira sighed.

"I know…" Lacus said. "Meyrin would be hurt as well."

"That's right."

"But," Lacus started. "I felt that Cagalli should come, even if she doesn't want to get back together with Athrun."

"Why?"

"Kira…they haven't seen or spoken to each other for two years! It's not right!" Lacus bit her lip. "The second war ruined them and broke them into pieces. Their relationship can't be strained like that. Even you have a hard time looking at both of them in the eyes…you told me that, remember?"

Kira sighed. "I remember."

"I just feel that it's not right to just leave their relationship like that," Lacus bowed her head.

"I know," Kira walked towards her and hugged her. "I feel that way too."

"Do you really, Kira?" Lacus said with puppy dog eyes.

"Yes."

"I just hope…I just hope that everything's going to be alright in the end." Lacus sighed.

"Don't worry, everything's going to be fine…" Kira combed Lacus' long pink hair.

"Yeah…maybe…"

"Besides, they've got a great matchmaker," Kira grinned and they laughed, hoping for the best.

* * *

**So, this kind of follows Lacus' perspective after her conversation with Cagalli from Chapter 3, I hope you liked it.**

**Please review!**


	6. Chapter 4

**Lost Love

* * *

**

**Chapter 4**

It was a sunny day in Aprilius 1 as one can expect. Cagalli, in a disguise, rented a Mercedes and drove towards the directions the GPS was telling her.

Though Kira and Lacus knew where she lived, she did not know where they lived. Yes, she had their address but she just didn't know where the place was. Sitting on the passenger seat and looking outside the window in awe and wonder was Carina Ashlyn.

"Mommy?"

"Yes, Sweetie?" Cagalli said, her eyes never leaving the road.

"Where are we going?"

"We are going to the home of Grandma Caridad's son-my brother."

"Mommy's brother?" Carina looked at Cagalli wonderingly.

"Yes," Cagalli said.

"But if he is Mommy's brother and he is Grandma's son, then why do you call Grandma 'Aunt'?" Carina asked with curious eyes.

"Uh…well, it's complicated," Cagalli said, a bit uncomfortable.

"What does 'complicated' mean?" Carina asked innocently.

"Well, it means hard to understand…" Cagalli sighed.

"Oh…" Carina swung her legs back and forth. "Wow!"

They reached the home of the leader of PLANT and seeing that Carina never set foot at the Athha Manor, you could imagine her awe upon seeing the great estate.

After the standard procedure and security check, Cagalli was let in and saw the happy couple standing outside, waiting for them.

"Alright, Sweetie," Cagalli turned to her daughter. "You see, your Uncle Kira and Aunt Lacus-the two people you see outside, do not know who you are yet. So I'm going to go out first, ok?"

"Ok," Carina nodded.

Cagalli sighed and stepped out of the car, leaving her 'disguise' in the process. She walked towards her brother and sister-in-law, smiling.

"Cagalli!" Lacus ran towards her and hugged her tightly. "I'm so glad you could make it."

"Yeah," Cagalli said, not knowing what else to answer.

"Hey, sis," Kira walked towards his wife and his sister. "I'm quite surprised but nevertheless, happy, I guess."

"I know," Cagalli said.

"How are you feeling?" Kira asked worriedly. "I mean with Athrun and all…"

"Well, a bit hurt, to tell you the truth," Cagalli shrugged. "But if it's meant to be…"

Lacus frowned-almost pouting and all of a sudden her face lit up. "Oh, yes! I almost forgot! You said you were bringing a guest. Is he here?"

"You brought a guest along with you?" Kira raised an eyebrow. "As in your date?"

"Whoever said the guest's a 'he'?" Cagalli said with an amused expression on her face.

"So, the guest is _not_ your date?" Lacus said, can't resisting the wide smile after hearing the fact that Cagalli didn't bring along a man with her.

"Not unless you meant company or chaperone," Cagalli smiled softly.

"So, who is she?" Kira asked, obviously curious. "Myrna? Or Mom?"

"Uh, no…" Cagalli moved towards the car and opened the door. Carina was waiting there just like the good girl she is. Cagalli picked her up and turned to face Kira and Lacus.

Even without any introductions, the atmosphere became a little tense and nobody said anything for a while until the one year old interrupted the silence.

"Hi," she said in her angelic voice.

"Um, guys," Cagalli started. "This is Carina Ashlyn, my daughter."

"Y-your daughter?" Kira's eyes widened.

"Um…_adopted_ daughter," Cagalli corrected and mentally slapped herself in the face why she hadn't said that in the first place.

"You adopted a daughter?" Lacus said. "When?"

"A year ago…when she was born," Cagalli explained. "Sorry I didn't tell you guys…I kind of forgot."

"How can you forget to tell us you had, no, adopted a daughter?" Kira asked incredulously.

Cagalli shrugged helplessly. She already knew it would be hard to break the news to them. Even Caridad said so.

"Oh, it's alright, Kira!" Lacus said, all giddy. "Look at her, she's adorable!"

"Thank you!" Carina giggled.

"Is-is she a coordinator?" Kira asked.

"What do you think?" Cagalli retorted.

"Oh, stop the questions, Kira!" Lacus said, excited. "We have a niece and she's just…ooh, I want a baby, Kira!"

At that, Kira froze and Cagalli tried to stifle her laughter while Carina looked around curiously.

"Kira?" Lacus waved her hand in front of Kira's face who took a deep breath.

Kira held Lacus' hands tightly, "Lacus, Honey, you're not exactly-you're not-"

Cagalli rolled her eyes, "Calm down, Kira. You guys are married for a year already. I wouldn't be surprised if Lacus _is _pregnant."

"You know, that reminds me…" Lacus placed a finger on her chin. "I forgot to tell you, I _am_ pregnant."

Kira's eyes widened. "Are-are you serious?"

Cagalli's expression was between amused and expectant.

"Just kidding!" Lacus grinned.

"Don't you _dare_ do that again," Kira narrowed his eyes on both his sister and his wife.

"Come on, let's go inside!" Lacus motioned to the door. "We'll prepare something for little Carina. What do you like, Dear?"

"Cookies!" Carina clapped her hands happily.

"Alright then!" Lacus patted the little girl on the head. "She's so cute, Cagalli!"

Lacus and Cagalli entered the house with Kira following behind, who, by the way, was still pissed off.

Cagalli put Carina on the couch and sat beside her. Kira sat on the adjacent chair while Lacus went to get some refreshments and snacks.

"Are you sure she's adopted?" Kira asked, analyzing his niece. "She sure doesn't seem like it."

"If she not adopted then what is she?" Cagalli arched an eyebrow.

"Well, the worst I could think of was that she's your biological daughter. And Athrun's" Kira said.

Well, he hit the bull's eye.

_Damn him and all that 'ultimate coordinator' crap!_

"Why would you think that?" Cagalli asked innocently.

"Well, I don't know…" Kira answered. "I guess it's just instinct?"

"Kira, believe me, she's adopted," Cagalli looked at her daughter who started playing with a nearby pillow.

"Does the kid know?"

"Yeah, she knows she's adopted. She's very smart…are all coordinators like this?" Cagalli turned her attention to Kira who just shrugged.

"Dunno," he said. "I mean, I guess Athrun's pretty much like that when he was a baby…I don't know, I'm not that sociable…you know that."

"Oh, yeah," Cagalli agreed. "You _are _socially inept."

"Don't have to rub it in. I _do_ have friends you know," Kira replied.

And then Lacus came back into the room with a tray, "Cookies anyone?"

* * *

Cagalli sighed and unintentionally tightened her hold on Carina.

"Mommy, you're hurting me!" Carina complained.

"Oh, sorry, Sweetie," Cagalli apologized.

"Nervous?" Lacus asked.

"Very…" Cagalli sighed. "I mean I haven't seen them for two years!"

"I know, don't worry, you'll be great," Lacus soothed her friend.

"Alright, here we are," Kira called from the driver's seat. "You ready, sis?"

"Yeah," Cagalli replied. She got up from the car, carrying Carina in her arms.

"Mommy, you're so white," Carina tilted her head. "Is Mommy sick?"

"Oh, no," Cagalli assured her. "Mommy's fine. Mommy's just glad because she's seeing her friends today."

"Ooh…" Carina smiled widely. "Will Carina see them too?"

"Yes, Sweetie, of course you will."

Someone stood by the door-an announcer, it seemed. He quickly recognized Lacus which was expected.

"My lady," He bowed.

"Please, it's ok," Lacus looked embarrassed by his actions and then placed her arm around Kira's. She took one last glance towards Cagalli, giving her an encouraging smile and a nod. Cagalli nodded back and gave her a reassuring smile.

"Presenting Mr. Kira Yamato and Mrs. Lacus Clyne-Yamato, Chairwoman of the PLANT Supreme Council."

The doors opened and in walked the couple. The announcer recognized Cagalli as well and gave her a polite nod to which she returned.

"What shall I address the young lady?" he inquired.

"Carina Ashlyn Athha, my daughter," Cagalli said and smiled at Carina. "We're guests of Lacus- I mean, Chairwoman Yamato."

"Yes, my lady," he smiled a little.

"And presenting the guests of Mrs. Yamato- Chief Representative Cagalli Yula Athha of the Orb Union and her daughter, Ms. Carina Ashlyn Athha."

Cagalli took a deep breath and entered the room, letting herself into whatever might happen next.

* * *

**Lacus' character might be a little off, I'm not sure and I don't exactly know what a coordinator toddler is capable of so forgive me if I made Carina's abilities a bit extreme for her age but nevertheless, I hope you guys liked it.**

**Please review!**


	7. Chapter 5

**Lost Love **

* * *

**Chapter 5**

It was silent, which was weird since there must have been at least fifty people there-the bride and groom included. But their reaction was nevertheless expected.

I mean imagine that a person you hadn't seen in two years suddenly came out in the open carrying a one year old child who she claimed was her daughter. Sure, that was _very_ normal.

And the only sound Cagalli heard was a snort which came from Shinn who was then silenced when Lunamaria slapped him on the shoulder.

Cagalli looked around, keeping that pleasant smile on her face. _Party crasher_, she thought.

She knew more than half of the guests, or at least recognized them. There was Dearkka, Yzak, Miriallia and Shiho on one side. Mwu, Murrue and Andrew were there. Behind them were people she recognized as some of the crew from the Eternal and the Archangel. Shinn, Luna and also some people from the crew of the Minerva were across the earlier ones she mentioned. And I guess the friends they made in those two years were scattered. Kira and Lacus stood there, looking at Cagalli, both a bit nervous.

_Well, it's now or never_, Cagalli thought.

She was, after all, the leader of Orb- all those training and etiquette lessons for nothing if she didn't do this right.

Cagalli walked towards Athrun and Meyrin who were at the front. Meyrin's hair flew freely. Of course, who in the right mind would wear pigtails to their engagement party?

Athrun, as one would expect, was wearing a tuxedo. Come to think about it, everyone was in formal wear here. _Of course they would be, stupid!_

Everyone was clad in gowns, cocktail dresses or tuxedos. Cagalli herself was in a dress which was borrowed from Lacus. She might have matured over the years but her hatred of dresses still remained. In this case, however, she'll have to wear one or else she'll look like a freak, if not already.

"Congratulations both of you," Cagalli said. Her voice cracked a little but she had been sure no one had noticed.

The couple was still in shock at her sudden arrival but Meyrin was the one who recovered first. "Um, we're glad you could make it, Miss Cagalli. We, uh, apologize for not inviting you. I hope you understand that our intentions were, uh…"

"It's alright," Cagalli feigned a smile. She didn't hate Meyrin but she didn't like her either.

"Athrun, Dear, you should say something," Cagalli could hear Meyrin's whisper. Athrun seemed not to hear her. He looked mesmerized by both Cagalli and the little girl in her arms.

"You-you have a daughter?" he said.

Cagalli looked at Carina who remained quiet all this time, "Yes, this is my adopted daughter, Carina Ashlyn. Carina?"

"Hi everyone," Carina giggled in her beautiful voice, waving her hand.

Meyrin was troubled by this toddler but she covered it well. There was something about this child that's special in both good and bad ways. She didn't know if it was only to herself but she had a feeling- a premonition of some kind.

"A coordinator?" Athrun gazed at those golden orbs that he had always loved.

"Yes," Cagalli replied. "I'm sorry as well to just come and barge in like this but Lacus invited me as her guest and of course, _as your friend_, I couldn't miss this chance."

"I hope you'll understand, Athrun," Lacus walked a step forward, smiling pleasantly.

"Of course," Athrun nodded. "It's a pleasure to have you with us today, Cagalli."

"My sentiments, exactly," Cagalli smiled and held out her hand.

Athrun looked at her and Meyrin, sensing the tense and affection radiating from her fiancé, took Cagalli's hand instead, quite immediately.

"We're very honored, Miss Cagalli to have you celebrate this special day with us." She said. "And your daughter is exceptionally adorable."

"Thank you," Carina chimed in. The little girl was indeed smart. She knew when she needed to speak or keep quiet and so far, she had done exceptionally well.

Meyrin couldn't resist. "May I?" she motioned towards little Carina.

"Of course, go ahead."

Meyrin caressed Carina's cheek and the little girl giggled once again at the contact.

"Please enjoy the night, Miss Cagalli," Meyrin said, a bit more cheerful.

"Thank you," Cagalli bowed her head a little. "Congratulations."

Cagalli moved towards her earlier company- the Chairwoman of the PLANT Supreme Council and her husband. Cagalli put Carina down. "How did I do?"

"Marvelous," Lacus touched Cagalli's hand swiftly.

"Cagalli!" Miriallia ran towards her and hugged her. "God, it's been so long!"

"Yeah, Milly, I missed you too," Cagalli grinned. "So, you're back with Dearkka?"

"Well…yeah, kind of," Milly said, a bit embarrassed by the fact. "It's so great seeing you though! Kira! You didn't tell me your sister's coming!"

"I didn't know either," Kira laughed.

By then, the atmosphere in the room returned to normal.

"Oh, so the wife kept it a secret, eh?" Milly taunted. "So, how was the feeling?" she turned to Lacus.

"Nerve-wrecking," Lacus grinned.

"Bummer…" Milly pouted. "Anyway, I can't believe you adopted a daughter…Carina Ashlyn…pretty name."

"Thanks," Cagalli said. "Carina, Sweetie, come here."

"_Sweetie?_" a male voice interrupted. "Never knew you were the type to call anyone 'Sweetie'."

"Great to see you too, Dearkka," Cagalli grinned.

"Yup, and pretty surprised to hear you've taken a child in," Dearkka gave Cagalli a bear hug.

Carina walked towards Milly and smiled widely. Milly noticed this and was entranced by the girl, carrying her. "God, this kid makes me want to have a child."

"Really? You too?" Lacus said excitedly. "That's what I said!"

"And Kira froze up," Cagalli said monotonously and Kira glared at Cagalli who just shrugged his glare off. "What about you Dearkka? Milly just said she'd like to have a baby. You up to it?"

"Sure he is," a new voice came in. "And he'll make an excuse about it too...he'll probably call it 'official council business' since he's in the council and he's got no heir yet."

"Yzak!" Cagalli smiled. "Are you still temperamental as always?"

"He improved…" Shiho grinned, answering the question. "I'm so glad you're alright, Cagalli! We've been pretty worried!"

"Oh, I really missed you guys!" Cagalli hugged her friend.

"She's so adorable!" Shiho almost squealed at the sight of Carina. "Hi, little one. Carina, was it?"

"Yes," Carina nodded.

"Carina, Sweetie," Cagalli said. "This one who's carrying you is Aunt Miriallia. This one with the long brown hair is Aunt Shiho. This is Uncle Dearkka and the last one is Uncle Yzak."

"Mommy, why does he have white hair? Is he _old_?" Carina asked innocently.

"You sure she's adopted?" Yzak growled. "Sure seemed like she's taken a lot from you."

He meant it as a joke but Cagalli felt a tinge of hurt still. "Of course, unless you're insinuating that I just hooked up with some random guy."

"Wouldn't dream of it," Yzak rolled his eyes. "Guys would be freaks if they got together with you."

A statement like that would have infuriated Cagalli but instead, she turned towards Shiho. "You know, I think you should enroll him again on those anger management classes."

At that, everyone laughed.

"Cagalli, I can't believe you're here!" Murrue came forward extending her arms. "How are you? Last I heard, you were still working your ass off!"

"I'm fine, thanks," Cagalli hugged the Captain. At the moment, the Archangel's hidden away until it is needed again and during that time, Murrue and Mwu went traveling. "How's married life treating you?"

"Actually," Mwu grinned, wrapping an arm around his wife's waist, "We're expecting a baby."

"Really?" Cagalli's eyes widened. "How many months?"

"We've only found out two weeks ago," Murrue said, a bit disappointed. "Damn, it's an engagement party and I can't even have a glass of champagne!"

"It's alright," Cagalli laughed. "It'll be worth the champagne."

"Hope so," Murrue smiled. "Now, how about you? I never knew you adopted a child."

"Yeah, well, it's kind of a secret," Cagalli admitted. "The media knows nothing, so I'll appreciate it if nobody said a word about her."

"Our lips are sealed-a soldier's promise." Mwu placed a hand on his heart mockingly.

"Silly boy!" Murrue nudged him on the ribs. "Don't worry, Cagalli, you can trust us."

"Yeah, I know," Cagalli said.

"So, the Chief Representative finally came forth," Cagalli turned around to see her friend, Commander Waltfeld who was still the Captain of one of the greatest ZAFT warships-the Eternal. "I was right when I said that wearing a dress suits you perfectly-your real appearance."

"Commander!" Cagalli's smile widened. "It's so great to see you."

"Yeah, you and me, both," Andrew agreed. "You and me both."

For the rest of the night, Cagalli became her normal self and mingled with friends and introduced Carina who, of course, garnered a lot of attention, to everyone. She even talked to Lunamaria and Arthur Trine. Shinn still ignored her but Luna apologized to the representative on his behalf.

She even spoke to Meyrin and wished her well- half-heartedly, that is.

The only person she hadn't spoken to for more than three sentences was probably Athrun. And he, on the other hand, had his focus divided the entire night. There was something about that little girl that was different and yet the same. And for some reason, he didn't believe Cagalli when she said that child was adopted.

This was his engagement party. And his fiancée wasn't Lacus as the people of PLANT once said nor was it Cagalli, the woman he truly loved even now but Meyrin, a girl who had his gratitude.

You could say that all three of them were the most important women in his life.

Lacus was his 'sister'. She was someone he'd protect and care about. She was the person he'd look to for comfort and encouragement and even though they broke up, they still cared for each other and love each other like family.

Then there was Cagalli-a girl who is the opposite of Lacus Clyne who was deemed as the perfect woman. She was rash and impulsive; honest and brave; caring and lovable; amusing and serious. She was the one who knocked sense into his thick skull and let him see light and hope in years. And most importantly, she was the one he wanted to protect the most and he loved her more than anything in the world.

Then Meyrin who saved his life despite many consequences, appeared. He was grateful to her and he cared about her, feeling that she was his responsibility since he got her involved in this whole mess. She loved him-he knew that and he agreed to this marriage because maybe, just maybe, she'll be able to fill the void in his heart when he left Cagalli in the second war.

Maybe he made a mistake, maybe not. But what did it mean when Cagalli and her adopted daughter, Carina came about unexpectedly?

Did he make the wrong decision? He'd have to find that out.

Love triangles? An 'adopted' daughter? An engagement? A marriage?

Things were getting so much more complicated.

* * *

**I hope this chapter wasn't too cheesy and that you all liked it!**

**As always, please review! =D**


	8. Chapter 6

**Lost Love **

* * *

**Chapter 6**

Most of the guests were going to return in three weeks for the bachelor and bachelorette parties and the actual wedding but a few of the engaged couple's closest friends were invited to stay with them at the Zala Mansion and spend the rest of the month with the betrothed couple. And Cagalli was one of those people. The married guests present shared a room together, obviously. But those who were dating were given the choice whether or not they'd wish to stay in one room.

It was a free country, after all.

It was a large mansion, to be honest. And all the guests that stayed there were very much comfortable. Since Carina was a child-a hyper one at that, which was probably taken from her mom- Athrun gave her permission to run around anywhere.

It was already ten in the evening. The men all went to the bar room for drinks while most of the girls went out shopping, leaving Lacus, Milly, Shiho and Cagalli to the indoor pool.

"Where's cutie pie?" Milly asked, her legs dipped into the warm water.

Cagalli laughed. "She's sleeping."

"Is it alright to just leave her like that?" Shiho asked worriedly, holding a glass of sparkling apple juice in her hand.

"It's fine," Cagalli said. "That child sleeps like a hog."

"Hm…" Lacus pondered for a while. "Why does it seem that little Carina takes a lot from you?"

"Well, old habits die hard," Milly said. "And Cagalli's didn't…she probably rubbed it off on her daughter."

"Really?" Lacus said. "Carina was ecstatic when we went shopping."

"Well, she does spend a lot of time with Myrna," Cagalli shrugged, taking her robe off, revealing a red tank top and white shorts.

"I'm just so glad to be off from work," Shiho stretched her arms. "It's been hectic."

"Really?" Cagalli sat down on a chaise lounge. "How so?"

"Well, now that both Yzak and Dearkka are on the council, I've been dumped with paperwork," Shiho wrinkled her nose.

"I could help you with that," Lacus grinned. "If you want…"

"Oh, no way, Lacus," Shiho waved her hand. "I'm just taking the heat off, nothing to worry about. But you know, truth be told, I'm kind of surprised with all this- this engagement, I mean."

"Yeah, I know what you mean," Milly sighed. "I kind of thought, wished, desired-you get the point, that you know, you and Athrun are getting back together. What happened?"

"Well, it was simple, actually," Cagalli said. "I hurt him, he hurt me…and I guess we thought that it would never work out so we just broke it off."

"Just like that?" Shiho asked, not quite convinced.

"Yeah, just like that," Cagalli confirmed.

"You guys didn't have a kiss or anything sweet? Break-up sex maybe?" Milly tilted her head.

"Break-up sex?" Cagalli arched an eyebrow.

"Sure, Dearkka and I did it," Milly admitted.

"Seriously? You slept with that guy?" Shiho asked incredulously.

"What, it's not as if it's illegal…" Milly pouted. "So, did you and Athrun have a sweet moment or what?"

Cagalli didn't know what to do. Telling her friends would release some of the load but it might risk everything. But then these _are_ her friends and she knew that she could very well trust them. After all, they weren't the type to gossip. Shiho's a soldier and Lacus, from what Cagalli heard, never liked giving interviews. Milly must be the one most prone to these things but even then, she's not exactly _that_ talkative either.

Right now, nobody could be there to help what Cagalli was going through and she wanted to have someone to talk to. She could trust these three girls- she knew that.

"Cagalli?" Lacus touched Cagalli's shoulder. "Are you listening?"

"Yeah, um, yeah," Cagalli looked down. "Guys…"

Cagalli took a deep breath. "I need to tell you something."

* * *

The next morning wasn't weird, or at least none of the other guests noticed anything different between the four ladies. As usual, the most cheerful person there was the child- Carina.

"Good morning!" She said in her high-pitched voice.

"Hi, Carina," Lunamaria greeted. "What do you want for breakfast? Does she have any favorites?" Hr last statement was directed towards Cagalli.

"No," Cagalli patted her daughter on the head. "Whatever's available is fine."

"Auntie Luna?" Carina called.

"Yes?"

"Is Uncle Shinn angry at me?" She said in a small voice. Everyone in the room looked at each other.

"Look, Shinn, the child herself thinks you're angry with her!" Luna scolded.

"What?" Shinn said.

"No, dear," Luna said in a child-like voice. "He's just in a bad mood, aren't you Shinn?" she nudged her boyfriend roughly.

Everyone laughed as Shinn winced and Cagalli let Lunamaria carry the one year old.

Cagalli sighed and reminisced the past night.

* * *

"Cagalli…" Shiho said as she sat on one of the couches. "What's your plan now?"

"I don't know," Cagalli answered. "What do you guys think? Was it a bad choice coming here?"

"No, absolutely not!" Milly said immediately. "And anyway, it's not like you're actually scheming to get Athrun back…are you?"

"No," Cagalli shook her head. "It's just that…God, I don't know. That's the problem-I've got no idea why the hell I'm here!"

"Maybe it's a sign?" Lacus suggested. "That you and Athrun are meant to be together."

"Yeah," Shiho agreed. "Maybe that's it."

"But it was my choice to come here," Cagalli argued.

"Yeah, well, influence has got a large role on your choice," Milly pointed out. "And besides, the only reason you and Athrun broke up was because you think it would never work out and not because you guys just fell out of love."

"You _do_ have a child…" Lacus said quietly. "We understand why you'd keep it secret. These days...it's so hard."

"I'm sorry you guys," Cagalli sighed. "Right now…"

"If you're that worried, Cagalli," Shiho started. "It would be best if you just make the decisions you deemed as correct now and regret them later. You still love Athrun and especially since he's the one who's engaged…either way, someone's going to get hurt, even if we don't like the one _who's getting hurt_."

"I know," Cagalli said sadly. "Carina's sake is also on the line here and I can't afford to be selfish- not now."

Milly laughed. "Selfish? Cagalli, for the past years that you became chief representative, you have been nothing but selfless."

"Yes, you owe this to yourself, Cagalli," Lacus held her friend's hand. "You deserve your own happy ending."

"You guys…thanks so much," Cagalli said, almost crying.

* * *

"So, what's the itinerary today, sis?" Meyrin sat on a stool beside Athrun. "Since you're the wedding and party planner here, what's the plan?"

"Well," Luna put Carina down on one of the highchairs who took interest on playing with the spoon. "I thought it might be fun to go horse-back riding."

"Horse-back riding?" Dearkka echoed. "Huh."

"Takes your mind off of mobile suits, huh?" Yzak leaned back on a chair, a tinge of irony in his voice.

"Yeah, horses are like the classic mobile suits of the past," Shiho said. "Sounds fun."

"Yeah, sis," Meyrin agreed. "Great thinking. We're almost all soldiers- most mobile suit pilots even."

"Would it be ok though? For Carina?" Athrun said, making Cagalli glance at him and the other three girls (Lacus, Milly and Shiho) looked at each other. "She might be too young for that."

"Oh, that's fine! Someone could be with her-Cagalli, maybe?" Luna suggested, looking at the blonde.

"Yeah, sure, I guess it's fine," Cagalli nodded.

"So, it's settled then!" Meyrin declared. "We'll go horse-back riding later-maybe after lunch?"

When the time was met with the approval of all, everyone got ready and ate brunch.

It was already one and they were leaving for the ranch/ stable. Luna said she knew a great place with beautiful horses and a lovely garden to walk through.

"Come on, Carina," Cagalli carried her as well as their bag. Cagalli wore a cap and put a floral hat on Carina's head. For a tomboy, she liked dressing her daughter up. "Let's get this show on the road."

* * *

**I'm not so sure about horse-back riding thing...it just popped into my mind and I thought it'll do fine in this fic...if you guys have any problems with it though, just say so- I wouldn't mind.**

**And I also hope you wouldn't mind the fact that Cagalli told Lacus, Milly and Shiho earlier than Athrun or Kira.**

**Nevertheless, I hope you all liked it and please review!**

**Happy New Year, everyone!**


	9. Chapter 7

**Lost Love **

* * *

**Chapter 7**

"It's ok if I didn't wear a disguise, right?" Lacus asked, directing her question towards Cagalli who was in the back seat with Carina on her lap.

"Well, I don't think it'll really matter," Cagalli answered. "Besides, I'm sure they're all professionals. They wouldn't gush out and blush madly at your presence, I'm sure."

"Hm…" Lacus pondered. "Kira?"

"It's your choice," Kira said. "But I _do_ prefer you without the disguise."

"I guess…" Lacus leaned back.

They were using three cars. Kira, Lacus, Cagalli and Carina in one, Milly, Shiho, Yzak and Dearkka occupy another and the last one filled Athrun, Meyrin, Shinn and Lunamaria.

"It's a bit windy, don't you think?" Meyrin said, wrapping an arm around Athrun's.

"I think it's perfect," Luna pointed out. "Come on, I was able to reserve the whole place for the day…let me talk to the manager."

Luna headed for the man with a trimmed mustache and a cowboy hat and started a conversation with him.

"Alright!" Luna came back. "Let's go and pick a horse! Oh, Cagalli, the guy told me Carina could ride a horse but with adult supervision."

"Oh, ok," Cagalli said. "Thanks, Luna."

Dearkka and Milly were the first ones out riding and into the large garden.

"You difficult woman!" Yzak said a bit louder than usual. "I told you to move your leg this way!"

"Alright, then, Mr. Know-it-All," Shiho retorted. "Why don't _you_ get on the horse? Let's see you do it in ten seconds! Ten…nine…eight…"

Cagalli heard Athrun chuckle behind her. "Same as always- those two."

Cagalli turned around and smiled. "Yeah, but at least they make up in a few hours."

"Athrun, Honey," They heard Meyrin call. "Could you help me?"

"Oh, sure," Athrun strode over to Meyrin's side.

Cagalli couldn't watch when Athrun placed his hands on Meyrin's waist and then Meyrin giggled.

"Sweetie," Cagalli said to Carina. "What horse would you like?"

"Ooh…" Carina smiled widely. "I want the yellow one!"

"Which yellow?" Cagalli went over to a few of the blonde ones. "This one?"

"No!" Carina shook her head. "I want the big one!"

"But, you might fall down," Cagalli reasoned. "And you could hurt your leg or arm."

"But," Carina pouted. "The others got to ride the big ones!"

"That's because they're older, Sweetie," Cagalli said, a bit amused.

"Can't Mommy ride with me on the big horse?" Carina said.

"But we might fall, Mommy's not very good…" Cagalli started.

"If you want, I can take her," A voice said, a voice she knew all too well. Cagalli turned around and saw Athrun again.

"No, it's alright," Cagalli declined his offer. "You should go and be with Meyrin."

"Meyrin can handle a few minutes without me," Athrun said, a bit fierce.

"Do I get to ride on a large horse?" Carina cut in.

"Sure, any horse you want," Athrun smiled sweetly at Carina. "You'd be ok with it right?"

"Yeah, sure," Cagalli said with a small smile. "Do you want to ride with Uncle Athrun, Sweetie?"

"Yes!" Carina clapped her hands, giggling.

Athrun took Carina from Cagalli and set her up on the horse that Carina chose. Cagalli smiled at the scene but she can't help but feel guilty too.

"What horse would you like to ride on, Miss?" Cagalli heard someone's voice. She turned around to see a man, the same age as her, grinning.

"Oh, hi," Cagalli greeted. "You work here?"

"No, not exactly. The manager's my Dad," he said. "I'm just lookin' around. Name's Kent, by the way."

"Hi, Kent," Cagalli smiled politely.

"So, you picked a horse already?" Kent asked.

"No," Cagalli admitted. "I'm not used to riding horses. What can you suggest?"

"Well, like the little girl said earlier, the blonde ones are more beautiful," Kent said. "Which suits you perfectly."

"Oh," Cagalli felt her cheeks redden a little. "Thanks."

Kent helped her get on one and told her a few instructions. "So, you ready?"

"Yeah," Cagalli nodded. "Thanks again."

"I'll see you later," He said and Cagalli slowly walked out of the stable to find Lacus waiting for her in front of the entrance of the garden.

"I saw Athrun…with Carina," Lacus said as soon as Cagalli reached her. "Do you think that's fine?"

"Yeah, it's not like the end of the world if that happens," Cagalli said as they started to walk through a path. "And maybe it'd be nice that both of them could spend some time with each other even if they _are_ oblivious of the fact that they're father and daughter."

"I guess you're right," Lacus said. "What took you so long though?"

"I, uh, was helped by the son of the manager."

"Did he flirt with you?" Lacus asked, a bit irritated by this person.

"Well, technically, I've got no idea. I've only been with Athrun and we never exactly flirted with each other," Cagalli said. "But he's nice to me."

"Oh," Lacus looked at the ground, gripping the reins. "Did-did you like him, though?"

"Well, like I said, he's nice," Cagalli sighed. "But…I don't know."

"Would you like to start another relationship?" Lacus pressed on. "Even if it's not with Athrun?"

"No, I don't think so," Cagalli said.

"And if it's with Athrun?" Lacus inquired.

"I don't know, I just don't know," Cagalli looked at Lacus. "Why are you suddenly asking these questions though?"

"No reason," Lacus smiled. "Look! It's Athrun!"

Cagalli's eyes moved towards the direction Lacus was pointing and smiled. Carina was laughing and it was evident that Athrun was also having a good time."

"They _are _father and daughter," Lacus whispered.

"Yeah," Cagalli nodded.

"Would you like to join them?" Lacus tilted her head.

"No," Cagalli shook her head. "I'm going to say goodbye to that moment anyway and I'd rather not experience that kind of pain. Not again."

"Did you regret anything?" Lacus said quietly. "About your relationship with Athrun?"

"There are a lot of things I regret, Lacus," Cagalli looked up. "I regret most deciding to marry Yuuna."

"What about letting him go?" Lacus captured Cagalli's gaze. "Did you ever regret that?"

Cagalli chuckled. "Sometimes I do and sometimes I don't. It all depends on the situation."

"And on Carina's?"

Cagalli sighed. "Yes, I regret letting him go very much in Carina's case. She doesn't have a father by her side when she grows up…I don't want that."

Lacus held Cagalli's hand. "Don't worry; it's all going to work out. I'm sure of it."

* * *

**It's a bit repetitive- the conversations, I mean, but since Cagalli's confused and didn't know what she should do, she needed constant reassurance from those she trusted.**

**I took in some of the suggestions of my reviews and the result was this chapter so I hope you guys liked it.**

**If there's any problem, please notify me and I'll gladly take those suggestions into account.**

**As always, please review!**


	10. Chapter 8

**Lost Love **

* * *

**Chapter 8**

"When are you going to tell him?" Milly asked the blonde who was riding beside her.

"I'm not even sure I'm going to tell him," Cagalli answered.

"He seems pretty happy when he's with Carina," Shiho said.

"Yeah, but…I don't think telling him would be the right decision," Cagalli said. "Do you guys think otherwise?"

"No, we think it's you're decision to make, Cagalli," Shiho smiled.

"Besides, who are we to tell you what to do?" Milly said. "Are you afraid though? I mean, keeping this a secret for so long…"

"No, it's not that," Cagalli shook her head. "It's just that…God, I don't know!"

"By the way," Milly said, dropping the subject but her eyes have an evil look in them. "I heard you met a guy today…"

"Seriously?" Shiho jerked her head. "Was he cute?"

"You guys!" Cagalli can't help but feel heat rising up her cheeks. "It's not like that!"

"Yuh-huh," Milly raised an eyebrow. "And you're not blushing from head to toe."

"Come on, Cagalli," Shiho said, her eyes pleading. "What does he look like?"

"Ahem," Cagalli cleared her throat. "Aren't you two seeing people?"

"This is your love life we're talking about!" Milly said.

"And we're just getting you to admit…some…facts?" Shiho said, a bit uncertain.

"Ok," Cagalli sighed. "Fine…He's good-looking…"

"Athrun-good-looking?" Lacus joined the conversation.

"Um Lacus, aren't you _married_ to my brother?" Cagalli asked incredulously.

"Yes!" Lacus defended. "But hey, you've got to admit, Athrun's gorgeous."

"Yeah," Shiho nodded. "But dumb."

"And stupid." Milly added.

"Damn it," Cagalli cursed. "Why the hell can't I understand you guys?"

* * *

They returned their horses after a few laughs and the group decided to head back home and retire early.

Cagalli couldn't sleep though. After rolling about the bed for half an hour, she got up and made herself some tea. Coffee wouldn't do any good since it'll only make her insomnia worse.

She walked outside and looked up at the starry night, sitting on a stone bench. Maybe if she didn't decide to marry that goofball, _this_ would be her engagement. She shook her head and smiled sadly to herself.

"I'm pathetic," She whispered.

She heard a ruffle of leaves and looked back sharply. What she saw was someone with black hair and red eyes.

"Shinn," Cagalli stood up from her seat.

"What are _you_ doing here?" He said, a bit disgusted.

"I couldn't sleep," Cagalli smiled a little. "You too?"

"I don't need to answer you," Shinn spat. "Mind your own business."

Cagalli looked at him and sighed. "You really hate me, don't you?"

"Is it _that_ obvious?" Shinn retorted with sarcasm in his voice. "You killed my family."

"You _blame_ me and my father for their deaths," Cagalli pointed out. "And it's not going to change any time soon, right?"

"…"

"I thought so," Cagalli sighed again. "Shinn, I know you hate me with all you've got but in some ways, we're both the same. I blamed others for my own mistake and look what it did," Cagalli laughed bitterly. "It bit me on the ass."

"Are you insinuating that I _killed_ my own family?" Shinn questioned angrily.

"No," Cagalli said softly. "What I'm trying to say is that you blame others when they have done nothing wrong. And it's worse than that. Your family's death wasn't anyone's to blame at all."

"How dare you!"

Cagalli finally glared at the young man before her. "You told me I never understood anything four years ago, remember? And you were right. I didn't understand some things but know this; you didn't understand so much either. No one understood each other completely because the pain we experienced was different even though it was so much alike."

"You…"

"I already knew my father was going to die," Cagalli said in a small voice. "Yet I couldn't do anything. Do you not know how it feels to just let someone die? To feel so helpless?" Cagalli closed her eyes. "We fought in those wars because we wanted to protect, not because we wanted the glory or because we wanted to kill- certainly not that. Kira and Athrun…and even you…we all wanted to protect because I mean, if given the choice, I wouldn't go out there and risk my life for nothing."

"_Then you're nothing but a destroyer…_" Shinn murmured to himself.

"What?"

"That's what Athrun said to me…when he was still our commander, trying to enlighten me," Shinn looked up. "_'If you're only fighting for the sake of your own righteousness or because it conveniently suits your purposes, then you're nothing but a destroyer…'_"

"He's right, you know," Cagalli said. "Do you know why Athrun went back to ZAFT?"

Shinn shook his head.

"It's because he felt useless," Cagalli told him. "There are also times when we felt useless and we couldn't stand it, naturally because we knew we could fight. We had the ability. Why are we wasting time and just sitting around when we could've been of use?"

"We didn't know what to do- what to use all that power for," Shinn said with a small voice.

"But once we do know, we'll be able to make a difference," Cagalli placed a hand on Shinn's shoulder and was glad he didn't shrug it off. "You did, didn't you?"

"I guess…"

"It took me too long to understand, to tell you the truth. And in war and even during peaceful times, there are only questions to ask: what you _want_ to do, what you _can_ do and what you've _got_ to do," Cagalli repeated her own words.

Under the midnight sky, Shinn grinned a little, "You know, it wasn't so bad talking to you, of all people after all."

"Do you still hate me?" Cagalli asked.

"No," Shinn shook his head. "But I don't like you either."

Cagalli chuckled, "Good night, Shinn."

"Yeah, you too, Athha,"

"You can call me Cagalli if you want," Cagalli offered.

"That's not going to happen in a long time…Athha."

Cagalli looked back and shrugged, smiling, "Fair enough."

* * *

**I hope that Cagalli and Shinn's conversation wasn't very unrelated to the fic at all. I guess I wanted them to reconcile and experience closure. They might not be friends yet but at least they're not at each other's throats, right?**

**So, I hope you guys liked it. **

**Thanks for all the suggestions and I'm sure to make use of most of them, if not all. Please keep them coming.**

**Thanks for all the support as well. As always, please review!**

**P. S. I'm going to make Kent appear in the next chapter and if all goes well, maybe even the next few chapters. **

**Oh, and starting the fourth of January, my updates might get slower...it's almost time for school again!**


	11. Chapter 9

**Lost Love **

* * *

**Chapter 9**

_**2 days later**_

"So, you're really going to the city?"

"Yeah, sure," Cagalli said, lifting Carina. "Carina wanted to see the sights."

"Damn credit card limits," Milly cursed.

Cagalli laughed. "Come on, Lacus is coming. It'll be fun."

"Can't," Milly made a face. "The urge is too much. I'm really at my limit."

"Ok then," Cagalli sighed. "You can keep Shiho company…by the way, what's she going to do today?"

"One, I doubt I can even keep her company because two, she's going to check some military stuff," Milly pouted. "I'm all alone."

Then Carina giggled. "Mommy, I saw Auntie Milly and Uncle Dearkka kissing!"

Cagalli arched an eyebrow and grinned evilly, "See, you won't be _that_ lonely!"

Milly blushed and yelled, "_Oh, you're such a bad mother_! I _can't believe_ you'd let your daughter see _people make out_!"

But Cagalli rolled her eyes and just laughed. "_So, so, sorry_."

"Whatever," Milly huffed. "Have fun, I guess."

* * *

"So, are you girls ready?" Kira asked.

"Yes," Lacus nodded, donning a brown wig and sunglasses.

Kira frowned slightly. "I like your natural look better."

Cagalli rolled her eyes. "This is for her safety, brother."

"I know, I know," Kira said, a bit impatient. "So, to the December City Square?"

"Yes," Lacus said. "Cagalli and I need to go shopping."

"Me?" Cagalli arched an eyebrow. "I only came along because Carina wanted to look around."

Lacus sighed and shook her head. "Some things never change."

They reached a place with malls and stores surrounding a large lawn. It was two in the afternoon so the lampposts weren't lit yet. Noise and laughter filled the air and there seemed to be a joyous atmosphere.

Carina looked at the place in awe and wonder.

"Do you like the city square, Carina?" Lacus asked tenderly.

"Yes," the little girl nodded.

"So, where are we heading to first?" Cagalli asked, taking in the beauty of the place, carrying her daughter in her arms as she got out of the car.

"Well," Lacus pondered for a while. "We could go to this boutique I heard about that just opened. They say it's famous."

"So, we'll be shopping," Cagalli said and grinned. "While Kira here will be the bag boy. _Again_."

"Exactly!" Lacus agreed and giggled while Kira made a face at his sister.

They entered a boutique named _"Josephine"_ and Cagalli was surprised at the sight. The grand chandelier shone brightly and there were mirrors everywhere. The glossy white counter was in front of a sophisticated-looking young woman. The clothes were either neatly folded or in racks, organized by color. Sales clerks roamed around the large store, assisting the customers. A soft and calm melody could be heard around the room.

"May I help you, Sir, Madams?" A sales clerk came near the four.

"Oh, it's alright," Lacus answered. "We'll just be looking."

"Of course," the sales clerk gave a bow and proceeded to another person who came in the shop.

"The clothes are nice and very sophisticated." Lacus approached a rack and took out a salmon colored blouse with ruffles. "What do you think, Cagalli?"

"They're…ok…I guess," Cagalli shrugged.

"Hey," Lacus said. "This one suits you."

She held a forest green cocktail dress lined with sequins and a few ruffles. "Why don't you try it on?"

"Lacus," Cagalli said. "Why don't you try it on yourself? I don't like shopping; you know that, especially if it includes trying on something."

Lacus rolled her eyes. Yes, Lacus did just that. "Come on, it'll be fun and Carina wants you to do it too. Isn't that right, Dear?"

"Yes!" Carina giggled. "Mommy will look very pretty."

"See?" Lacus gave Cagalli an I-told-you-so look. "Go on. Kira, please take Carina from her mother."

"Go on, sis," Kira said as he took his niece from her mother. "It wouldn't hurt to try."

"Fine, I'll do it," Cagalli sighed.

Two hours of shopping and trying on stuff later, much to Cagalli's dismay and Lacus' joy, they went to a café and rested there for a while. The café, in all actuality was very sophisticated as well. With contemporary chairs and a chandelier with the aroma of coffee in the air, the ambiance was terrific.

"Athrun?" Lacus said while sipping tea.

"What?" the siblings looked up.

"Isn't that Athrun?" Lacus pointed to a blue-haired man walking by.

"Why's he here?" Kira asked and his wife helplessly shrugged. "I'll meet with him."

And soon, Athrun was joined by Kira who seemed to invite the blue-head to join the four of them.

"Athrun!" Lacus stood up. "What are you doing here?"

"Meyrin asked me to pick up something," Athrun grinned, showing a midnight amethyst carrier. "What are you guys doing here?"

"Shopping," Cagalli said the word disgustingly.

Athrun laughed, "Same as ever. Hi, Carina."

"Hi, Uncle Athrun," Carina waved her hand that was holding a cookie. "Are you joining us?"

The others looked at Athrun expectedly and he smiled, "Sure, why not?" and took a seat.

"You know," Kira started. "This is just like old times."

"Yeah, I know what you mean," Cagalli agreed. "Just the four of us."

"Well," Lacus pointed out. "Carina's with us…"

"Might as well," Athrun shrugged. "We always had a child or two with us from Reverend Malchio's place."

And everyone laughed.

* * *

Then Lacus' phone started ringing, "Please excuse me, I'll take this outside."

"I wonder what that's about," Cagalli said, looking at her friend who just walked outside, talking to the phone.

"I hope it's not some politics thing," Kira sighed. "She's been working pretty hard."

"Oh, bad news!" Lacus rushed in. "The council sent some papers to the city hall here in December City and I need to see them through immediately. Kira?"

Cagalli looked at her brother sympathetically. "You spoke too soon, Kira."

"Come on," Kira got up from his seat. "How long will it take?"

"Not that long, I hope," Lacus said. "You guys will be ok, right? I'm so sorry!"

"Don't worry," Cagalli waved a hand.

"It's no big deal," Athrun said. "You guys go ahead. We'll meet up later, then, I suppose?"

"Sure," Kira said and took Lacus' hand.

"Bye bye Uncle Kira, Auntie Lacus!" Carina waved.

"Bye, Carina!" Lacus called and out they went.

"She's cute," Athrun said suddenly, tilting his head.

"Thanks," Cagalli smiled.

"Why have you never told any of us that you adopted a child?" Athrun caressed Carina's cheek.

"Sorry," Cagalli smiled apologetically. "I wanted to protect her…from the media and paparazzi, especially with everything that's going on."

"I see," Athrun said. "Cagalli."

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry," Athrun sighed.

"Huh?" Cagalli said, confused. "What are you sorry for?"

"I'm just sorry…sorry for hurting you," Athrun smiled sadly.

"You-." Cagalli's breath hitched. "You've got nothing to be sorry for. You didn't hurt me…I hurt you."

"Yeah," Athrun nodded. "But…I shouldn't have treated you like the way I did."

"No," Cagalli shook her head, cleaning Carina's chin with a napkin. "I deserved it after all."

"I don't think so," Athrun said, capturing her gaze. "You deserve more than that."

Cagalli smiled genuinely. "Thanks."

* * *

"What are the papers about?" Kira asked while getting into the car.

"Nothing," Lacus replied blankly.

"What?" Kira looked shocked. "What did you mean 'nothing'?"

"Oh, I just made that up," Lacus gave a quick smile.

"Then, what was that phone call about?" Kira asked.

"That was Milly," Lacus explained. "I texted her to call me."

"Why?" Kira narrowed his eyes.

"To give Athrun and Cagalli alone time, of course!" Lacus said defiantly.

"Um…Honey, are you trying to cancel Athrun and Meyrin's wedding?" Kira held her hand.

Lacus bowed her head. "Maybe…?"

"Lacus," Kira said exasperatedly. "I know you want to get Athrun and Cagalli back together- I mean, I do too- but I think it's too late."

"It's not," Lacus said in a small voice. "It's not. Nobody said 'I do' yet."

"I know," Kira sighed. "But a wedding is supposed to be a happy occasion and not a day when somebody gets hurt."

"I know," Lacus bit her lip. "Did I do the wrong thing, Kira?"

"No," Kira shook his head and smiled. "You didn't. It's not like they'll be kissing at the end of the day…they're just friends who are spending some time together."

"I guess…" Lacus leaned back.

"Ok, so what do we do now?" Kira tilted his head to face his wife.

Lacus looked thoughtful for a moment and grinned. "Let's spy on them!"

"_What?_"

* * *

**Ok, I said that Kent will be appearing in this chapter but I don't have time to write the part when he appears so I'll just write him in the next chapter.**

**My updates might be awfully slow for the next chapters...but thanks for understanding the dilemma I'm sure all writers experience if they are still in school.**

**Again, please review!**


	12. Chapter 10

**Lost Love **

* * *

**Chapter 10**

"You really don't have to do this, you know," Cagalli said, a little embarrassed.

"It's alright," Athrun smiled. "Besides, you don't know the place well and you don't have a car with you."

"Right," Cagalli said. "But wouldn't Meyrin be looking for you though?"

"It's fine," Athrun said.

"Mommy, where are we going next?" Carina looked up. She had been walking since coming out of the café, holding her mother's hand.

"Well…uh…Athrun?" Cagalli looked at him.

"Where do you want to go?" Athrun looked around. "We've got a few hours before it gets dark…has she ever gone to an amusement park before?"

"No," Cagalli shook her head. "But seriously, Athrun, it's not necessary."

"Come on," Athrun urged. "Let it be my apology for not inviting you."

Cagalli looked at him and smiled a little, "I guess it's ok…"

* * *

"Mommy!" Carina tugged at Cagalli's skirt (Yes, _a skirt_), running on the path surrounded with many attractions. Cagalli laughed while Athrun followed behind, smiling.

"Do you want to go on a ride?" Cagalli bent down to the level of Carina. "What about that one?"

Carina looked at the ride her mother was pointing at and scowled. "I don't want that one! I want…that one!"

She pointed to a roller coaster that had twists and turns that will probably make you vomit. Cagalli stopped and pursed her lip in nervousness. "Sweetie, that's too dangerous."

"Why don't you try that one instead?" Athrun pointed to the grand carousel at the center of the park.

"Ooh, horsie!" Carina clapped her hands. "Just like two days ago!"

"Yes," Athrun patted her on the head. "But this time, you'd get to ride it on your own."

"Mommy!" Carina tugged on Cagalli's skirt again. "I want that one! I want that one!"

"Alright, come on," Cagalli led the way to the ride.

Soon, they were picking horses. Carina picked a large golden one with a bronze mane. Her parents took the ones beside it, placing her in the middle. The ride started and the horses began to move up and down. Carina gripped the gold bar and giggled as children's song played.

"Ok, what ride do you want to go on next?" Cagalli asked.

"That one!" Carina pointed at a Ferris wheel.

"Ok,"

They got in a beautifully designed carriage and at once, Carina jumped on the seat, pushed her hands against the wall and looked down at the view as their carriage starts to go up.

"This would've been more beautiful if it's at night," Athrun mused.

"Yeah, but, look…it's sunset," Cagalli looked out and saw a golden orb sinking into the dark.

After a few rounds, they came out and rode the children's roller coaster. And Carina giggled all the way through the ride even if the other kids were scared.

They had a few more rides and finally went to the booths and stalls.

"That one!" Carina pointed to a gun shooting booth.

Wow, she's _really_ the daughter of two war veterans.

Athrun looked at Cagalli, as if asking whether it's alright to play.

"Sure and I'll kill you if you didn't get the grand prize," Cagalli teased.

"I'll take that bet," Athrun grinned smugly. "Sir, I'll play."

"Ok," The man gave Athrun a handgun. "The rules are simple. There are three stages. The first one is to shoot that pyramid of paper cups in one shot. Second is to hit all the rubber ducks, not chickens. Hit one chicken, you're out. For the last stage, little helium balloons will float from the bottom. Hit as many as you can. If you hit all of them, that big guy's yours. If not, then sorry."

"Ok, I got it." Athrun took a stance and shot the pyramid of paper cups. The impact was enough to make them all fall down, hence, Athrun got to the second stage.

Carina giggled. "Go, Uncle Athrun!"

Athrun was able to hit all the ducks, not chickens and so proceeded to the last stage. In an instant, you could hear the balloons pop almost simultaneously as Athrun shot them, again and again.

The man gaped at Athrun as he gave him the huge white stuffed bear with a red ribbon tied to its neck. Even for a coordinator, his shooting skills were marvelous. I mean, the man saw many people win the prize but Athrun had the record. He'd done the game in about five minutes.

"Here you go, Carina," Athrun handed the stuffed toy to Carina which was almost twice her size. Seeing as how the little girl couldn't move anymore while carrying the bear, Athrun took her in his arms with Cagalli by their side.

"I won," Athrun said, smug.

"Yeah," Cagalli sighed. "I should've known better than to challenge you, of all people when it comes to guns."

After a few more booths, Athrun, Cagalli and Carina took a seat at a restaurant inside the park. Their table was filled with different kinds of stuffed animals, big and small.

"Did you have fun?" Athrun asked Carina.

"Yes, Uncle Athrun, thank you so much," Carina bowed her head.

"It's my pleasure."

"It's getting late…have Kira and Lacus called yet?" Cagalli asked, looking at her watch.

"Let me see…" Athrun took out his phone. "Hm. Let me call them. Excuse me for a moment."

"Sure," And Athrun went outside of the restaurant.

* * *

"Yes, wait a minute, will you, Athrun?" Kira said, covering the phone with his hand. "Lacus, are you done yet?"

"Hm?" Lacus faced her husband and scowled. "Are they going back already?"

"Yes," Kira nodded.

They were, at the time, hiding in the bushes- much to Kira's chagrin- across the restaurant Athrun, Cagalli and Carina was. And funny as how Kira could easily see Athrun from his position.

"Fine, tell him that we're on our way." Lacus said. "I just finished going through the papers and if he asked, there's nothing to worry about- just something I needed to sign."

"Alright then," Kira sighed. "Hello, Athrun?"

"So, you guys done yet?"

"Yeah, we're already on our way…where are we going to meet?" Kira asked.

"How about the big fountain by the City Square?" Athrun suggested. "You know that place?"

"Sure I do," Kira said.

"Alright then, I'll tell Cagalli…" Athrun told him. "Hey, I just got a message from the command center. It seemed like there are some rumors about some people plotting something…I don't have the details yet."

"Will Cagalli and Lacus be safe?" Kira asked worriedly.

"I'm not sure…" Athrun sighed. "Why don't we meet up first at our rendezvous…maybe it'd be better if you came along with me. We'll drive the girls to the house and go to the command center then."

"Yeah," Kira agreed.

"Ok, I'll see you then," Athrun said. "Bye."

"Yeah, bye." Kira shut the phone and turned to his wife. "Come on."

Lacus looked up, a bit worried but nonetheless followed her husband.

* * *

"Hey, funny that I told you my name," Cagalli heard a voice. "When you never told me yours."

Cagalli looked up and saw a familiar face. "Kent? From the ranch?"

"Yeah," Kent grinned. "I never thought I'd see you here. So, mind telling me your name?"

"Sorry, my name's Cagalli," Cagalli introduced herself. "And this is Carina."

"Hi," Carina tilted her head, but not smiling widely as she used to when introduced to someone.

"Ah, yes," Kent nodded. "I remembered her. I saw that blue-haired guy that was also with you the other day. Is he your boyfriend?"

"No," Cagalli shook her head. "He's just a friend."

"Oh," Kent was thoughtful for a moment. "So, you're single?"

"Yeah," Cagalli said. "I guess I am."

"And it's ok to ask you out for a date then?" Kent looked hopeful.

"Oh," Cagalli grimaced. "Not that I don't want to but I'm just not exactly looking for a relationship now…"

"It's alright," Kent seemed disappointed. "We could just go out, as friends then?"

"Um…I guess it's ok," Cagalli said, a bit doubtful. "But I'm not sure if I could, actually."

"Why, where do you live?" Kent asked.

"Actually, I'm just visiting a friend here," Cagalli replied.

"Oh, so you don't know the place?" Kent inquired.

"Not exactly," Cagalli shrugged, smiling a little.

"Then, I'll show you around, you know," Kent suggested. "I've lived here my whole life…we could go to the places December City's famous of."

"I guess that's fine," Cagalli said. Besides, she had nothing better else to do. Three more weeks enduring the pain of Athrun and Meyrin _together_? No thanks. At least she'll have some fun. There's no harm in it. Kent seemed like a pretty nice guy, after all.

"I don't exactly know my schedule," Cagalli said. "Why don't I call you?"

"Sure thing," Kent grinned and gave her a piece of paper with his phone number. "I got to go. It was nice seeing you again, by the way and I'll be looking forward to your call."

"Thanks," Cagalli smiled, nodding.

Shortly after, Athrun returned. "Hey, who was that guy?"

"Oh, he's someone I met back at the ranch," Cagalli answered. "He asked me if he could show me around."

"And you said yes?"

"Well, not exactly," Cagalli said. "I just said I'd call him."

"You do know that any one of us could do that, right?" Athrun arched an eyebrow. He didn't know why he was acting like this. Maybe he was just protective. After all, Cagalli's an important person in the world. Or maybe he just didn't want her to go out with any other guy?

"Yeah, but, he seemed like a nice guy," Cagalli replied. "And having other company wouldn't be so bad."

"Did he recognize you, though?" Athrun asked. Though knowing that it was kind of impossible since Cagalli wore a red wig when outside, there was still a chance she could be recognized and no matter what the circumstances were, he still couldn't take that risk.

"I don't think so," Cagalli shook her head. "Anyway, what did Kira and Lacus say?"

"Oh, we'll be meeting them at the fountain in City Square. You saw that right?" Athrun said.

"Yeah," Cagalli nodded. "So, should we go? Carina's sleepy." Cagalli looked at her daughter whose eyes were drooping and Athrun nodded.

* * *

**So, I hope this would do as the first 'family moment' of Athrun, Cagalli and Carina and I hope it's not too cheesy or anything.  
**

**I hope you guys liked it and please review!**

**P. S. What do you guys think of a little action in the story and not just romance?**


	13. Chapter 11

**Lost Love **

* * *

**Chapter 11**

"So, what's the story?" Kira asked, sliding into the passenger seat.

They had just dropped Cagalli and Lacus off and informed them that they might go home late because something popped up. The two understood and asked nothing more on the matter.

"Well, as I said, I don't know any details…yet," Athrun sighed.

"Whose message was it?" Kira inquired.

"It was Shiho's," Athrun answered, taking his phone from his pocket. "Here."

Kira opened the message and it read:

_Knight, sorry to interrupt whatever you may have been doing but there's something going on here at the Knight's table. The others and I are still doing research but as far as I know, the two princesses might be in danger. You and if possible, the prince, too, should come here ASAP. The wall should be raised where the wedding will take place. Tell the two advisers to be in charge of that and tell the subjects to be ready for anything. I don't know much yet but I've got a feeling in my gut that's something's not right. _

_Balsam_

"I've got a bad feeling about this," Kira said.

"That's already obvious," Athrun gritted his teeth. "I haven't contacted Shiho yet so I don't know what's going on _now_."

"It's sent to you at 7: 30," Kira told him. "And it's already quarter to nine."

"I know," Athrun said. "I've already told Yzak and Dearkka of the situation- as vaguely as I can."

"What about the others?" Kira asked. "Lunamaria? Shinn? Meyrin?"

"I think it's best if they don't know," Athrun answered. "If there really _is_ a threat then we should act passive- as if nothing's happened."

"To do that," Kira cut in. "The less people who knows, the better."

Athrun nodded. "Exactly. We still don't know who we're dealing with. I think it's best to just play safe."

"Raise security in secret?"

"Yeah, things are definitely getting worse," Athrun said.

* * *

"Finally!" Athrun and Kira heard a female voice ring through the hollow halls of the command center which was by the way, in December City, if you don't know yet, that is.

It was Shiho.

"I thought you didn't receive the message," Shiho walked towards the two men.

"Bring us up to speed," Athrun ordered.

"James, Sato and Campbell had been doing research and had found only a few affirmatives." Shiho held out a few papers. "Here are the reports. Ashton, Trump, Lexus and Blunt had been monitoring but they haven't found anyone or anything suspicious. I've told my subordinates to raise security almost everywhere- the council, December City, Aprilius and your home and Kira's."

"Alright," Athrun pursed his lips. "Do we have a lead?"

"This," By then, the trio had reached a room that seemed to be the interrogating room. The guard there saluted them and punched the code and opened the door. Shiho handed Athrun a phone which was on the table. "We've traced it but found no matches. We were able to record some conversations though."

"What's the voice?" Kira looked at the phone.

"Can't track it," Shiho leaned at the table. "The bastards used a voice changer."

"Any codenames?" Athrun narrowed his eyes.

"Yeah," Shiho looked extremely vexed and pissed off at the same time. "They were smart enough to not use their real names."

"What about the coordinates?" Athrun started walking towards the control room where research was held and was followed by the two.

"Wendell," Shiho called as they entered the room. "The coordinates?"

Adam Wendell stood up and saluted. "Sir, the coordinates cannot be defined. It seemed the signal jumped from one coordinate to another."

"What the hell?" Athrun clenched his fist. "Satellite?"

"None," Shiho replied.

"Damn,"

"Why'd you say that the two princesses are in danger?" Kira asked, not using the real names, knowing that Shiho understood who he was talking about.

Shiho sighed. "Here's one of the conversations we were able to record." She threw two headphones at Athrun and Kira's way which they caught flawlessly. They wore it. "Randall, play."

Athrun and Kira heard a hoarse voice which was most definitely done with the use of a voice changer.

"_Do you have the targets locked?"_

"_Yes," This time, it was a shrill voice that spoke. _

"_Excellent, keep them monitored…everything's going exactly as planned so far."_

"_Yeah, hey, after this, everything'll be ok, right?"_

"_Yes, as long as those two women are gone…everything will be back to normal. So get your ass on the job!"_

"_Yes, sir!"

* * *

_

After hearing the conversation, they went to Athrun's office so that they'll have some privacy. It's not that they don't trust their subordinates; it's just to play safe.

"So, you think that the 'two women' these guys were referring to are my sister and my wife?" Kira asked.

"Who else?" Shiho said. "He said that 'As long as these two women are gone, everything will be back to normal', right? Who are the two women that helped changed and influenced the world? I think the answer's more than obvious already."

"Shiho's right," Athrun agreed. "But if the targets really are the two of them, why?"

"God, this is just like what happened when Durandal attempted to kill Lacus four years ago," And then it hit Kira. "You guys…you don't think…?"

"It's kind of like that," Athrun said. "And yet it's not. _Everything will be back to normal_."

"No," Shiho shook her head. "I, on the other hand think that it's more like what happened with Junius Seven."

"It's possible," Athrun nodded. "So the motive…"

"Revenge?" Kira said uncertainly.

"That's what I was thinking." Shiho crossed her arms.

"Killing them might bring the world into more chaos," Athrun clasped his hands, sitting on his desk.

"The Earth Alliance might be the ones behind this," Shiho suggested. "The only thing they want is a 'blue and pure world' and what Cagalli and Lacus did…if you were in their place, what would you do?"

"Yes," Kira nodded. "I'd like to kill them. Damn, some people just don't learn."

"That _would_ be their mentality," Athrun said. "But I don't want another war."

"Who does?" Shiho muttered. "What do we do now? Let's say it's true. Cagalli and Lacus _are_ in danger. Someone _wants_ to kill them. The Earth Alliance guys infiltrate December City like the extendeds did two years ago. They knew where Lacus and Cagalli are- it's easy. Shoot them at the head and the world plunges into chaos yet again."

Athrun sighed. "Two women are killed and everything is lost…I guess we'll just have to do the next best thing. Heighten security, monitor PLANT and Orb, as well as other countries 24/7. Lay low and be passive. Stock up on machinery and guns. Act as if nothing happened and keep on doing research."

"And trust no one?" Kira stated.

"Yeah," Athrun nodded. "Shiho, can we contact Kisaka in Orb?"

"Inconspicuously?"

"As much as possible."

"I don't how much I could do but I'll tell him of the situation," Shiho said, taking on the task. "Do you need it ASAP?"

"It'd be better to do it at my house…if things get worse, we might have to tell the others about this," Athrun stood up. "And that's what I'm afraid of."

Kira sighed. "It's the inevitable."

"I'll tell the crew to keep quiet about this then?" Shiho walked towards the door.

"Yes."

"Alright," Shiho nodded and walked out of the room.

"Two years ago," Kira started. "I would've wondered why anyone would want to kill Lacus but now…maybe I shouldn't have let her be the chairwoman."

"There's nothing we could do, Kira," Athrun said. "Both Cagalli and Lacus…they are needed in this world and I have no doubt in my mind that they already knew that in one point of their lives, this would happen."

"But could it really be the work of the EA?" Kira asked. "For all we know…this could also be the work of some guys who still believe Durandal."

"Or my father,"

"There's also something that's been bothering me…" Kira trailed off.

"The phone?" Athrun guessed.

"Yes, why would they leave something like that?" Kira shook his head. "With the technology we have right now, there was no way we couldn't track them."

"Yeah, they were taking a risk," Athrun nodded. "But they're also good. For someone to be able to make the signal jump from one coordinate to another…"

"It's a trap, isn't it?" Kira said. "And Shiho…"

"I'm sure Shiho knows that too," Athrun said. "But there's also another possibility."

"What?"

"There's a spy on the loose,"

"In ZAFT?" Kira asked. "Here?"

"Not just here, Kira," Athrun told him. "Orb, Aprilius, the council…"

"In short, everywhere?" Kira asked incredulously.

"Exactly," Athrun said. "That's why…"

"We can't trust anyone," Kira concluded. "So we might have to take matters in our own hands now."

"Yes."

* * *

A dark cloaked figure roamed about the streets of December City. Even if it's midnight, the city's still active, being famous for its night markets.

The lights were shining but this went unnoticed by the figure. His phone rang and he got it out of his pocket.

He saw the name of the caller ID and grinned. He pressed the 'answer' button.

"Sir, everything is ready over here," the voice said.

Even with the voice changer and the codename, the man already knew who his caller was. "Good. Now all we need is _that thing_. I'll handle that."

"Yes, of course, Sir," his caller replied.

And the phone line went dead.

The man grinned evilly. _Finally_.

_Both of you…Cagalli Yula Athha and Lacus Clyne…I'll make you pay for what you've done.

* * *

_

**My vocabulary regarding military stuff isn't wide so I hope the words I used will suffice. Hope you guys find this chapter interesting and that you understood their conversations.**

**Feel free to criticize me and I assure you that no offense will be taken but instead will be regarded as a way to improve my writing. Please don't flame the characters or the author though. As much as I dislike Meyrin, I find no faults in her aside from liking Athrun. So far, from my perspective, I've gotten no comments like those and I appreciate all of you for doing that. I've gotten criticisms in my reviews and I appreciate them greatly.**

**As always, please review!**


	14. Chapter 12

**Lost Love **

* * *

**Chapter 12**

Meyrin laid on her bed. Yes, _hers_. Not _theirs_.

She and Athrun never slept together in bed, never made love.

Yes, they held hands.

Yes, they hugged.

Yes, they went on dates.

Yes, they kissed.

But never did Meyrin made love to him nor him to her.

Athrun, Kira and Shiho arrived a little over past one. Everyone waited for their arrival, nervous and worried. All of them explained the situation from the rumors to the phone to the conversations and to the impending danger on Lacus Clyne and Cagalli Yula Athha.

It was natural, she thought, that Kira would be worried and she was surprised that he didn't collapse out of being too occupied on raising the security. It was understandable. The victims, or at least the people who were being threatened were his wife and his sister, neither of whom he couldn't live without.

And the uneasiness in Athrun's voice wasn't at all hard to notice. She knew he cared for both of them. Heck, he was involved with both of them romantically. And Meyrin couldn't help but feel hurt with the thought. She knew he loved Lacus and Cagalli. With Lacus, she could rest more peacefully. After all, she _is_ happily married and Athrun was joyous of that fact.

But Cagalli…well, she was in another category.

Athrun loved her, no _loves_ her even. Meyrin knew that and it hurt. Terribly.

He didn't want to leave her. He never did.

He was just afraid that he'd ruin Cagalli's life like how he did before. Meyrin was there, she knew what took place...what really happened.

"_Aren't you going back?" she asked, following Athrun._

"_No," he whispered. Meyrin felt a little giddy at that fact, even if she thought she was wrong to think about the situation like that._

"_Why?"_

"_I don't want to ruin her life…" He said in a small voice. "It might be different last time. But this time, things are much complicated and I can't risk doing that to her. She's already got a lot in her hands…I don't want to add to her burden. And besides, with everything that's going on, she's going to need a lot of support and I don't think being with a coordinator will help things."_

"_But you love her…" Meyrin said, opposing her own mind. "And she loves you."_

"_It doesn't matter now, does it?" Athrun faced her with a small smile on his lips and turned around once again, continuing on his stroll._

Meyrin remembered that day as if it was yesterday. It was the end of their relationship, she was sure of that. Very sure, indeed.

But she knew that he still harbored feelings for her. And that was a whole different matter in itself.

For the last two years, she became his secretary. It was a great job. She's with him all the time and she kept track on whatever he was doing everyday.

She sounded like a stalker but she couldn't care less. Yes, Meyrin also wished, desired and hoped. And there were some things that she wanted.

And that was Athrun.

She spent a lot of time with him and him with her but no one thought it was at all out of the ordinary. After all, she _was_ his secretary.

His love life was one to concentrate on if it came to media. Meyrin saw the magazines and newspapers.

Everyone had quite a shock to find out that Athrun Zala's supposed fiancée was actually in a relationship with Kira Yamato. She guessed that was the first time he ever showed himself in an interview. All he wanted to do, however, was to clarify that he and Lacus broke up amicably with no hard feelings and that he and Kira will not 'battle to the death' or 'duel for the love of Lacus Clyne'. He said that he was more than happy with their relationship and he supported them. He wasn't at all jealous of that fact.

And then they asked how he could have accepted this so wholeheartedly. Surely, he resented Kira Yamato for stealing his fiancée.

Seeing it was both Athrun and Lacus who were being interviewed, they answered the question without hesitation. They were never at all in love with each other. And at some points, there may have been the usual infatuation and such but it was a political and arranged engagement and nothing more, aside from friendship and a mutual care and understanding for each other as friends.

Meyrin almost giggled whilst laying on the bed when she remembered Kira frantically calling Athrun at the middle of night, complaining about his mail loading up with hate mails and flames. And there was one time when Athrun-Lacus fans piled up in front of his home shouting curses and insanities and obscenities at him. It was, in all actuality, a funny evening. And Athrun laughed with her even while driving her home.

Meyrin gripped the sheets covering her and shuddered.

They didn't date, not until they were engaged at least. And the engagement…that was another thing too.

People knew that the men were the ones who proposed. But in this case, it was Meyrin's proposal. She had lunch with him just like every other day as a friend and while they were talking, Meyrin looked up and asked, "Athrun, will you marry me?"

Meyrin slapped herself in the face for such a blatant question. She didn't mean it literally. It was just a hypothetical question. And she was actually lucky that he didn't laugh at her stupidity at asking that question.

Athrun stopped at what he was doing and stared at her. "Are-are you serious?"

"No…I mean, hypothetically, will you marry me?" Meyrin said, blushing.

"Oh…" It took some time for Athrun to answer. "Sure, I guess it's ok to marry you."

And Meyrin, although happy, can't help but feel that answer was left hanging, as if mentally saying, 'besides, I left my heart with Cagalli, my one true love…it wouldn't be the worst thing to marry someone that I care about as a friend.'

God, it even hurt just by thinking about it.

And now, after the inquiry of that stupid yet not so stupid question, for Meyrin, that is, they thought that maybe, they'd marry. Then the plans popped up. Lunamaria volunteered to do the wedding planning and a friend of hers offered to do the catering.

Everything seemed so blissful…that is until Cagalli arrived. And with a child.

Meyrin didn't know what to think. Could that girl be Athrun's? She didn't know and it was Cagalli's right and decision whether to tell her or not. Besides, she claimed she was adopted. If she came in, planning to get Athrun back, wouldn't she have just told them the little girl was Athrun's?

_Of course she would_.

And then now, this happened. Meyrin was so confused. Was this fate's way of telling her that she and Athrun were never meant to be together, much less get married?

That, she didn't know as well.

Everything was just so complicated now. She may not know Athrun as much as Kira, Lacus or Cagalli but she knew him enough to know that she wasn't the one he desired or yearned for.

She was the one he was engaged to, true. But she was never the one, was she?

It was pointless to ask that question since she already knew the answer a long time ago. And it hurt. So much.

Maybe, just maybe, if she had met him before Cagalli did, this would be her engagement and she meant her _real_ engagement, not just a way to cover up his feelings, not just a reason as to why he can't go back to the one he truly loves and not just an excuse to deceive himself into thinking that there's someone else for him.

But then, come to think about it, Lacus _did_ meet Athrun way before he met Cagalli and that didn't change the fact that he fell in love, _really_ fell in love with her, even if he was, at that time, engaged to Lacus Clyne.

_It wasn't just a matter of when and where_, Meyrin thought and laughed. _Of course not. Love isn't like that. It never was._

Meyrin started to cry and she felt tears flowing down her cheeks.

It was never me…it was always her. And it will _always_ be her, no matter who he married.

He might have married Meyrin but deep inside, he'll always ask for Cagalli in his heart and no one else, no matter how much Meyrin loved him.

And she always knew that, _always_. She only didn't want to accept it, even now.

Athrun never belonged to her…Destiny was so merciless.

And Meyrin couldn't help but think that she was not even a threat to their relationship, seeing that she never even had a chance with Athrun at all.

Meyrin finally slept that night but her tears were still visible and they shone brightly in the moonlight, revealing her pain in love.

* * *

**I had a lot of fun writing about that part when Meyrin remembered about the time when the PLANTs found out Athrun and Lacus broke up...I always wondered how they will react when they find out that their 'perfect couple' were never in love in the first place...haha, the series never showed that part except for the small scene in the alternate ending when Kira and Lacus hugged in front of everyone. ;)  
**

**Sorry, AthrunLacus fans and to my sibling too who thinks that Athrun was better off with Lacus. ;")**

**As for the chapter itself...well, I know that most Asucaga fans hate and even loathe Meyrin and I was actually one of them, I admit. But sometimes, we fans overlooked the fact that Meyrin might also be hurting inside...as far as I'm concerned (following the series), it was always a one-sided love...Athrun never actually showed any feelings towards Meyrin and imagine how that will feel like.**

**So I thought that I'd do her justice and explain how Meyrin felt in this fic. I hope you guys still liked it and please don't flame me (or any other characters for that matter), hehe...=D**

**Please review!**


	15. Chapter 13

**Lost Love **

* * *

**Chapter 13**

"You're not taking Carina with you?" Lacus tilted her head, motioning to the little blond girl who was playing with one of the stuffed toys Athrun won for her the other day.

"No," Cagalli shook her head, wearing her red wig and putting blue contact lens on her eyes. "She's probably still tired from yesterday and besides, it's safer here."

"And you're risking _your_ life instead?" Milly crossed her arms, sitting on a nearby couch.

"C'mon, it's not like I can't protect myself," Cagalli faced her friends. "I'm just going to look around."

"_With a man_," Milly said, putting more emphasis on the 'man'.

"It's not like it's a bad thing," Cagalli reasoned.

"Well, you, Carina and Athrun _did _just go to an amusement park yesterday…" Lacus pointed out. "Do you even _want_ to go out with this man?"

"He's just a friend who's showing me around," Cagalli said. "It's no big deal."

"You do know that any one of us could do that, right?" Milly questioned. "Luna, Yzak, Dearkka, Shiho?"

"You sounded just like Athrun," Cagalli made a face.

"This _is_ your safety we're talking about," Milly paused. "And also…wait, you're not trying to make Athrun _jealous_, are you?"

"No!" Cagalli exclaimed. "I can't believe you'd actually insinuate something like that!"

It's true. She's not making Athrun jealous. At all. She never even considered that fact.

But, maybe…will Athrun _be_ jealous?

_No, no, of course not, Cagalli!_

He's _engaged_, for goodness sake! And besides, she never had any intention on stealing Athrun.

Of course she didn't.

Right now, he's her _friend_. Emphasis on 'friend', by the way.

But of course, her two friends in front pf her didn't believe her.

Great.

Milly shrugged as if saying, "Yes, yes, _of course_ you're not making him jealous!"

And Lacus, well, she just tried to suppress a giggle but in her terms, that's almost as bad as Milly's reaction.

* * *

"So, you're here because…?" Kent took a bite of his cake.

"A wedding," Cagalli said.

"A friend's?"

"Yeah." Cagalli nodded.

"And you've never been to PLANT?" Kent asked.

"Well, I've been to some places…Aprilius, Januarius…just not December City," Cagalli said.

It was true.

They always held meetings at Aprilius, that's for sure and in one occasion, Lacus took her to Januarius for a large exhibition last year.

"Ah," Kent nodded. "So, I'm really showing you around then?"

"Well, I've been to the city square and the amusement park and the ranch, of course…" Cagalli shrugged. "But I've heard there's tons more places here in December City."

"You heard right," Kent grinned, finishing his coffee. "C'mon, let's go."

It was a fun day, Cagalli had to admit, better than she expected. Kent was a great tour guide, too. They went to the December Tower where the view of the city was absolutely breathtaking, the History and Culture of December City Museum which was literally, full of words, the Plaza- a large garden with a biodiversity of flowers and plants, and the December City Memorial- which was Cagalli's request.

"Why do you want to go to the memorial?" Kent asked, driving.

"I just want to pay my respects…" Cagalli answered, looking out of the window. "I was a soldier in both wars, you see."

"Oh," Kent kept quiet for a few seconds.

Cagalli bought three bouquets at a nearby flower shop. She placed one at the general memorial stone (like the one in Orb). She walked along the tomb stones, the names of all that died being engraved in her memory. Thousands of casualties and a lot was hers to blame. She stopped at the middle of two tomb stones where she read two familiar names: Lenore Zala and Patrick Zala.

She probably didn't have the right to do this but she never paid her respects to them at all. And this could be her chance, her one and only chance for that matter. She placed a bouquet on each grave and bowed her head, almost crying.

"I'm so sorry for hurting your son so many times…" she whispered. "I never intended to and it would always be the last thing I'll ever do but I hope you'd understand why I couldn't tell him about his daughter. Maybe I should've brought her here…so that you could see her. You might not like me to be the mother of your grandchild but I'm sure you're watching her and him from up there whoever the mother is…again, I'm sorry."

She stayed there for a few minutes, trying to make her tears go away before going back to Kent. Luckily, he decided to not follow her. It would've been weird if he did.

"You took quite a long time up there," Kent commented.

"Really?" Cagalli said, glancing back at the memorial. "I never realized. Sorry."

"It's alright," Kent waved a hand. "You ok, though? Did you know them? The ones you visited, I mean."

"No, not exactly," Cagalli admitted. "It's just that I knew their son…he was one of my comrades during the war and I guess I just wanted to visit them at least once for his sake."

"Oh," Kent nodded, seemingly understanding her feelings.

They drove towards the café that they met in earlier and Cagalli was surprised to see someone waiting for her, as though he knew where she had been all along.

"Athrun?" she gasped. He looked as though he's mad…no, saying he's mad was an understatement. He was extremely vexed and furious.

"What?" Kent leaned in.

"Oh, nothing," Cagalli shook her head. "Look, today's a great day and I had a lot fun, so thanks."

"But that still isn't enough to ask you out?" Kent tried.

"No, sorry," Cagalli smiled sadly. "I hope you'd understand though…let's meet again if there's a chance."

"Sure thing," Kent nodded. "Oh, and are you sure you're not with that blue-haired guy? He seems pretty pissed off."

"Oh, no, no," Cagalli said. "Thanks again."

And she walked towards Athrun's direction, not knowing what might happen to her in the next few minutes. Athrun had always been unpredictable.

"Hey, what are you doi- ahh!" Athrun grabbed her wrist, not saying a word and stalked off to the direction of his car.

Cagalli was confused and angered by this and so she pulled her wrist free from Athrun's grasp. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"What do _you_ think you're doing?" Athrun retorted.

"What am _I_ doing? I just went around with a friend!" Cagalli hissed back. "Is that wrong?"

"Do you even _know_ what you're doing?" Athrun asked incredulously. "Right now, you're in danger! You went out without even telling anyone!"

"Milly and Lacus knew!" Cagalli defended.

"Get in the car, will you?" Athrun moved to the driver's seat. "We're attracting too much attention."

"Well, who's fault was that?" But Cagalli nevertheless complied.

Athrun started driving. "This is your safety we're talking about! You can't trust anyone, Cagalli, especially at your situation right now."

"If it's my safety we're talking about, then you know as well as I do that I can protect myself!" Cagalli defended.

"Don't you understand?" Athrun exclaimed. "This isn't just about you! You can protect yourself, I know that much but one false move and everything's ruined! Yours and Lacus' safety for one matter and what about the others? Milly, Shiho, Kira, Yzak, Dearkka, Shinn, Luna, Meyrin? What about your daughter?"

Well, that stung. "This is so typical of you and you know it!"

"So what?" Athrun said, exasperated. "I'm just trying to protect you, damn it!"

"Protect me?" Cagalli said. "Protect me from what? A guy who's being nice? Yeah, he's _so_ dangerous! If you're suspecting him so much then tell me! Tell me, what was suspicious about him? Is he suspicious because he liked me? You think I'm not likable that people would be suspicious if they _do_ like me?"

"You know that's not what I meant," Athrun said in a softer tone.

"Answer," Cagalli closed her eyes. "Just answer the damned question! Why are you so suspicious of him?"

"It's- that's…" Athrun gave a sharp sigh. "Fine. I admit there's nothing suspicious about him. Alright? He seems very nice."

"Then…" Cagalli started. "If you think that, then why are you acting like this, what's the point?" Then Milly's words earlier ran through her mind. It was a bold thing to do and arrogant, as well but what other reasons could there be? "Are you- are you _jealous_?"

"Yes."

Cagalli's head snapped up and her breath hitched.

What?

_What?_

No, she must have heard wrong. "Pardon?"

"Yes," Athrun stopped the car, parking it at a secluded place. "I'm jealous." He admitted.

"You…" Cagalli was at a loss of words. "…why?"

Athrun looked at Cagalli, capturing her gaze, giving her a bittersweet smile, "Do I really need to answer that? When you already know the answer?"

"If…if…" Cagalli shook her head, her eyes brimming with tears. "Then why? Why are you doing this?"

"I don't know," Athrun sighed. "I thought…I thought she could do it…make me forget you and then you came along with a kid…I thought you hooked up or something…"

Cagalli looked disgusted. "You seriously thought I'd do that?"

"No, but, what was I supposed to think?"

"This…" Cagalli bit her lip. "You're making this harder for both of us…"

"I know," Athrun bowed his head. "I know and I'm sorry."

"Someone's going to get hurt, either way, Athrun, and you know it," Cagalli told him, her voice cracking a little. "Be it me, be it you or be it Meyrin…someone's going to get hurt."

"I just," Athrun ran a hand through his hair. "I never thought this would happen, of all things…it's just so…damn it!"

"Why?" Cagalli shook her head, her tears threatening to fall. "Everything…"

They were both silent for a while. It started to rain and the only sounds heard were the pitter patter of the rain drops falling on the windshield.

"Cagalli," Athrun broke the intense silence. "Did you…did you ever love me?"

"Love?" Cagalli turned to him. "I did more than that. I may have never showed it but I did love you…no, I _do_ love you, until now. Have you…" Cagalli took a deep breath. "What about you?"

"I never stopped, Cagalli," Athrun answered, without hesitating. "I never stopped loving you."

"Then this…"

"I just wanted to run," Athrun said in a small voice. "I wanted to get away from it all- the pain, the hurt, the regret…I wanted to forget you."

"Did it work?" Cagalli closed her eyes, leaning back on the seat.

Athrun chuckled sadly, "No, it didn't and I doubt it will ever will."

"Then what are we doing right now?" Cagalli asked, tired and confused.

"Huh," Athrun sighed, angry with himself. "Why is it that all the decisions that I've made were all wrong and stupid?"

"Athrun…"

"I'm sorry…everything…it's all my fault."

"No…"

"If I hadn't," Athrun shook his head. "All of this…"

"I should go," Cagalli said. "Go back to Orb…with Carina and-."

"No."

"What?" Cagalli looked at him.

"Please," Athrun said softly. "Don't go."

"Athrun, we can't," Cagalli argued. "This isn't right."

"I know, but please, don't go," Athrun pleaded. "I can't bear it. I can't stand losing you again…"

"Sacrifices should be made, Athrun," Cagalli said helplessly, wanting to defy her own thoughts and feelings. "Meyrin…she's going to get hurt, Athrun…"

"Damn it!" Athrun gripped the wheel. "Why? Why is everything so complicated?"

"I'm sorry," Cagalli shook her head, her hand on the door. "It will always be you, Athrun, no matter what, it will always be you."

As Cagalli made a move to open the door, Athrun tightened his grip on the wheel and made a last attempt, "Cagalli!"

* * *

"It's all carried out," A man in a black cloak said to the person he's speaking to. "Tell the others…Tell them that after tonight, everything will be back to normal."

"Sir!"

* * *

It had already stopped raining and Cagalli and Athrun sat in the car, both a bit disheveled.

"This…" Cagalli started. "This never happened, right?"

"No," Athrun shook his head, admitting defeat. "Sacrifices must be made."

"I hope you'll understand," Cagalli closed her eyes. "Everything that happened here is just a one time thing…just a moment of weakness…"

"Yeah," Athrun agreed.

"In two weeks, you'll be married to Meyrin," Cagalli said, as if dictating their future. "But by that time, Carina and I will be in Orb."

"Everything will be the same, won't it?" Athrun asked.

Cagalli nodded carefully. "Yes, except another couple got married."

Athrun shut his eyes tight.

"That's all there is to it," Cagalli concluded and waited for a few more seconds. "Goodbye, Athrun."

Athrun didn't attempt to stop her now. Cagalli opened the door and he saw her walk and at some points, run on the sidewalk. Athrun slammed his fist on the window of the car. "Damn it!"

Cagalli ran and thank God she had a good sense of direction. She reached the Zala mansion in no time and entered the threshold, panting. She went into her room and after she shut the door closed, she slid down, her back against the door and she wept.

* * *

"Cagalli?" Cagalli heard Lacus' voice from the other side of the room. "Are you ok? We saw you come in and you were…Cagalli, please, let us in."

Cagalli had already gotten her luggage bags and started to put her clothes as well as Carina's inside.

"Cagalli!" She heard Milly's yell. "Please! Open the door!"

"If there's a problem," Shiho spoke next. "Then tell us! Don't do this to yourself."

Yes, they were the ones who knew the whole truth. What harm will it do telling them what happened earlier?

Cagalli, her eyes all red and swollen, opened the door and saw the faces of her worried friends.

"Cagalli!" Lacus exclaimed. "What happened?"

"Please, come in," Cagalli said softly.

"Why the hell are you crying?" Milly demanded. "And what's with those bags?"

"Are you going home, Cagalli?" Shiho asked worriedly.

"Yes," Cagalli nodded.

"But why?" Lacus held her friend's hand. "You were doing ok! Everything's fine! What happened today?"

"It's Athrun…" Cagalli swallowed.

Shiho narrowed her eyes. "What _about_ Athrun, Cagalli?"

"He didn't do anything to you, did he?" Milly asked frantically.

"No," Cagalli shook her head. "We…we had a fight."

"A fight?" Lacus echoed.

"Yes, and that's not all," Cagalli hung her head then slumped on the floor helplessly.

"Cagalli!" Milly cried. "_What happened?_"

"He and I…we…Athrun and I…" Cagalli stammered.

"What did you guys do?" Shiho prompted, her voice even and patient but her mind was eager for answers.

"We…" Cagalli took a deep breath and blurted out, "We made love."

* * *

**I was supposed to post this yesterday but my internet crashed. Ergo...**

**So, by Cagalli's last statement and Athrun and Cagalli's conversation, I think I kind of made Athrun into a cheating bastard...so sorry for that.**

**I mean, believe me, I love Athrun and to think that I made him cheat (even if it wasn't on Cagalli), well, I'm pretty evil for doing that. But don't flame me!**

**I just thought, 'So, 2 people who are in love are quarreling and despite their complicated situation, what do most couples do when they fight? A kiss? A hug? What Cagalli revealed in her last statement?'**

**But, anyway, especially for Athrun and Asumey fans, I still hope that you all enjoyed it...Please review!**


	16. Chapter 14

**Lost Love **

* * *

**Chapter 14**

Athrun gripped the wheel, "Cagalli!"

Cagalli stopped at her tracks and swallowed. She didn't want to leave him…no, she didn't and she never wanted to.

But what was she supposed to do? He was _engaged_.

Sure, he just told her that he loves her but that still didn't change the fact that he's about to be eternally committed to another woman and what they're doing, or what they might be doing in a few hours, was wrong.

Cagalli won't be a woman who steals another girl's man. Well, technically, Athrun _was_ hers first but that's not the point!

_Maybe,_ Cagalli thought, _maybe it wouldn't be that wrong. Besides, it's probably just a one time thing; it's alright to give in to weaknesses once in a while, right?_

_Of course it is._

Cagalli turned around, tears falling, "Athrun…"

They looked at each other with a feeling of longing. Everything's all messed up and it didn't matter whose fault it was. The fact that the result was this did not change anything. It didn't change the situation or the problem or the complicated matters.

But at that moment, the same things were going through their mind. They wanted each other and lusted for one another. It was wrong, yes, but this could be their only chance to feel the love one more time. And they were not just going to let it pass by.

Not again.

Athrun lunged for Cagalli, pushing her against the door of the car. Cagalli wasn't surprised though. She responded with as much passion as he was giving her. She wrapped an arm around his neck while a hand fisted on his hair. Athrun cupped her face with much need.

The love, pain and suffering burst through in their soul-searing kiss. They went through too much and this was one way of getting the load of their shoulders.

It was a fantasy- what was happening that moment. And they accepted it.

They knew they couldn't run from their duties. And if it weren't for their respective responsibilities, then they would've had their happy ending ages ago.

But reality was never on their side. And when they thought that they've already got it going, it would soon catch up to them- reminding them both of their status and what they symbolize in this world.

However, in that moment, there wasn't anything standing in their way. There were no responsibilities, media, interviews, paparazzi and wars. There were no boundaries or invisible walls keeping them apart.

No, that time, it was just him and her.

He wasn't Athrun Zala, Commander of the ZAFT Forces and legendary pilot of the Justice and she wasn't Chief Representative Cagalli Yula Athha of the Orb Union.

No, it was just him and her.

He was Athrun and she was Cagalli.

They weren't tied to duties. They weren't committed to their respective countries. They weren't Coordinator and Natural.

They were just a boy and a girl who happened to fall in love.

And despite their present circumstances, they wanted that make-believe reality to last a bit longer, _just a little longer_.

And then for a time during their love-making, they weren't Athrun and Cagalli. They weren't you and me.

He was she and she was he.

They were one.

* * *

"Stay," Lacus, Milly and Shiho insisted.

"Why?" Cagalli asked. "What for?"

"Well, just stay," Milly shrugged.

"Even if it's just one more night, Cagalli," Shiho used her puppy dog eyes on her friend who and the two other girls in the room, never knew she had the ability to do.

"You can do the puppy dog eyes trick?" Lacus asked.

"And you're good too," Milly agreed. "You made your eyes look all glassy."

Shiho snorted. "How did you guys think I was able to make Yzak bend to my will?"

"Good point," Lacus nodded.

"Well, back to the subject," Milly said, facing Cagalli who remained quiet but at the very least, stunned at her friend's revelation. "Please Cagalli?"

"Milly, I-," Cagalli said and sighed. "I don't know…this week had already been hard and I don't know if I could take much longer."

"Alright, we won't stop you," Lacus said and all three girls glanced up.

"Lacus!" Milly exclaimed.

"You…" Shiho seemed confused.

"On one condition," Lacus stood up. "Stay for tonight, at least."

"But-," Cagalli said in an attempt to protest.

"Just for one night," Lacus said. "We're your friends, Cagalli and all we want is for you to find your own happiness and just know that we'll always be there for you."

(But inside, '_Damn_ _it, Cagalli, you and Athrun made love! Why the heck are you leaving?_' And I repeat, _Lacus_ said that, or rather thought that.)

"Yeah, Cagalli," Milly agreed. "Despite what _we_ want, the one thing we want most is that you'd be happy."

"So, just think about it, ok?" Shiho said. "If leaving would make you happy, then do it. Just make sure you're _really_ happy with that decision, alright?"

"And while you're thinking," Milly grabbed the bags. "Let me take these bags away until you've come up with a conclusion. Tonight might be the last night I'd see you for God knows how long."

* * *

A pair of curious green eyes peered through the oak door.

Cagalli sensed the feeling and despite crying (still), narrowed her eyes and glared at the direction with her face softening at the moment when she saw who it was.

"Mommy?" Carina stepped forward. "Why are you crying?"

"I'm not crying, Darling," Cagalli denied. "I was just…thinking."

"No, you were crying." Carina argued. "Did someone hurt Mommy?"

"No, no," Cagalli shook her head. "Come here, Sweetie."

Carina silently went towards her mother and hugged her. "Please don't cry Mommy…because if Mommy's crying, then Carina will be sad and will also cry." She sniffed.

"No, don't cry, Sweetie," Cagalli hugged her. "Carina…"

"Hm?" Carina looked up from her mother's embrace.

"Would you like to have a father?"

"A daddy?" Carina was deep in thought. "Yes! But I don't need one! I have Mommy's love that it's fine to not have a daddy!"

Cagalli looked at her and tears welled up once again. She hugged the little child closely to her. "Thank you…I'm sorry."

Her last line was said in a hushed voice.

* * *

"So you're staying one last night here?" Milly leaned on the door.

"Yes," Cagalli nodded.

"And you're shooting two birds with one stone here?" Shiho asked.

"Yeah."

"To make Carina and yourself happy…" Lacus said thoughtfully. "Well that seems fair."

"So, let me get this straight," Milly lifted a hand. "We're going out- the four of us and you're giving Carina to Athrun for the rest of the night so they'll have yet another 'father-daughter bonding time'?"

She got a nod.

"Alright then!" Milly raises her fist. "Let's go shopping!"

And all the ladies laughed.

* * *

"I've got a bad feeling about this…" Shiho muttered once they returned.

"Huh?" Cagalli and the others looked at her.

"Is there something wrong, Shiho?" Yzak asked worriedly.

"No, it's just…nothing," Shiho shook her head and sighed.

"She's right, though," Lunamaria mused. "With everything's going on…why don't we take extra measures?"

"Sis?" Meyrin looked up.

"Yeah, why don't we sleep together?" Luna suggested.

"Luna?" Shinn asked. "Are you _crazy_? That will be even _more _suspicious!"

"No, I don't mean that _all_ of us will sleep together in _one_ room. That's just insane!" Luna pointed out. "Let's say, two each in one room? Three people tops?"

"Sure, Lunamaria's got a point," Kira agreed. "We could sleep together, two in each room…three if necessary so that at least when something happens, the other could watch their partner's back."

"I second the motion," Dearkka said, grinning.

"And we could have Haro on the look out," Lacus clasped her hands. "He was the one that alerted us that time two years ago!"

"Alright then," Athrun said. "Let's do that."

And so they did.

Cagalli and Shiho slept in one room; Dearkka and Milly in another while Luna and Shinn spent the night together. Kira and Lacus, with Yzak in the next room, took their rest the way it had always been and Athrun, Meyrin and little Carina shared another room.

_When everyone had left, Athrun and Cagalli remained._

"_Athrun?" Cagalli said. "Could I ask a favor?"_

"_As long as I could accomplish it," Athrun stated._

"_Sleep with Carina tonight, will you?" Cagalli asked._

"_What? Why?" Athrun was stunned._

"_Well, not that I doubt Shiho's skills but with Carina around me and when worst comes to worst, I just thought that she'd be safer with you," Cagalli explained. "I mean it's ok if you don't want to…"_

"_It's alright," Athrun said. "Meyrin and I will take care of her. You can trust me."_

"_Yeah," Cagalli nodded and smiled. "I know I can."_

Cagalli shook her head. It was indeed a lot safer if she's with Athrun, no offense to Shiho's abilities in protecting both Athhas. But, she still felt uneasy about this whole situation and sleeping with Carina _did_ make her calm down.

"It's ok to feel nervous, you know," Shiho said, reloading her gun. "You're a mother and no matter who the protector is, you'd still be worried. That's normal."

"Shiho…" Cagalli lowered her eyes. "I hope you're not-."

"It's fine, Cagalli, honestly," Shiho held her hand and Cagalli knew that the girl was speaking the truth. "You trusted me with your life and that's an honor itself. I understand your uneasiness over Carina's life but she's your daughter and letting her father take care of her, even if he didn't know of the blood relation, would probably be the best choice- both for her and your nervousness."

"Thank you," Cagalli said.

* * *

There were at least two dozen masked men with shotguns and knives. It was in the middle of the night and it was the perfect time to accomplish their goal.

"You know where the other is," someone, presumably the leader, spoke up. "I'll take care of the blond…I've got a score to settle with that bitch."

"Sir!"

"Kill anyone who gets in the way and do not, I repeat, do not let them escape." The same man spoke once again.

"Sir!"

Their footsteps were hardly audible and they moved in complete stealth, though not enough for Haro not to detect them.

"Haro! Haro!" It said. "I won't allow this! I won't allow this!"

Yzak and Dearkka were the first ones to hear the robot. They took their guns and put some clothes on.

"Milly!" Dearkka hissed, rocking the sleeping woman. "Wake up! They're here!"

Milly woke up and at the revelation, her eyes widened. "No!"

"Get dressed and be prepared. Hurry!" her boyfriend ordered.

Then they heard a shot rang throughout the halls. By that time, all the others woke up and fastened themselves for what was happening.

Yzak was the one who fired the shot, killing someone who aimed a gun at the sleeping Lacus. Kira and his wife got dressed and followed Yzak with Kira having a gun himself, with the safety off, mind you.

Shinn, Luna, Dearkka and Milly met at an intersection and moved together, with each of them, excluding Milly, holding a gun for defense. They shot a few soldiers, killing them effectively.

On the other hand, Athrun and Meyrin were at a loss but nevertheless prepared for the ambush quickly and searched for the lost child. _Carina was missing._

Shiho, though alert, was one second late. She readied herself but the guy was too fast. She shot her gun but the bullet didn't hit him. The shock of that gave the attacker an advantage. He lunged in for her, punching her on the stomach, rendering her useless and unconscious.

"Shiho!" Cagalli yelled and prepared to face the attacker, knowing she'd have to deal with him herself.

But the fact that her friend lay unconscious on the side distracted her and just as easily as the man went for Shiho, he attacked Cagalli with the same trick but didn't give much effort on the punching.

Cagalli held her stomach, gripping it in pain and agony. "What do you want?" She panted.

"Isn't it obvious?" the man laughed.

She recognized that voice. No, it couldn't be…Athrun was right all along…

"Your life."

"You-." Cagalli stared at him wide-eyed as he aimed his gun. "You're-."

"Hmph," the man scoffed. "You saw it…well, there's no point in hiding now, is there?"

And he took the mask off revealing the face of…

"Kent," Cagalli gasped. "Why…why?"

"You killed her. Both of you did," he spat out. "But you did most of the damage. My fiancee was killed in Januarius 1."

"How…"

"If you had stopped Djibril in Orb then she'd be alive!" he screamed. "And then you and that pink girl became friends and formed peace treaties! You asked us to understand. But can't you understand _our_ feelings? Those naturals- you included- are good for nothing animals who have no right to live! And you killed her…the woman I loved most but now, she's gone! And it's all because of you two! You don't deserve to live!"

"You're wrong…" Cagalli panted. "Killing me or Lacus won't change anything…it won't bring your fiancée back…the only thing...the only thing that will ever come out of this is another war and do you want that?"

"How dare you!" his whole body shook in rage. "You don't know…everything is the naturals' fault! And you…you…you should die!"

As he was about to pull the trigger, a young voice stopped him.

"Mommy!" Carina's eyes showed fear. Carina...why wasn't she with Athrun?

"This child…let's see," Kent gritted his teeth and smiled creepily. "Let's see how you'd like it to see her killed!"

Cagalli eyes widened. "No. No!"

She made a move to run towards her but it was too late.

Another shot rang yet again and Cagalli's eyes were deceiving her, or at least she thought so.

Carina fell backwards and dropped to the floor with her eyes still wide with shock. There was a pool of blood as Cagalli crawled her way towards her, her whole body shaking.

No.

_No._

"Carina!"

* * *

**The first part of the chapter was a flashback...I'm not used to writing those scenes so please bear with me!**

**I guess it wasn't really a surprise about Kent...I really should work on my element of surprise and make the story unpredictable but other than that, I really hope you guys enjoyed it and as always, please review!**


	17. Chapter 15

**Lost Love **

* * *

**Chapter 15**

Once they heard the loud bang of the gun, Athrun and Meyrin jolted up from the bed.

They looked at each other and when they realized that something was missing, they started to panic.

"Where is she?" Meyrin looked around the room frantically. "Carina? Carina?"

"Carina!" Athurn called out desperately. This was so _not_ the time to be playing hide-and-seek. "Damn, she must have gone to Cagalli's room or something! Is she there?"

"No! I can't find her!" Meyrin said nervously. "What do we do?"

"If she's not here then-." A loud bang was heard yet again.

"Damn," Athrun cursed. "We need to get out of this room…Carina's probably somewhere in the house and since she isn't here then we need to go search for her."

"Alright," Meyrin nodded.

In seconds, they were already armed and they ran through the halls. Athrun, being the better gunman, shot all who were in their path. They reached a door that was headed to a shelter- much like the one in Orb.

They saw all of their guests there except Cagalli, Shiho and Carina.

"You guys…" Meyrin panted. "Where are the others?"

"I don't know," Luna said. "They're not with you?"

"What?" Yzak approached. "Shiho…they're still not here?"

"They know where the shelter is, right?" Milly asked worriedly.

"Yes!" Dearkka exclaimed. "I was the one who told them specifically where it is!"

"They're not the type who forgets things, right?" Shinn asked uncertainly.

"No, there's no way that- ," Kira paused and looked up at Athrun.

"Where is she?" Lacus continued Kira's statement. "Where's Carina?"

"We don't know," Athrun admitted. "When we woke up she's gone."

"What?" Everyone exclaimed.

"She's-she's missing?" Milly said, wanting to confirm it.

"We couldn't find her…she must have gone to Cagalli's room or something-," Athrun started.

"CARINA!" they heard someone scream.

They looked back at the hallway, full of corpses of the assassins.

"That's Cagalli's voice!" Lacus grasped Kira's arm. "Something's wrong, Kira!"

"We have to go to her," Yzak said.

"Alright," Kira nodded. "Athrun and Yzak, you guys go and find Cagalli, Shiho and Carina."

The two nodded. "You should go too, Kira!"

"Lacus, I-,"

"Please, I'll be fine, the others will protect me…Cagalli and Shiho might need as much help as they can," Lacus pleaded.

Kira looked from his wife to Athrun and Yzak who paused at the doorway.

"You coming or what?" Yzak asked impatiently. "We don't have much time!"

"Don't worry man," Dearkka patted Lacus on the shoulder.

"We'll protect her, now go!" Shinn said.

"Hurry, Kira!" Luna ordered. "We don't have any time to lose!"

Kira kissed Lacus on the forehead and he, Athrun and Yzak stormed off.

* * *

"CARINA!" Cagalli's eyes widened at the sight of her little daughter, blood rapidly enveloping her. "No…oh, God, no…"

Kent laughed at the scene. "See, now, how do _you_ feel? Losing someone like that? You don't have the right to tell me of what I'm feeling…you never knew. You were nothing but a spoiled, self-centered bit- aah!"

Cagalli lunged at him, knocking him to the floor. "Don't you dare tell me that! _Don't you dare_! You are the one who doesn't understand….not me. Oh, no, I learned my lesson years ago." Cagalli stood up and taunted Kent who stared at her in fear. "One guy takes a life for vengeance and someone takes revenge by killing this guy. How then, will this twisted thinking ever going to bring us peace? Closure? Is this what you want? If it's revenge, then kill me, not the child!

Cagalli's eyes changed. Something in her erupted- an explosion of some sort. She could only feel anger and hatred. "You have no right…she was only a child. She was innocent!"

"And you think my fiancée wasn't?" Kent screamed back. "She was just a civilian! And because of you, she's dead! You have no right to be mad at me for shooting that child!"

"Don't you even _dare_!" Cagalli attacked him with full force. "She doesn't deserve such suffering! She deserved to live!"

"That child of yours…" Kent grinned menacingly. "Do you really think she'd actually live? I've been planning this for two years and I've monitored you during that time. Do you think I don't know? That that bastard of a child is yours and a coordinator's? Zala's even? No one would've let that kid live. Someone's going to kill her…the child of a natural and a coordinator…you've created a monster! And you should be thankful I killed her first! Haha!"

That was it. No more playing nicey-nice.

Cagalli punched him numerous times on the face and stomach and kicked him on the shin. No one gets away with hurting and insulting her daughter, _no one_.

"You're nothing," Cagalli hissed at Kent- all bloodied, dying. "But a murderous bastard who knows nothing!"

And she kept on throwing punches at him and kicking him, screaming all the while.

Shiho fluttered her eyes open slowly and before long, her eyes widened at the sight before her. Cagalli was being violent at a man who was presumably dead. _No_, she thought. _Cagalli, stop!_

Cagalli wasn't that woman up there. No, Shiho had to stop her. Cagalli couldn't be like this, no. No. She heard of the SEED factor. And she also knew that so far only five- Kira, Athrun, Cagalli, Lacus and Shinn- were capable of entering SEED mode. And when that happened, the person would be capable of a whole lot of things- abilities he can never achieve and his limits had reached far from what one can ever expect. And most of all, sometimes, if not controlled, that person would go mad. And seeing the situation, with Carina on the floor, covered in blood, Cagalli's state wasn't stable and she couldn't just stand by and watch her friend go through that pain and anger. No, she needed to stop her. She _had_ to stop her.

Shiho stood up and ran towards Cagalli, bracing her body with her arms. "Stop it, Cagalli!"

But Cagalli didn't stop.

"He's already dead!" Shiho yelled. "Stop it! _Stop it! _This isn't you, Cagalli! Stop it, _please_. This isn't you. _This isn't you_."

* * *

Athrun, Kira and Yzak headed towards Cagalli's room, hearing yells and screams in the process. They weren't prepared to see what was before them when they reached the room.

Cagalli looked at the dead man lying on the floor murderously while Shiho kept on trying to resist her, bracing Cagalli in her arms as tightly as she could.

Kira was the first to spot Carina lying on the floor, blood covering her petite body. Athrun walked towards Cagalli and Shiho immediately handed her to him, going to Yzak's side, calling 911. Athrun and Cagalli kneeled on the floor, with Athrun wrapping his arms around Cagalli who was weeping, thinking her daughter died.

"Cagalli, shh," Athrun soothed the blond, who was gripping his shirt and crying. "It's alright, Cagalli, it's alright…"

"She's…she's gone…" Cagalli wailed.

"I'm sorry," Athrun closed his eyes, tightening his hold on her. "If I was more careful…I should've been able to…I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"She's alive!" Both shot up when they heard Yzak's voice. Kira held on to the little girl and Cagalli could see small intakes of breath coming from her child. She was still alive!

"She's alive, Cagalli," Athrun whispered. "There's nothing to worry about."

Cagalli walked towards her daughter and kneeled before her, taking her into her arms, not minding the blood. "Mommy's sorry…Mommy's so sorry…"

"Cagalli, sorry to interrupt but if we don't get Carina to a hospital this instant, she might not make it," Kira said.

"What?"

"The bullet hit her…on the stomach and with her size, I don't know how much more she could take," Kira explained as Cagalli's eyes widened in shock and fear.

"No…" Cagalli looked at her daughter. "We need to…we need to…"

"Shiho's already called an ambulance," Athrun told her and Yzak's gone to get the others and some first aid…she's going to make it Cagalli, I'm sure."

"Athrun…" Cagalli shook her head and cried once again, clutching her daughter's life in her hands, not wanting to let go, not until her last breath.

Or maybe, not even then.

* * *

**I could only write up until this part...I've got a test coming up...T_T**

**I hope you guys liked it though...I wish it could've been a bit gorier or detailed or something...please tell me what you think of it!**

**Please review!**

**P.S. The revelation's probably in the next chapter...just a heads up. =D**


	18. Chapter 16

**Lost Love **

* * *

**Chapter 16**

"So, what are you going to do now?" Kisaka stared at Cagalli through the screen.

"I don't know," Cagalli shook her head. "It's just…"

"If you let her get hospitalized," Kisaka started. "You know what the consequences are, don't you?"

"Yes," Cagalli said firmly. "But what was I supposed to do? Let her die? If I just let her be, she'd get an autopsy. Either way, the truth's gonna go out in the open. And I'd rather not lose my daughter to the world of the dead."

"Well, she's got a point," Erica Simmons poked her head, making her face visible through the screen. "If the secret's going to get out either way, it'd be more reasonable to keep her child alive, don't you think?"

"I know that," Kisaka said impatiently. "But Cagalli, are you _ready_ for this?"

"It's been two years…" Cagalli stated. "Surely, that's enough time to prepare."

"I guess so," Kisaka sighed.

"Lacus, Milly and Shiho know," Cagalli said in a quiet voice. "And _that_ guy knew too."

"I'm not at all surprised regarding with those three ladies, I suppose you told them?" Kisaka asked and received a nod in response. "Kira…"

"No, he doesn't know and neither does the father," Cagalli admitted.

"Hm," Kisaka pondered for a moment. "Speaking of which, you said that guy who tried to kill you knew about Carina…I'm going to berate these guys at the control center…two years that guy's been tracking us and no one's seen him? Yeah right."

"Don't be so hard on them," Cagalli said softly. "It's also my fault."

Kisaka's eyes softened. "Don't worry; everything's going to be alright."

"I hope so…"

* * *

Cagalli stood there for a few minutes even after Kisaka ended the communication line, thinking what to do next.

They were already in the hospital. The doctors panicked a little seeing as many of the world's most important personalities were at the hospital all at the same time. But they were professionals and therefore did not allow that kind of anxiety to deter them and lose confidence.

Shiho had been the only one who, aside from Carina, was treated. She was fine now though she sported a sling. It seemed that her shoulder was hurt prior to the little incident and the impact from when Kent knocked her out did _tremendous_ to her shoulder.

Carina…well, you could say Cagalli panicked all through out the ride from Athrun's place to the hospital. All the others shared the fear in losing the little one. She was a refreshing change in their pessimistic view of life- at least from what their experiences had recounted. She was a joy to be with and losing her will be like losing a ray of the sun.

The doctors and nurses rushed her towards the emergency room where she was being examined. Cagalli, confused, asked for a private room to talk to Kisaka.

She was led to a sound-proof room and was able to connect to her former bodyguard. She told him of the events and the fact that she was going to have to tell the truth about Carina soon, if not at this moment, in case some things were unavoidable.

Cagalli left the room and walked slowly to where the others were. Kira was the first to approach her.

"What did Mr. Kisaka say?"

"Well, not much…just that I needed to be careful and hope that Carina will be alright," Cagalli lied, well, half-lied anyway. Kisaka did say all those things but that's not everything he told her.

But it was alright, no harm done.

"Oh, are they alright in Orb?" Lacus spoke up.

"They're ok," Cagalli sat down beside Shiho who patted her on the back.

* * *

Minutes passed and Cagalli felt the silence a bit uneasy. The doctor finally came and his expression was unreadable.

Cagalli knew what this meant.

It meant that Carina's wound was too deep, her injury was too serious and that there was no way to save her and they would just have to let her die…

Cagalli felt tears forming at the corner of her eyes. No, she had to be positive and optimistic. The doctors wouldn't tell her that. They were supposed to save lives, right? That's their job, no matter how impossible it seems to accomplish that job. Right?

_Right?_

Cagalli took a deep breath as did those around her. Once the doctor came forward, all had risen and huddled around the middle-aged man.

"Doctor?" Athrun prompted. "How is she?"

"Well, we'll have to perform surgery," The doctor informed.

"S-surgery?" Cagalli repeated.

"Yes, Representative Athha," The doctor said. "I'm afraid a surgery is required. You see, she was shot in the abdomen and lucky for her, the bullet didn't hit any vital organs."

"But…" Shinn trailed off.

"But seeing as how she's young and considering her petite size as well as her genetic type, I cannot guarantee her survival," the doctor continued.

"Cannot guarantee?" Milly asked. "What do you mean?"

"Surgery is easy…" the doctor looked at all of them. "On a normal coordinator, that is."

This was it.

Everyone gasped. "What? A normal coordinator?"

"So what does that mean?" Meyrin asked. "Carina isn't normal?"

"From what I've seen, yes."

"How so?" Luna narrowed her eyes, not believing what the doctor had just told them.

"Well, this young girl is different…" The doctor explained.

"On the outside, she looks like a coordinator…her mental and physical abilities are that of a coordinator's as well," The doctor started. "But there was something wrong. Her body doesn't work like a normal coordinator's. I mean, I could perform surgery on her, no problem. Her internal organs aren't any different."

"If that's the case, then what exactly _is_ the problem?" Yzak asked, confused.

"She's not all coordinator," the doctor revealed. "That's my hypothesis. I'll need second opinion regarding this matter but from what I can gather, it seems as if the young lady has the body of both natural and coordinator."

"Natural and coordinator?" Dearkka asked. "Is that possible?"

"Well, the little girl's our proof," the doctor sighed. "She's a coordinator but she is also a natural though her coordinator abilities overshadow those of her natural abilities, making it look like as if she's a coordinator."

"Wait a minute, let me get this straight," Kira raised a hand. "So you're saying that Carina is half coordinator and half natural?"

"In simpler terms, yes," the doctor nodded. "That's exactly what I'm saying."

"Cagalli?" Kira turned to his sister. "You didn't know about this?"

Cagalli was shell shocked, to be honest.

She expected the doctor to say along the lines of 'I'm sorry but we won't be able to save her because her wound is too big' or something like that.

She never knew…how…

She always thought that Carina was a full coordinator. It never crossed her mind that she was half and half. Carina was a bright young child and comparing her abilities to that of Kira when he was young, well, Carina's not that different.

But thinking about it, Cagalli _did_ remember the few times when she thought Carina seemed to act just like her. She shrugged those moments off. After all, she was her daughter; wouldn't it be just right that Carina inherited some aspects of Cagalli's? It sure didn't seem to be that big of a deal.

"Cagalli?" Kira called a second time and Cagalli snapped out of her trance.

"I never knew…"

"It's understandable, Lady Athha," the doctor said.

"But that aside, the surgery _can_ be performed, right?" Athrun asked.

"Well, there's another problem," The doctor told them.

"What?"

"Blood."

"She-she didn't lose much, did she?" Shiho cried.

"Well, she only lost an adequate amount but again, considering her size," The doctor shook his head. "I cannot guarantee anything."

"What is the problem with regards to blood?" Shinn inquired. "Surely, you have a blood bank…"

"It's not that," The doctor pointed out. "Seeing as she's unique with regards to her genetic type, the safest way to give her blood is to give her blood from someone she's closely related to."

"But she's adopted!" Meyrin exclaimed.

"No," Cagalli said. "Me…I'm her…"

Lacus, Milly and Shiho held their breaths. This was it.

This was it.

This was the moment.

This was the moment of truth.

"I'm her mother," Cagalli said and everyone faced her.

"Representative, I know that you are her mother but…" The doctor started.

"No, you don't understand!" Cagalli told him. "What I'm trying to say is…what I'm trying to say is that she is my daughter, my…my biological daughter."

Gasps filled the air and after recovering from his shock, the doctor looked at Cagalli pitifully. "I apologize, Representative, but her blood is of a coordinator's and your blood types don't even match…and if we add your blood, it might become unhealthy…so if you could locate the father of your child, surely…"

"There's no need to," Cagalli clenched her fist. Lacus, seeing the tension and nervousness of her friend, held Cagalli's clenched fist, silently telling her that her friends were here with her and that everything will be ok.

Cagalli took a deep breath and looked at Lacus with a grateful glance who nodded encouragingly. "He's…already here."

"Well, if that's the case…!" The doctor suddenly said with much life. "Then without further a due… "

"Athrun," Cagalli whispered into the silent atmosphere.

Athrun looked at her, a mix of emotions present on his face. "What?"

"What?" the rest echoed.

"Athrun…you're the father…" Cagalli lowered her eyes. "Please, do it…save our child…if you don't want to accept that fact then do it for a child who was only innocent and didn't deserve this kind of suffering."

Cagalli was crying by now. "Please…"

Athrun couldn't say anything. He was shocked. He was hurt. He was confused.

What Cagalli had just said…how was that possible?

There was no way that…but, they _did_ make love that night…and Carina _did _resemble him and Cagalli. And if what the doctor said was true, then it _did_ make sense that Carina would be half coordinator and half natural.

But still.

He couldn't believe it…Carina was _his daughter_?

* * *

**So, I hope that's a good revelation...**

**Sorry for not updating as fast as I used to. I had this chapter in my mind for like days but I just couldn't write it. I had been so busy with high school...aside from this, I still had to write the script for the class play and there's the investigatory project for science and you know, all those high school activities.**

**Alright, I'm blabbing now.**

**Well, anyway, I hope you all enjoyed this! Please review!**


	19. Chapter 17

**Lost Love **

* * *

**Chapter 17**

Cagalli sat in one of the private rooms of the hospital. She sat there, holding Carina's hand which had an IV. The lower part of Carina's face was covered with an oxygen mask. She laid there in the hospital bed, sleeping, all wrapped up in thick blankets.

The sound of the television echoed in the room but Cagalli did not mind that. The only sound she heard was the calm breathing of Carina and the regular beeping of the machine, displaying a line far from straight. She took comfort in those facts.

Her daughter was alive. The surgery was successful. And despite the current situation and the confusing revelation, Cagalli was still happy. After all, her daughter had just been into a life-threatening situation and to know that she was still here, alive, not minding the IV and oxygen mask, Cagalli was contented with that.

Athrun's a noble man. Cagalli knew that.

He gave Carina his blood and though Cagalli still didn't know whether he accepted the fact that Carina Ashlyn was his daughter, she knew that Athrun wouldn't let the little child die, no matter whose she was.

Cagalli sighed.

* * *

It was dead silent.

Everyone didn't utter a single word.

It was ironic too. A little girl's life was on the line and here they were, the great heroes of mankind, wasting time because of the great revelation.

Well, you couldn't really blame them. It was, after all, a shocking fact.

Ok, so Lacus, Milly and Shiho knew the truth beforehand though that didn't change the fact that this was an awkward moment for all, knowing the truth or not.

"Please…" Cagalli murmured into the silent atmosphere.

The doctor had gone to make the preparations, leaving the others behind to decide whether or not to save the girl.

"You don't have to do anything," Cagalli said. "You don't have to…just give her some blood…give her a chance to live. That's all I'm asking for, Athrun.

I don't care if you'll accept this or not. I don't care if you'll start to be involved in her life. Those are your choices and decisions to make. I couldn't make those choices for you or force you into that particular decision. I just want you to save her life, just like how you saved thousands many years ago. If you're angry and hurt, I understand. But don't take it on Carina. What happened was my fault and mine alone. If you don't want to do this for me then don't. But do this for a child who just barely lived her life and may have a great future in store for her."

Again, silence.

"Athrun…" Meyrin stared at her fiancée, eyes brimming with tears. She looked at him and saw a man with a face of unexplainable shock. There was a mix of emotion present in his expression.

Hurt, pain, anger, disappointment, shock, regret…all those in one expression and for once, Meyrin couldn't see Athrun as she did in the past.

"I'll do it," Athrun said and everyone's heads snapped up. "I'll do it."

Cagalli cried, "Thank you."

Everyone waited together for three hours in the waiting room, not speaking a single word, just the occasional huff or sigh.

* * *

Cagalli looked again at her daughter's face. She leaned over and kissed her on the forehead. "Mommy's so sorry…Mommy's so sorry."

* * *

"How could this have happened?" Yzak growled, slamming his fist on a table.

Yzak, Dearkka, Shiho, Milly, Shinn and Luna went to a bar after leaving the hospital, not knowing where else to go.

"Yzak," Shiho said. "Calm down."

"I _can't_ believe it," Dearkka shook his head absently and then gulped a shot of vodka. He turned to face his girlfriend who just sat there on the bar stool, staring at the table, showing no emotion. "You _knew_?"

Milly sighed. "Yeah."

"This is just fu-," Shinn started when he was nudged by Luna on the ribs.

"_Don't curse_," She scolded. Truth be told, she wanted to curse right now. She wanted to curse and curse till oblivion. But the problem is, she didn't know who to curse. Athrun? Cagalli? Meyrin? Carina? That Kent guy? Themselves? The war? Destiny?

Or maybe all of them together.

"Why didn't she _tell_ us?" Yzak seethed. "Why did all of this _happen_ in the first place?"

"We don't know, Yzak," Shiho whispered. "None of us does."

"Alright, first the war and then the second war and then all this _crap_," Dearkka gave a sharp sigh, a bit tipsy as he gulped another shot of vodka.

"Don't get drunk," Milly told him, still not moving from her place.

* * *

"I don't get it," Kira shook his head, pacing to and fro at the waiting lounge of the hospital with his wife observing his every move. "_Why_? _Why_ did she keep it a secret? _Why_ did she make herself suffer this long? _Why_ did she hide her child for two years, without even _telling_ us?"

"Kira…"

But Kira kept on ranting on and on.

"_Kira…_"

No, Kira _still_ didn't hear her.

"Kira!"

"Huh?" Kira's head snapped up and faced his wife. "Is something the matter?"

"Kira," Lacus sighed. "You _have_ to calm down."

"Calm down?" Kira asked incredulously. "Lacus, I just found out my sister was _impregnated_ by my best friend! What you're asking me to do is out of the question! _Impossible!_"

"Kira, you have to understand that-," Lacus tried once more but was cut off.

"How can _you_ be so calm, Lacus?" Kira stopped his pacing. "Surely…I mean, your best friend, your sister-in-law…you just found out that she had a child with…with your ex-fiancé- wait, don't tell me. You _knew_, didn't _you_?"

Kira's narrowed eyes made Lacus swallow. "_Well…_"

"Lacus!" Kira exclaimed. "I can't believe it! You knew and you didn't tell me? I'm your husband! We're not supposed to keep secrets from each other!"

"Kira, it's not like I meant to," Lacus explained. "You need to understand. The reason Cagalli kept Carina's existence a secret was because she wanted to protect her and as her best friend as well as her sister-in-law, it is also my duty to help her in any means I can."

"But Lacus-,"

"If you were in her shoes, Kira," Lacus started. "Let's practice empathy here, shall we? Let's say you were in her shoes, would you have done what she did?"

"…"

"I know I would," Lacus admitted.

"Lacus, you…"

"Sometimes, the right thing isn't always the easiest way," Lacus said as Kira sat beside her.

"I know," Kira answered.

"And sometimes, as sad as it may sound, there may never even be a right thing to do," Lacus sighed.

"The world…" Kira leaned back. "Why is it so strange?"

_Because the world is reality and truth._

And everyone knows that truth and reality have always been the strangest things.

* * *

Meyrin walked outside into the cold air of December City but she didn't feel it.

She only felt the coldness in her heart which could not compete to the physical cold of the air.

But what was she doing now?

She had her suspicions. She knew Carina's not a normal child, far before this happened.

And she guessed, in a way, her hunch had been right, no matter how much that hunch hurt her and no matter how hard she tried not to believe.

_This wasn't happening_, she thought. _This wasn't happening_.

Her tears flowed down her cheeks and she ran away to a direction she didn't know.

She had no place to go, nobody to go to. She just wanted to be alone. Just alone.

She staggered towards a tree at a nearby park and backed against the tall trunk. She slumped against the tree, sliding her body down until she was sitting at the foot of the tree. She folded her knees together and wrapped both her arms around them.

She knew not of what will be Athrun's reaction or how he will act. Will he go back to Cagalli? To Orb?

She didn't know the answers to that.

Everything was so confusing. She didn't know what to do herself. She didn't know how to react to the situation either.

Why was she so pathetic?

All her life, all her life, she had always been overshadowed by Luna. She may have been a soldier and a coordinator but she couldn't protect herself, not like Luna, and not like _her_.

She already knew that life wasn't all about happy times. Hell, she had been through war. But, why? Why was life so unfair to her?

Did she do something wrong? Did she anger Destiny? Or Fate? Or God?

It was just so unfair.

But, then again, why was she reacting like this?

Maybe, just maybe, this was God's way of saying there are some things we could not have.

Meyrin could only cry that night, all the while thinking, _but did it have to be this way?

* * *

_

Athrun drove fast, speeding along the freeway. He fought tears as he tried to concentrate on the road but he couldn't.

How could he?

That's a stupid question.

It was just so confusing. Everything…was all so complicated.

He just wanted to be _normal_, for crying out loud!

_Normal_, was that so hard to ask?

He never wanted to be a soldier, to kill. But he let that go since he wanted to protect.

And then this happened. Why couldn't he just have a normal life for once?

I mean, he loved Cagalli. He loves Cagalli.

But you couldn't blame him for sometimes wanting to be just Athrun and to be with just Cagalli. Just Cagalli and _not _the Princess of Orb or Chief Representative Athha.

And maybe, that's partly the reason why he thought it may be best to be with Meyrin. Everyone's lives will be ok...normal.

And then came Carina.

At first sight, he already knew something was up with the child. It was like déjà vu of some sort- like knowing that he saw her once but he couldn't say when or where. Little did he know that he was just seeing a reflection of himself- as a girl this time though.

He didn't know what to think, let alone act.

All this time he was oblivious of the fact that he had a daughter and he felt so stupid not realizing it. It was his daughter, for Pete's sake!

It was as if all those times that he spent together with the little girl, he could finally hear the voice ringing in his head, _'That's your daughter, you asshole!'_

Athrun slammed his fist on the wheel, causing it to emit a loud sound.

He had a daughter.

He was about to marry someone he cares about yet did not love.

He was going to leave the woman he loves, _again_.

He was doing things that his heart told him not to.

So now, the real question was, what _was he going to do?

* * *

_**Well, I don't have much to say except that I hope you guys are contented with their respective reactions and that I detailed them enough...**

**Truth be told, I kinda feel sorry for Meyrin (even if I still hate her) while I was writing her part...I mean, it really hurts, right?**

**But anyway, this chapter is kind of angsty-like, I don't know, haha. But still, hope you guys liked it!**

**And of course, please review!**


	20. Chapter 18

L**ost Love**

* * *

** Chapter 18**

"Representative! Is it true that you have a child?"

"Lady Cagalli! Tell us, are you in a relationship with ZAFT Supreme Commander Athrun Zala?"

"Representative Athha! Please comment on this! Is Athrun Zala the father of your child?"

"Was there an assassination attempt, Representative?"

"What do you have to say about the current situation, Princess?"

"Is there anything you'd like to say to the world?"

"Representative!"

"Lady Athha!"

"Princess!"

Cagalli ignored the paparazzi and media surrounding her. She walked towards a car with Lacus and Shiho.

Shiho was trying to hold back the reporters attacking Cagalli and Lacus but all in vain.

"Chairwoman! Did you know of the assassination attempt?"

"How do you feel about Lady Athha and Commander Zala's relationship, Lady Yamato?"

"Is their relationship a true story, Chairwoman Clyne-Yamato?"

"Do you have any say regarding this revelation, Chairwoman?"

"Can we have a comment, Lady Yamato?"

"Chairwoman!"

"Lady Yamato!"

"Chairwoman Yamato!"

The microphones and cameras were pressed against the car window and even the reporters' faces were up against them. _Media_.

Cagalli sighed. "I haven't seen this much media since the PLANTs and Orb formed the peace treaty!"

"Yes, the situation has caused quite a…uh…" Lacus paused, uncertain of what to say.

"It's alright to say it, Lacus," Cagalli sighed again.

"Turmoil…" Lacus bowed her head.

"Take us to the command center!" Shiho ordered the chauffer who sped through the highway.

"God, this," Cagalli shook her head. "I never imagined that this would cause…oh, God…"

"It's not your fault," Shiho said, taking her seat across the two leaders.

"It is, Shiho," Cagalli said. "It is."

* * *

Everything became a mess the very next day.

Maybe it wasn't the doctor, but someone spilled the beans, probably, otherwise, why in heaven's name would the media know that Chief Representative Athha had a child, with ZAFT Supreme Commander Zala no less?

Ergo, the media came forth and did what they did best. I'm sure all of you know what that was.

It was like a stampede, more or less. Cagalli and Lacus hadn't even left the hospital room of Carina when they received urgent messages that they were about to be attacked by a mob of nosy reporters and that alone, even without the current situation, was a problem, a big, big problem at that.

Athrun was at the command center, sending a few soldiers to barricade the hospital. Despite the newest rumor about Athrun, his subordinates still followed his orders without question.

Kira, Shinn and Luna stayed behind to keep watch on Carina while Yzak and Dearkka went to a meeting with some of the media and the councilor of December City regarding the matter at hand. Meyrin was still sitting against the tree though aware of what was taking place. After a few minutes, she made a move to also head out to the hospital, thinking that would be the best place to go to.

* * *

"Athrun!" Lacus called as soon as she, Cagalli and Shiho entered his office.

Athrun stood up and looked at all three of them. "Glad to see you guys made it out of there ok. I apologize for not being there."

"It's alright, Athrun," Lacus said softly. "Please tell us, though, what exactly _is_ happening?"

"Well, I think the answer to that is a bit too obvious, Chairwoman," Athrun said in a formal tone. "The media discovered about the…uh…complicated situation we are now facing and for them, that 'situation' is quite interesting."

"I was afraid…" Lacus shook her head. "We'll need to get Cagalli and Carina to a safe place…to Orb, maybe?"

"By now, Orb would have heard the news," Cagalli admitted.

"And with the media and everything," Shiho said, "Getting out of here would be impossible."

"Commander!" A blurred voice was heard through the speaker.

"Yes?" Athrun responded.

"The media is here, Commander." The voice reported. "The remaining soldiers went to barricade but the number is overwhelming."

"I'll be right there," Athrun said firmly.

"Roger!"

And the line went out.

"So, I'll go handle the mobs," Athrun turned to the three women. "Why don't you guys make a plan? We'll need one."

"Sure," Shiho replied and Athrun went out of the room.

"So," Shiho faced Lacus and Cagalli. "Any ideas?"

"Well, both of us…we _are_ used to this kind of situation," Lacus admitted. "Isn't that right, Cagalli?"

Cagalli sighed, sitting on a nearby chair. "Yeah. If it involves the media, Lacus and I are technically experts."

"But you guys _do_ know this is a different kind of situation," Shiho pointed out. "Everyone's reputation's on the line here and an innocent child's life is at stake. That's something we can't just ignore."

"Yes, we know," Cagalli combed her hair with a hand. "We know all too well. This is just…damn it."

"We'll have to tell the whole truth to the world, Cagalli," Lacus sat beside her friend. "It's the only way to solve this mayhem."

"In the end, there are no secrets," Shiho mumbled and shook her head.

"I'm just…I'm just not ready," Cagalli told them. "It's too soon…and I don't know what's going to happen next. Carina's life might be in danger, my reputation and Orb's too and we're not even considering my own personal life!"

"We know, Cagalli, we know," Shiho patted Cagalli's back. "But we couldn't keep things up like this any longer, Cagalli. If we won't speak, that doctor or some patients would rat us out and that's even more damaging."

"Maybe, we just need a bit more time," Lacus suggested. "Let's give Cagalli some time and we'll tell the world the truth then. What do you think?"

"That's the best thing we could do now," Cagalli concluded. "Pathetic."

"Cagalli…"

Cagalli stood up from her seat and paced around the room. "But, I'd need time."

"Of course," Shiho nodded. "We'd just feed something to the media and just wait?"

"Yeah, and maybe it's best if Carina stays here…with you, Lacus?" Cagalli turned towards her sister-in-law.

"Of-of course," Lacus said immediately. "Why? Are you planning to go somewhere?"

"Maybe it's best if I go back to Orb…" Cagalli trailed off. "There are some things I still need to take care of, after all and I'll make the big revelation there."

"Alright then," Shiho agreed. "If that's your decision then the next problem is how to get _you_ to Orb without being conspicuous and followed by the media."

"Well, that's not exactly difficult," Cagalli shrugged. "I've got the disguise and I could use a mobile suit to descend to Earth…talk with Kisaka about the landing and you know…"

"Absolutely not," Shiho said flatly. "There is _no way_ we are going to let you risk piloting a mobile suit while descending to Earth. Totally out of the question!"

"I have to agree with Shiho, Cagalli," Lacus said.

Cagalli huffed. "Ok, so what do you propose we do then?"

"You wear a disguise, fly down to Earth in a shuttle, have two or three people with you and tell the pilot to keep his mouth shut," Shiho clasped her hands.

"I suppose that's ok," Cagalli slowly agreed. Despite the circumstances, she _did_ miss being able to pilot a mobile suit.

"It's more reasonable, isn't it?" Lacus said.

* * *

"Mommy, where are you going?" Carina looked up, almost in tears. She didn't like the fact that her mother's going away.

"I'm just going on a trip, Sweetie," Cagalli said, kneeling down to Carina's level.

"Can't I come, Mommy?" Carina pouted.

"I'm afraid not, Sweetie," Cagalli caressed her daughter's cheek. "It's too dangerous for you."

"Then why is Mommy going?" Carina furrowed her eyebrows.

"Because I have to do something there," Cagalli explained.

"Don't worry, little one," Lunamaria's voice interrupted. "Uncle Shinn and I will keep your Mommy safe."

"Are you sure?" Carina was skeptical.

"Yes, very sure," Luna confirmed.

"Alright then…" Carina said slowly. "Bye Mommy."

"Bye, Sweetie, you listen to Aunt Lacus and Uncle Kira, alright?" Cagalli hugged Carina tightly.

It was almost midnight and Cagalli, in a disguise, was boarding the ship headed towards Orb accompanied by Shinn and Luna. Only Kira came with them while Lacus, Shiho, Athrun and Milly said their goodbyes earlier so as not to become suspicious. Yzak and Dearkka were still in the council meeting which Lacus will join in a few moments. Kira secretly stole Carina away from the hospital so that she'll be able to say goodbye to her mother.

Thankfully, no one noticed them when they arrived at the field. They were supposed to fly to Orb in secret and already contacted Kisaka as to the details of their arrival.

"I leave her in your hands, Kira," Cagalli whispered in her brother's ear as they hugged.

"Don't worry, you can trust me," Kira assured her.

"Yeah, I know," Cagalli gave a small smile and nodded. "Be safe."

"You too," Kira answered and turned towards the two others. "We're counting on you."

"Of course," Luna nodded once.

They boarded the ship and Cagalli looked out of the window to see Carina in Kira's arms, waving goodbye. In tears, Cagalli waved back until she could see them no more as the ship leaves December City and heads towards Orb.

Their plan was when Cagalli reached Orb, she'll go to her cottage while Shinn and Luna go to Shinn's old house, which was still miraculously standing after two wars. After a few days' time, Cagalli will then step into the spotlight and reveal the truth, the whole truth and after that, well, they can only hope for the best.

It was four in the morning when they reached Orb and Kisaka, together with Erica Simmons were there, waiting for them. Nothing much was said other than the formal greetings. Kisaka knew that Cagalli needed some time alone and therefore, did not bother her and instead, sent her home in a car.

During the ride, Cagalli couldn't help but feel so pathetic. She cried on the way, her tears flowing down her cheeks, not even stopping for a moment.

She reached her house to find no one. She couldn't expect anything less. She had been informed that Myrna stayed with Caridad when Cagalli was in PLANTs.

The moment Cagalli stepped into the house, she knew what she had to do, or at least what she _wanted_ to do.

She grabbed the car keys and started the car, threw her duffle in the trunk and started to drive into the city, heading towards a familiar venue.

She decided that after two years of being alone and not being able to share her fears, not accepting help from others until they insisted or blackmailed her, maybe it was time to swallow her pride and take the hands of her loyal friends. She didn't want to be alone that night. She didn't want to cry to herself. She wanted someone to be there with her. She wanted to lean on someone's shoulder for a change.

Cagalli didn't hesitate as she knocked on the door. A woman with blue hair and caring eyes met her beneath the doorframe. "Cagalli!"

"Hey, Auntie…" Cagalli smiled sadly, crying. "Can I spend the night here?"

"Of course," Caridad's eyes softened. "You know you're welcomed here anytime, Cagalli."

And for the rest of the day, Cagalli cried her heart out.

* * *

**Alright, so this chapter isn't really telling much but I assure you that their feelings will be a lot clearer in the next chapter. I might edit this chapter as well in the near future because frankly, I'm not quite satisfied. But I posted this today because it's been a bit of a long time already since my last update.  
**

**But still, I hope you guys liked it.**

**As always, of course, please review!**


	21. Chapter 19

**Lost Love **

* * *

**Chapter 19**

It had been two days since Cagalli's return to Orb and by then, the media had already found out that she had left PLANTs. Kisaka still took Cagalli's position since the princess was still panicking about what to do. She stayed in her Aunt's house together with Myrna and sought refuge there with Shinn and Luna dropping in for a few visits to make sure she's safe.

Meanwhile, in PLANT, things have settled down as Lacus already spoke to the media about the matter and compromised with them. She returned to Aprilius with Kira and Carina to attend some political matters but not without giving Athrun something to think about first.

"_Athrun," Lacus approached the man who stood there, gazing at the night sky. _

"_Hm?" Athrun turned around to see his friend, smiling. "Lacus? Is there something wrong?"_

"_I just wanted to impart a few words before I leave, that's all," Lacus explained._

"_What are you trying to say, Lacus?" Athrun asked, confused._

"_Well, thankfully, the war with the media had settled down to a fairly lower scale," Lacus sat on a stone bench. "But I feel as if your heart is not yet in peace."_

_Athrun gave a small smile, "It never was, Lacus."_

"_Oh?" Lacus arched an eyebrow. "I doubt that…there had been times in the past when you seem extremely happy, when you seem as if you were at peace with yourself."_

"_Maybe," Athrun admitted._

"_Is the fact that you have a daughter bothering you?" Lacus questioned, tilting her head towards a window in which you could see the silhouette of the little child playing._

_Athrun looked at her for quite some time and sighed. "I don't know, Lacus, I really don't know."_

"_Do you really?" Lacus gave him a knowing smile. "I hope I won't offend you with this but Athrun, you really have this problem. You know all of us…you know Kira, you know Cagalli, you know Shinn, you know Meyrin, you know me and many else but you don't know the most important person whom you should understand the most…yourself."_

"_Lacus?"_

"_You're a good man, Athrun," Lacus looked up in the sky. "A very noble man, actually, but there are also times when you should be a little selfish and fulfill your own desires."_

"_You-," Athrun started but stopped._

"_Understand your own self, my friend," Lacus stood up from her seat and turned around, heading inside. She paused by the door and turned around, giving Athrun a small but knowing smile, "With your own goals and dreams, which I'm sure you have, you can go a long way especially with the many good qualities you possess. You just need to be a little selfish. You know, it wouldn't really hurt to have a few things you want once in a while."_

"_Lacus…"

* * *

_

"Why is this so hard?" Cagalli's hands fisted on her hair, wanting to pull out the roots.

"Calm down, Cagalli," Caridad tried to soothe her niece.

"I just…I just can't do it, Auntie," Cagalli sobbed. "I just can't."

"Oh you'll be able to do it, let's just divide what you have to do into smaller jobs," her aunt suggested. "You do these things all the time; don't tell me you couldn't do it now."

"It's not that…it's just, I don't know," Cagalli shook her head furiously. "I've never did this when the situation is…_like this_!"

"Come now; let's take this one step at a time, shall we?" Caridad held her hand. "Alright, first off, Carina."

"Ok," Cagalli took a deep breath. "Carina…How do I protect her?"

"Just like you've always done," Caridad answered easily.

"From the media?" Cagalli countered.

"Well, that's a bit tricky," Caridad bit her lip.

"Maybe…I could heighten her security?" Cagalli said. "She'd just have to get used to it…but, what if she _doesn't_ get used to it?"

Caridad sighed at the sight of Cagalli panicking, _again_, "Cagalli, dear, didn't I already tell you? You don't need to think far into the future right now. Tell me, what is it do you think will benefit Carina the most?"

Cagalli closed her eyes, "Well, I'd give her love and care. I want to give her a sense of security and peace and I want her to know that no matter what, I'll always be there for her."

"Well then," Caridad smiled. "There's your answer. Especially since it's not only you who loves and cares about her, she'll be getting lots of those things you said earlier."

"Yeah, maybe…"

"Alright! Second off," Caridad announced. "Athrun and your love life."

* * *

Kira and Lacus had already left taking Carina with them. Yzak and Dearkka as well, went to Aprilius to take care of some matters. Milly, of course, went with Dearkka. Only Athrun, Shiho and Meyrin stayed in December City.

And yet, right now, Shiho was at the command center, fixing a few things.

Meyrin stood in front of a large mirror. It showcased a redhead in a white floor-length dress. It was only a simple attire yet it looked good but the woman staring at it didn't like what she was seeing one bit.

It was supposed to be her wedding day. But, the date was postponed because of the current matters at hand and the fact that all of them were so confused didn't help one bit.

She had always imagined what it would be like to be in a wedding dress…everyone would stare at her in awe and the groom would be there, smiling, waiting for the both of them to be wed in holy matrimony.

She smiled sadly. She only saw one face in the groom- Athrun's.

She once again closed her eyes and envisioned herself as the stunning bride- every little girl's dream. She smiled.

She was walking down the aisle. All the guests stood up to honor her special day. She could see many familiar faces- Luna's, Shinn's, Lacus', Kira's and many more. She reached the groom but suddenly she couldn't see his face any longer.

What?

No, she couldn't see any blue hair or emerald eyes…it was all gone. The face was…blank.

But, how could that be?

She looked again. No, there's nothing.

Athrun's not there. He's not the groom, not like the other dreams she had when she could perfectly see that he was the groom.

She was absolutely sure.

If Athrun wasn't there, then what does that mean?

No way, it doesn't- no, it couldn't be.

The groom wasn't Athrun.

_The groom wasn't Athrun. _

But that only means one thing, does it not?

Did she not love Athrun?

Did she even _ever_ love Athrun?

* * *

"Do you love Athrun?" Caridad rested her chin atop her clasped hands.

"Well, there's no sense in denying it now, is there?" Cagalli raised an eyebrow.

"At least you're admitting it," Caridad encouraged. "That's a fairly large step."

"So, I admit it," Cagalli rested her hands flat on the table. "What now?"

Her aunt shrugged, "You love him, he's the father of your child, why don't you answer this question yourself?"

Cagalli looked down and smiled to herself, "It's not going to be easy, you know."

"Who says it's going to be easy in the first place?" Caridad smiled widely. "In this world, nothing's ever easy."

"Yeah, I think we all know that all too well," Cagalli shook her head lightly. "But…the public and Orb…if I reveal this piece of truth, it might ruin everything. What do I do then?"

Caridad only shook her head and smiled, "Well, that's something I, or anyone else, for that matter, can't answer. You'll have to search for the answer yourself, Chief Representative. That's a step you, of all people need to go through. You have to find yourself in the midst of all this mess, Cagalli."

Cagalli bit her lip, "Search for the answer, huh?"

* * *

Another day had passed and Carina sat on the couch, watching the television when Milly came into the room, carrying a tray of pastries.

They were staying at the Yamato Residence and Milly was given the duty to babysit the young girl while Kira and Lacus went to work.

The news channel then had a flash report, interrupting the cartoon show Carina was watching.

"It had been four days since the world heard of the rumor concerning Chief Representative Athha and Supreme Commander Zala. They were said to have been involved romantically and even have an illegitimate child, a young girl, Carina Ashlyn, age two. Prior to this rumor, Kent Bradin, a former ZAFT soldier had attempted an assassination on Chief Representative Athha and Chairwoman Yamato which resulted to the injury of the child. It was then that Doctor Richard Austin discovered that the child is half natural and half coordinator. Since this insinuation is still not confirmed, Colonel Ledonir Kisaka who has been sitting in for the representative when she went to PLANT, became Athha's spokesperson. He released a statement earlier this morning."

Then the scene changed into Cagalli's office with Kisaka sitting behind the desk.

"Today, I will be speaking on behalf of Chief Representative Athha for she still has some matters to settle at the moment. She, as well as Commander Zala is well aware of these rumors surrounding both of them and that's why she will be giving her own opinion on the matter in two days. In the meantime, she has asked to be left alone by the media and she will answer all your questions in two days' time. Thank you."

Milly changed the channel in one move, turning it to a discovery show.

"Aunt Milly?" Carina said slowly.

"Yes, Carina?" Milly faced the child, putting immediately a smile on her face.

"What does illegitimate mean?" She asked softly.

"Um…illegitimate…um, well," Milly was at loss for words. "Why do you ask, Dear?"

"That…that lady called me illegitimate and she sounded like…like she hated me, Auntie," Carina bowed her head.

"Oh, God," Milly sighed and hugged the little child. "It's nothing, Carina…it's just an expression, it's nothing."

* * *

Lacus Clyne-Yamato had never been this stressed in all her life. Well, that's an exaggeration…she _had_ been stressed a couple of times but maybe this situation had taken its toll on her since it's a very personal matter.

They were having a council meeting which wasn't going well. This issue had been a big deal. The Supreme Commander of ZAFT and the Chief Representative of Orb in a romantic relationship? Having a child? A coordinator and a natural?

"We cannot accept this, Chairwoman!" Hermes Gould stood up. "We have to eradicate Athrun Zala of his position or at least demote him!"

"I agree, Chairwoman," Peter Jesek spoke up. "It is a disgrace! An international scandal!"

Lacus sharply sighed and Kira, who was beside her, gave her a worried glance. "And why, Councilor Jesek, would that be a disgrace?"

"Chairwoman, a coordinator and a natural?" the councilor countered. "That's unheard of!"

Dearkka, who was sitting across him, narrowed his eyes in annoyance. "I, on the other hand, feel that this relationship, if there's even one, is something to celebrate about."

Jesek snapped his head and glared at Dearkka, "You don't know anything, you're just a child! This matter is too complicated and I don't even know how you got a place in this council!"

Dearkka stood up and Lacus or Yzak made no move to stop him. "Look here, Jesek, I may just be twenty-one but I've experience a hell of things you never even gotten near to! I went to fight two wars and even got myself almost killed a lot of times while most of you are just sitting here!"

"Councilor Elseman!" Leslie Leitner yelled from her side. "That is enough!"

Yzak, who sat beside Dearkka crossed his arms. Lacus clasped her hands tightly. She herself thought that Dearkka's outburst wasn't unreasonable. After all, Jesek was insulting her too.

"Chairwoman," Leitner turned towards Lacus. "Would you really let Zala stay in the military with this? Even if he _is_ your former fiancée and friend, he can't be trusted."

Lacus was at loss of words and a mix of emotions spurred inside of her. "Councilor Leitner, as well as all of you, do you share the same feeling?"

Jerome Maxwell stood up, "I think I speak for all, maybe except for Councilor Elseman, that all of us _do_ feel that way, Chairwoman."

"Not just Elseman, Maxwell," Yzak spoke up. "I don't think I've ever said that you're speaking on my behalf as well."

Maxwell, taken aback, was speechless. Well, the three people in their twenties who were in the council needed to stick together, after all.

"Chairwoman!" Arsi Kasim stood up. "You're not seriously allowing this-."

Lacus then stood up. She had had enough. "All of you, with the exception of Councilor Joule and Councilor Elseman, didn't learn from the two wars."

"What-?"

"I'm not biased." Lacus stated. "It isn't because I'm a good friend of Commander Zala that I'm saying this. I'm saying this because this is what I feel, no matter what my relationship with Athrun Zala is. Coordinators and naturals are humans. Yes, the coordinators may be genetically altered to enhance our skills but that doesn't change the fact that we are all the same, coordinators _and_ naturals. And with regards to this rumored relationship between Representative Athha and Commander Zala, well, I believe you should wait for Lady Cagalli's statement before you make any conclusions rather than just ripping Athrun's title because of a rumor that has not yet even been confirmed."

"But Chairwoman, this would ruin the reputation of the council! And the PLANT!" Orsic White protested. "What Zala will bring…"

"I did _not_ place Athrun Zala in his position without reason or just because I wanted to!" Lacus slammed her fist on the table and everyone, including Kira was shocked. "I put people in their respective rankings because I _know_ they are capable of accomplishing whatever duties that rank demanded. And we all know that Athrun Zala is _more_ than capable to lead and to fight. And I will _not_ have him taken off from his position just because of this one matter!"

"And what will you do, Chairwoman, when this rumor is proved to be true?" Felicity Blanc challenged.

"As I have said," Lacus said, maintaining her usual composure. "Athrun Zala will maintain his position whether or not this rumor is true. And I will not permit any bad behavior, insults or disrespect towards the man as well as Representative Athha if this allegation _is_ true."

"Chairwoman! We cannot accept this!" Yuri Kanade said. "This is a disgrace! Not only did he involve himself with a natural but he also has an illegitimate child! For someone like him, that is unacceptable!"

"What is unacceptable, may I ask?" Lacus countered. Kira narrowed his eyes, preventing himself not glare at them. He clenched his fist. These guys were really getting on his nerves. "Let's say the rumors were true. So? Athrun Zala and Cagalli Yula Athha fell in love, expressed that love and that love resulted into a child. Is that not normal for two people? Yes, they're not married. Yes, they're coordinator and natural. But could you blame them? No. Both are just normal human beings. The only thing that makes people think that they are superior than many others is their ranks. They are no different from any of us, civilian or soldier, citizen or politician. And as for it being a disgrace because he involved himself with a natural, well, isn't that quite childish? Have you not learned from the two wars that cost lives? What future are we heading towards to when we keep on discriminating the other race? Do we want a future with wars erupting every few years? Do we _not_ want peace?"

When she was met with silence, she said, "This world should learn from its mistakes and change. This meeting is now at an end and I suggest that all of you wait for Representative Athha's statement before making any other rash conclusions."

And she walked away from the meeting room followed by Kira, hoping Cagalli would make her statement a favorable one.

* * *

Athrun roamed in the garden of the family mansion, thinking to himself. He was so confused. And he was worried.

He wasn't worried with what the rumors would do to him, mind you. He was worried about Cagalli, Carina, Meyrin and himself. He was never good in expressing his emotions and even right now, he didn't know how to.

He wanted to cry and to vent out his frustrations. To be more specific, he wanted something or someone to use as a punching bag right now.

He still hadn't figured out his resolve. He loves Cagalli and he obviously had a connection with Carina but with things the way they were, it would be next to impossible staying by her side. Furthermore, he cared about Meyrin too and loves her as well, probably not in the same way as he loves Cagalli but he _does_ loves her as a friend, as a sister and hurting her was something he will regret and feel guilty about.

"Athrun?" Athrun turned towards the sound of the voice to find Meyrin in…traveling clothes?

"Meyrin? What are you…" Athrun trailed off as Meyrin approached him.

"I want to talk to you about something, something we should've talked about a long time ago," Meyrin stood beside him. "Athrun, do you love me?"

He faced her, shocked at the question. "Meyrin…"

"It's alright Athrun," Meyrin smiled. "Tell me the truth."

It took a while before he answered. "Yes, I do love you Meyrin…just not as the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with."

"But as a friend? Or a younger sister?" Meyrin continued.

"Yeah," Athrun nodded. "And I'm sorry, Meyrin. I'm very sorry."

"What's to apologize?" Meyrin said. "You can't help it if you love another person. Loving or caring for someone isn't one's fault. And besides, I feel that way about you too."

"Meyrin?"

"It took me so long to realize," Meyrin shook her head, laughing. "It took me so long to realize that I have never loved you. Well, yes, but not in the same way as Cagalli loves you. And that's why I'm canceling the wedding."

"You're canceling it?" Athrun whispered.

"Yeah," Meyrin nodded. "You were never the right guy for me. I guess I admired you so much to think that I actually loved you but I didn't. I was just deceived by my own hallucinations and I failed to realize that my feelings for you were nothing but a crush. I mean, you're the great Athrun Zala, legendary pilot and war veteran who saved the Earth and helped stopped the war. Who wouldn't fall for you?

"I was just lucky enough to become acquainted with you and later, become closer to you. If it had been another woman, she would have had the same fate as mine but she would never have the place Cagalli has in your heart. Neither time nor destiny can change what you both feel for each other."

"You're a good person, Meyrin," Athrun gave a small smile.

"I'm just happy to realize it before it was too late," Meyrin smiled back. "Now, since we've establish that we will always be _just_ friends and nothing more, let's go to the main issue at hand. The world is pretty curious about your relationship with Cagalli…I'm sure you know that."

"Yeah."

"What will the world's reaction be if they knew the truth?" Meyrin asked. "I don't think that's the real question here. The real question would be if you still love Cagalli and if you are willing to stay with her and be a great father to young Carina."

"That's not exactly something I can answer right now, Meyrin," Athrun admitted.

"You love her, I think I know that much," Meyrin said.

"If only things were easier, if only things weren't so complicated…" Athrun sighed.

"You know, I never thoughts those words could actually come out of your mouth," Meyrin commented. "You weren't the type to give up so why are you even thinking of giving up the one thing that is most important in your life?"

"Giving up doesn't necessarily mean that way all the time," Athrun replied. "Sometimes, it's just better to let go."

"Letting go, huh?" Meyrin looked at Athrun. "I've always heard the saying, 'If you love someone, you got to know how to let them go.' Or something like that…"

"Maybe in my case, that's true," Athrun said. "Cagalli and I…maybe we were never meant to be together."

"Is that really the case? Or are you just afraid?"

"The world will never accept us…a coordinator and a natural," Athrun told her.

"Really? Well, the world should change then," Meyrin smiled. "I, for one, would want to see you guys together and happy. And actually, a coordinator and a natural…that just proves that both races can come to love and care for one another. And that's a future I'd like to see and look forward to even. It's a new beginning for everyone."

"Yeah, I guess," Athrun smiled a little.

"I'm going away, Athrun," Meyrin said suddenly.

"What?" Athrun looked at her. "What do you mean?"

"Here," Meyrin gave Athrun an envelope and he opened it. His eyes widened and he looked at her again, shocked.

"This is a resignation letter!" Athrun exclaimed.

"I know," Meyrin said.

"You're quitting the military?"

"Yes and no," Meyrin answered. "Maybe I'd take a leave, I don't know. The only reason I joined the military was because I wanted to protect. But since the war's over, I'd like to fulfill my own dreams, something you should do too, actually. I'd like to know myself once more. I lost myself during the war and right now, I don't know who I am but I do know that I'd like a new beginning. So I packed my things and decided to travel…I've got enough money to go around the world anyway. Maybe, I'd find true love in my travels, who knows? And maybe I'd get my own happy ending."

"I understand," Athrun smiled. "Thanks Meyrin, for everything."

"It was my pleasure, Athrun," Meyrin said and took out her hand.

Athrun took it and they shook hands.

"Promise me something before I go, won't you?" Meyrin requested.

"Of course, as long as it is within my power," Athrun agreed.

"Oh it is," Meyrin nodded. "I'm traveling for the purpose of finding myself once again and fulfill my dreams so that I'll be able to face you guys with pride when I come back. And I want you to find yourself too. I want you to be happy when I come back and starting a new life, a life where you're happy, _really_ happy and not _just _contented. Promise?"

Athrun nodded and smiled, "Promise."

Meyrin smiled widely and walked away from him. When she reached the door, she paused and took one last glance, waved at him and left.

Athrun stood alone with his thoughts once again. He made a promise to Meyrin and he'll keep that promise not just for her, but for everyone else and himself as well.

Yes, maybe it _is_ time for a new beginning.

Lacus' last words rang in his ears, _You know, it wouldn't really hurt to have a few things you want once in a while.

* * *

_**Wow, this is the longest chapter I've written for this fic as of now.**

**I hope you guys enjoyed it...I know I did, especially when I wrote about the council meeting. Lacus' words were like a slap to their faces! Haha =P**

**I've also planned Athrun and Meyrin's conversation since the beginning of this fic actually...and I'm sure that even Asucaga fans would be delighted as to how Athrun and Meyrin canceled the wedding. Athrun's going back to Cagalli, Meyrin and Athrun are on good terms, Meyrin's not the bad guy...everybody wins, right?**

**So, I sincerely hope you guys liked it and of course, I'll be waiting for your reviews!**


	22. Chapter 20

**Lost Love**

* * *

**Chapter 20**

Lacus sat on the chair in her study. She stared at the white envelope for a while before thinking of opening it. She knew all too well who sent this letter. It was his handwriting that wrote 'Lacus' on the center. And a clean and neat penmanship it was.

She propped her head on one hand and debated with herself whether or not to open it. It wasn't as if she was afraid of its contents. She was just merely nervous, that's all.

She heard a creak coming from the door. She looked up and saw her husband.

"Lacus, you alright?" He approached her. "You've been here for quite a while…what's that?"

He tilted his head, motioning to the letter on the table. He looked down and when he had seen the envelope clearly, he only smiled. "Did that guy send this?"

"Don't you recognize his handwriting, Kira?" Lacus asked.

"Yes and actually, I know it too well," Kira smiled. "Let's go to bed, Lacus, it's already late. Milly and Carina are already asleep. Leave the letter and get back to it tomorrow morning."

"It's alright, Kira, it will only take two minutes," Lacus told him. "Besides, I feel this letter has an urgent need to be read. You go on ahead."

"Alright then," Kira pressed his lips onto Lacus' forehead and left the room, leaving his wife alone with the letter once more.

Lacus took the envelope in her hands and opened it. She gingerly took hold of the stationery inside and started to read. The more she read, the more her smile widened. When she finished, she remained seated for a couple of seconds before standing up. She left the letter there, inside the envelope. She had put it in her drawer.

Lacus turned the lights off and walked towards their bedroom, all the while thinking, _Well, I'm going to lose one of the best soldiers of ZAFT but no matter, I can put Kira and Shiho in-charge for a while…_

**_Dear Lacus,_**

**_After two years of being the supreme commander of ZAFT, I resign from my position. I'd also like to inform you that Meyrin had left to go out in the world and that she'd take a few months' leave. _**

**_I had taken your advice into account and concluded that maybe I'd like to have a new life, a new beginning. It may be hard and difficult to overcome but for her, I'd stop at nothing to get her back. I made a mistake in not going after her once and I'm not going to do that again. _**

**_I love her, you know that and I care for the child as well. She may not easily take me back but I won't give up. For now, I will leave PLANT and go to Orb. I wish to reconcile and get back together with her, despite the current circumstances._**

**_I apologize for my sudden leave from the ZAFT Forces but I feel that if I don't do this now, I may not have another chance and I cannot risk that. I hope you'd understand the situation, which I'm sure you will._**

**_Lastly, I'd like to thank you for your words that were imparted to me that night when you left for Aprilius. I'm terribly grateful to you for inspiring and encouraging me. Though I feel a little uneasy about this whole matter, I decided to fulfill my own desires. After all, it is the time of peace. _**

**_I don't know what will happen next. I just know that what I'm doing is something I'll never regret._**

**_Again, thank you._**

**_ Sincerely,_**

_** Athrun**

* * *

_

"You alright?" Milly leaned in, facing Dearkka.

Dearkka gave her a soft smile, "Yeah."

They were at a restaurant having a date. Carina had already been left in the care of Yzak, much to his dismay. Don't get him wrong, it wasn't like he hated the child. He wasn't just accustomed to 'baby-sitting'.

"Tomorrow, Cagalli will make her speech…" Milly said. "Do you think it will all go well?"

"I don't know," Dearkka shook his head. "Everything still hasn't settled down. Even the council meeting yesterday…God…and Athrun resigned too not to mention they canceled the wedding..."

"Yeah…" Milly sighed. "I heard."

"This statement Cagalli will be giving," Dearkka started. "It will be a great impact, no matter what the outcome is."

"Yes," Milly nodded. "But don't worry, I'm sure Cagalli will do just fine…"

"Let's hope so," Dearkka said. "The result will affect us too, you know."

"Yeah, I know," Milly nodded. Dearkka held her left hand tightly, fingering the sapphire ring on her ring finger.

* * *

Meyrin looked around excitedly.

She was in a new place, in a new life and in a new beginning. She had gone to Earth the next day, but not before receiving a message that Athrun had resigned. Truth be told, she was happy. She knew what that meant. After all, being the commander of ZAFT wouldn't be the ideal job if your lover was in Orb. It'd be difficult to maintain a long-distance relationship and the percentage of it being successful was fairly low.

Meyrin planned on staying in London for a week before heading to France and the other European countries. She would try Asia next then Austalia and she had heard that Africa's pretty interesting, not to mention America, both north and south. She probably wouldn't go to PLANT anytime soon. She had already tired herself of the place.

She had already checked in the hotel. And now, she was heading off for sightseeing. She walked the streets of London, looking at the shops with a wide smile. She might head to Harrods later too. She heard that it was pretty famous to Naturals. Oh, and the Tower Bridge! She'd like to see it too and of course, the London Eye and Big Ben as well. She couldn't miss those, now could she?

She was distracted by the sights and clumsily, she tripped. She fell down on her bottom on the pavement.

_God, did that hurt!_

"Hey, you alright?" a man hovered over her, offering his hand.

Meyrin was speechless. Wow, this guy had…good looks.

Huh.

Meyrin smiled. "Yeah," and she took his hand.

"Thanks," She said.

"No problem, my name is Dean Collins," the man introduced himself.

"I'm Meyrin Hawke. Nice to meet you, Dean."

* * *

Athrun boarded a shuttle headed towards Orb that afternoon and landed on Orb during sunset. He had already contacted Kisaka about his trip and the man stood at the airport, waiting for Athrun.

"Hey, Mr. Kisaka, it's nice to see you again," Athrun greeted him.

"Well, you too, I guess," Kisaka smiled.

"How's she doing?" Athrun asked.

"Well, she's staying at her Aunt's house now," Kisaka got in a car. "I've visited her the other day and she told me that she was ready to give her statement. I gave her two more days to prepare. Seems like she's pretty firm in her decision."

"What will she tell the world?" Athrun asked softly as the car started moving.

"Truthfully, I don't know," Kisaka shook his head. "I just know that she's found her resolve or something like that."

"I see."

They were silent for a few minutes when Kisaka said, "Ms. Lacus told me that you resigned from your position. Care to tell me why?"

"Well, maybe I'm acting rather impulsive on this," Athrun started. "But if I want to be with Cagalli again, there's no way that I'd be able to keep a job at ZAFT."

"So, are you expecting that she's going to run into your arms that easily?" Kisaka arched an eyebrow.

"No," Athrun shook his head. "In fact, I'd be quite surprised if she did that. I'd expect her to be stubborn and noble. She probably wouldn't do it- getting back together with me, but I'd like to try."

"I guess you really _are_ a good guy, after all," Kisaka told him.

"Huh?"

"I was kind of regretting saving you that day when I found out you got Cagalli pregnant," Kisaka said but it was evident he was joking.

"Oh, well, I…" Athrun trailed off.

"But now, maybe I _did_ make the right choice in saving you back then," Kisaka smiled.

"Oh, yes," Athrun's head snapped up. "I haven't gotten the chance to thank you yet…"

"Oh, it's alright," Kisaka said, pulling up at what was obviously Caridad Yamato's house.

"No, not just for that," Athrun shook his once more. "For everything too."

"It's really alright," Kisaka grinned and took on a more serious tone. "I hope she takes you back but don't ever break her heart again or else I'd definitely kill you."

Athrun smiled, getting out of the car. "Don't worry, I won't."

"You better," Kisaka said and gave him a last smile before driving off.

Athrun turned around to face the door of Caridad's house- the only thing that was separating him and Cagalli right at that moment.

* * *

"Chief Representative Cagalli Yula Athha of the Orb Union will be giving her statement tomorrow in a worldwide channel, including the PLANTs regarding the rumors circling around herself and Su-."

Shinn turned the television off and sighed, leaning back on the couch.

"You alright?" Luna asked.

"Yeah, I'm just tired of all of this…" Shinn shook his head. "Over and over they keep on telling us…"

"You know how the media is, Shinn," Luna told him. "And well, for everyone, this _is_ big news. A coordinator _and _a natural _together_? That's like discovering fire for the cavemen!"

"I know how the media is," Shinn got up from the couch and looked out of the window, seeing the beautiful moon. "What I don't understand is how that woman could have gotten into this much trouble."

"You still hate her, don't you?" Luna crossed her legs on the couch, facing him.

"No, it's not that I hate her," Shinn said. "I mean, I don't like her either. It's just…I don't know…I've hated the Athhas with a passion for six years already, it's just too sudden to forgive her just like that."

"But, Shinn," Luna said. "Why do you hate Cagalli and her family so much? I mean, I know that you think of them as the ones who killed your family but isn't hating them a bit, I don't know, over?"

"Maybe it is," Shinn sighed and smiled at Luna. "I guess I _had_ been pretty childish, huh?"

Luna smiled. "You weren't childish, ok, maybe a bit but for most of the time, you were just confused."

"Confused, huh?" Shinn asked himself as Luna walked towards him.

"But it's alright," She said. "We all were. Even now, we're still confused. It may not be about the war but maybe about life itself, don't you think so?"

"Yeah, I guess so," Shinn agreed and wrapped Luna in his arms. "Tomorrow, the truth will be revealed."

"I'm nervous, Shinn," Luna lowered her eyes.

"Yeah…" Shinn closed his eyes. "Me too."

* * *

"Athrun!" Caridad was surprised when she saw the man standing at the door. "What are you…" and then she smiled. "You came back for her, didn't you?"

Athrun nodded and Caridad said, "Well, I'm sure you need some time alone then."

"No, it's alright, you don't have to-," Athrun protested.

"Master Athrun!" a new voice came.

"Hello, Myrna," Athrun greeted the woman.

"We were planning to go out anyway," Caridad gave Myrna a knowing smile.

Myrna looked at her and back at Athrun. She smiled. "Yes, we were. Please, come inside. Do excuse us for leaving you."

"Um, sure…ok…" Athrun said.

"Well, we'll get going," Caridad said, walking out of the house with Myrna.

"Good luck," Myrna told him in a whisper. The two older ladies disappeared when they reached the corner and Athrun smiled, a bit amused.

_Thanks_, he thought.

"Aunt Caridad? Myrna?" he heard a voice…Cagalli's voice.

Athrun closed the door behind him and turned to see the shocked face of Cagalli. "A-athrun…you…what are you doing here?"

"Hi, Cagalli," Athrun said.

Cagalli stared at him then whispered, "What are you doing here?"

"I've come to get you back, Cagalli," Athrun looked at her wistfully.

"No," Cagalli shook her head. "Meyrin…she's…you're…"

Athrun took a step, "Meyrin and I, we're just friends. She canceled the wedding and left."

"She…she canceled the wedding?" Cagalli asked, almost horrified. "But…I…I did this. It was my fault…isn't it?"

"No," Athrun took another step. "We just realized…_she_ realized that we never loved each other the way a husband and wife was supposed to."

"And you came back to get me?" Cagalli asked, almost not believing.

"Yes,"

"Why?" Cagalli's lips trembled.

"Because I love you and I don't want to lose you ever again," Athrun looked at her, his eyes capturing hers.

"You know this wouldn't work out, Athrun," Cagalli shook her head. "This wouldn't…we already tried…"

"I don't care," Athrun said firmly. "I'm not about to give you up again."

"But, Orb…and your job…" Cagalli trailed off.

"I resigned," he answered simply.

"You what?" Cagalli was a bit taken aback. "But Lacus…"

"Lacus will understand," Athrun told her and Cagalli lowered her eyes.

"You won't give up, will you…?" Cagalli said.

"Of course not," Athrun stepped closer.

"The world won't accept us."

"How would you know that?" Athrun asked. "You haven't even given your speech yet."

"You saw how they reacted," Cagalli said. "And that was when it was just a rumor. Think about what they will do when they find out that it's all true?"

"If you were afraid of finding that out," Athrun started. "Why are you giving out a statement then? Isn't it because you have faith that maybe, just maybe, they'll accept us?"

"I just wanted the burden off my shoulders, Athrun," Cagalli admitted. "It's been so hard. For two years, always hiding, always protecting her…it's so hard."

"I know," Athrun said. "And I'm sorry I wasn't there. I'm sorry I didn't go back to you when I should have. I'm sorry I hurt you too many times. I'm sorry for causing you all this grief."

"You don't have to be sorry for anything," Cagalli told him. "I am in as much fault as you are."

"You don't have to always be like this you know," Athurn told her guiltily.

"What?"

"Always being so brave…trying to do everything yourself," Athrun explained. "You're not alone…you were never alone and you will never be alone…"

"I didn't have a choice, did I?" Cagalli was getting all misty-eyed. "I didn't want to be a burden anymore…I just didn't want to cause you, or anyone else anymore pain…"

"We don't care…" Athrun was at the verge of crying too. "I don't care. I promised to protect you and I failed to keep that promise."

"I never asked you to fulfill it in the first place," Cagalli said in a soft voice.

"There you go again," Athrun whispered. "Being so noble…you never deserved this kind of pain…"

"But I do," Cagalli replied. "A lot of things that happened during the second war were my fault…"

"No, it wasn't," Athrun told her. "It wasn't and you can't feel guilty like this…it wasn't your fault. It never was."

Cagalli brought a hand to her mouth and cried. Athrun immediately wrapped her in his arms. "It's alright…just let it all go…"

They stood there for a few moments before Cagalli broke the silence, "Why did you come back? It would be easier if things stayed the way they were."

"No, it wouldn't be," Athrun answered. "It may have seemed like it but it wouldn't make things a lot easier than it is now."

"You love me…or at least you told me that…"

"Are you doubting my words?" Athrun looked at Cagalli's tear-streaked face.

"No," Cagalli shook her head. "But what if I told you that I don't love you? That I never loved you…what will you do?"

"I won't believe it," Athrun said. "Not until I could see it in your heart, not until I could see it in your eyes…well, do you? Do you not love me?"

Cagalli looked down, "Yes, I do…I _do_ love you."

"Then why are you making this so difficult?" he asked.

"Because I didn't want to hurt you anymore," Cagalli said. "I didn't want to see that look on your face ever again. It doesn't matter if you don't love me anymore, if you don't like me anymore, if you even hate me now…as long as you're happy, then I'm fine."

Athrun gave a snort, "Why do you always say those things? I will always love you, no matter how many times you've hurt me. You're worth it…you're more than worth it."

"No, I'm not," Cagalli murmured. "I can't stand seeing you…seeing you in pain…I don't- I don't want to, Athrun, I just don't!"

Cagalli was sobbing now.

"Can't you understand, Cagalli?" Athrun said patiently. "Both of us…we cannot be separate from each other. No matter how many times we're hurt or in pain, at the end of the day, we will always be together."

"How could you be so positive about this?"

"It's because I believe," Athrun wrapped her in an embrace once again. "I believe that I love you more than anything else in this whole world and I know that you do too. I believe that no matter how rocky the path is, we'll always get to the beautifully paved road. I believe that we'll always be together, no matter how far we are. Maybe I didn't show it by deciding to marry Meyrin but I do. I do believe Cagalli. And do you know what I believe the most?

"What?" She squeaked.

"That both of us will have another chance to renew our relationship," He said. "I don't care if we have to start from scratch. I don't care if everyone else ridiculed us. I don't care whatever the world says. I'm going to fight for you, Cagalli…for both of us…will you?"

Cagalli looked at him and smiled amidst the tears flowing down her cheeks. "Yes, I will."

And that's when they kissed. It wasn't a hungry one, not like the last time they kissed. It was sweet and chaste and passionate in its own way. It was a sign of a promise, a promise that they will try their best to keep no matter what the world throws at them. It was a promise that will take them to the deepest part of their relationship. It was a promise filled with hope, faith and of course, love.

When they parted, Cagalli rested her head on Athrun's chest. "I promise, Cagalli, I promise."

Cagalli then looked up. "Promise is a really big word, Athrun."

"I know," Athrun smiled. Cagalli looked into Athrun's emerald orbs. _Yes_, she thought, _maybe there was still a chance after all…now all that needs to be done is to tell the world the truth.

* * *

_

**Alright, I never thought that this is how the reconciliation would go, but still, hope you guys liked it and that it lived up to your expectations since it's one of the most important highlights of this story. I know Cagalli looked like she didn't want to get back together at first but she really does, actually. She just didn't want to hurt anyone, especially Athrun for obvious reasons.**

**Anyway, while writing this chapter, especially the last part, I almost cried...I probably did but despite shedding a few tears, this is one of the chapters that I enjoyed writing the most. So, I hope you shared the same feeling as mine when you guys were reading this chapter.**

**I can't tell when I'm going to update next because I'm not so sure how to write Cagalli's speech. If you guys have any ideas or suggestions, I'd be more than happy to take those in.**

**Please review!**


	23. Chapter 21

**Lost Love **

* * *

**Chapter 21**

Cagalli looked at what was in front of her- a huge crowd of people, and that wasn't even counting the larger crowd at the back.

At the front were the reporters and cameramen. The civilians were further at the back. All of them were compacted like a can of sardines, especially the media who were already up against the stage as well as the podium Cagalli was currently standing in.

It seemed as if everyone stopped working and dropped whatever stuff they were supposed to be doing when they announced that the chief representative was going to make her speech in five minutes. People, seriously.

Cagalli stood there at the podium, both hands gripping its sides. Oh, was she nervous, alright. This was the day of the big revelation, the day when everything comes out in the open and the day when everything _will_ change, be it for the better or for worse.

Cagalli looked at her left to see the other politicians sitting on chairs, both legs and arms crossed with passive faces which show no emotion at all. Cagalli then looked at the other side to see Erica, Kisaka and then Athrun.

People would've wondered why in the world was he here. After all, he _did_ have an important job back in PLANT. Lacus must not have announced yet that Athrun had already resigned from his post just yesterday. The fact that he's here scared people. Could it have been true?

Well, they'll know in a few minutes.

Athrun noticed Cagall's glance and gave her a knowing and encouraging nod. Cagalli gave him a small smile, as if saying, _Well, it's now or never…_

Cagalli looked back at her gigantic audience, closed her eyes for a second and breathed out. _You've got to do it sometime, Cagalli_, she told herself. _You can't keep them all waiting like this._

Cagalli sighed, "Good morning to all of you…"

* * *

"You what?" Shinn's eyes widened at Cagalli's statement. "What do you mean you wouldn't let us go with you?"

"It's as simple as that," Cagalli told him. "Both you and Luna going there would make them more suspicious…"

"And Athrun's presence wouldn't?" Shinn retorted.

"No, that's not what I meant," Cagalli shook her head. "I've already given you both enough burden as it is."

"But, we were told to protect you," Luna reasoned. "Surely someone would oppose and may opt to try something…"

"It's alright," Cagalli said. "I know how to protect myself and besides, I have already asked Kisaka to heighten the security."

"Well, yes, but still," Luna insisted.

"That's why I'm here," Athrun spoke up and wrapped an arm around Cagalli.

"It's not that we don't trust your abilities, Athrun," Luna started. "Hell, we're more than confident of them, but it's just not right. Whether or not it's our duty, we still wouldn't let them hurt you. You are our friend after all even if we're not that close. You still are."

"Thanks, Lunamaria," Cagalli smiled. "I appreciate it. And as your friend as well, I wish for both of you to stay here with Myrna and Aunt Caridad."

Knowing that they couldn't resist any longer, Luna nodded, "Alright then."

"Thank you," Cagalli said. "Aunt Caridad, Myrna, please stay here too. I don't want to involve you guys in this mess as much as possible."

"We understand," Caridad hugged her niece who in turn, hugged her back. "We're here for you Cagalli. Don't worry, everything's going to be alright in the end."

"Yes," Cagalli nodded and hugged Myrna next. The loyal lady brushed a stray hair off Cagalli's face.

"Don't lose faith, Miss Cagalli," She told her. "You're not the one to give up…don't give up now, no matter what they throw at you."

"Thank you," Cagalli sobbed. "I'm so sorry…"

"Sh, there's nothing to apologize for, Dear," Myrna patted Cagalli's back. "Just make sure you come back with a smile."

Cagalli said, "Yes, promise," gave the two others present a nod in the head and started walking out of the door with Athrun.

"Cagalli!" Luna called and Cagalli turned around. "Yes?"

Luna hugged her. "Good luck."

Cagalli was stunned for a few moments but hugged her back. "Thank you…that means a lot."

They rode the limousine towards the parliament building and from there, along with the other representatives; they will be heading to the city plaza. Athrun held her hand tightly. "It's going to be all ok," he assured her but no matter how many times he told her that, the feeling of uneasiness will never leave her heart.

* * *

Milly and Shiho were at Lacus' house and that was where they were planning to watch Cagalli's speech. A bowl of chips and some sodas laid there on the table while both were leaning back on the couch with Carina sandwiched in the middle.

"Aunt Milly, Aunt Shiho?" Carina looked up.

"Yes?"

"Why is Mommy on television?" She asked innocently.

"That's because she's going to say something to the world." It was Shiho who answered.

"What will she say?" She asked yet again.

"She's going to tell the world about you, Sweetie," Milly said.

"About me?" Carina said in confusion.

"Yes, about you."

* * *

"Good morning to all of you," Cagalli greeted. "First, I'd like to remind the reporters to please ask the questions later if you have found what I have said not sufficient. Your questions will be answered with the best of my abilities and deepest of my knowledge."

With that, everybody shut up and the atmosphere became silent.

She didn't want to do this in an office because she wanted the people to know that what she was saying right then was all her. There was no script, no teleprompter, no nothing. Everything she said, or will say came from her heart, from her mind, from what she felt. They are pure feelings with honest intentions and goals, never intending to harm anyone and that's what she will show to the world.

"With regards to this situation and the alleged rumors surrounding both Athrun Zala, _former_ Supreme Commander of the ZAFT Forces and myself, I have a lot of things I'd like to say. All of them which I wish to share with all of you since everyone deserves the truth. So, here it is. Athrun and I…we _do_ love each other. We were and _ar_e involved romantically. And that love we shared resulted into a child- my child, _our_ child, Carina Ashlyn."

With this revelation, everybody gasped.

"But before you make any conclusions, I'd like to explain many things first- especially my own opinion and perspective on this whole matter.

Cagalli glanced at Athrun who only nodded approvingly.

"During the first war, I was the commander of the Orb Forces. But before that happened, I went through many things, all from which I had learned a lot from. At the beginning, I admit, I hated ZAFT. But my point of view changed when I first met Athrun Zala in the most unlikely of places…we exchanged experiences that time and even though we were on opposing sides, we ended up as friends. And maybe that's when I realized that the Coordinators weren't as bad as they sounded and they were, just like naturals, humans as well. When my father destroyed the mass driver, the Three Ships Alliance formed. Athrun, at that time, chose to fight with us along with Lacus Clyne and Kira Yamato with me commanding the Kusanagi. Athrun and I became closer during that time, as well as Kira Yamato and his eventual wife, Chairwoman Yamato. Little did I know that as time passed by, I was slowly falling for him. We confessed to each other and protected one another during the last battle. After the death of Patrick Zala and the destruction of GENESIS, the Bloody Valentine War ended.

"For two years, I had matured in a lot of ways and had taken on my father's role but not without the help of my friends. Athrun stayed as my bodyguard and it was he that helped me the most when it came to doing my duties properly. He was there when I needed advice, support and encouragement and I couldn't thank him more than enough.

"I was having an appointment with Chairman Durandal when the Armory 1 incident happened. Athrun, who accompanied me, and I ended up in the Minerva and when they found out that the remains of Junius 7 were going to collide with Earth, they had sent soldiers to break it into pieces to lessen the catastrophe it will cause. They had tried their best but unfortunately, they weren't able to save everyone from this terrible incident. I won't deny that it was in fact coordinators who dropped Junius 7 but it was because of this, which was very much related to the first war that instigated the second war. We had pit fire with fire. But that doesn't put the fire out. The only thing it will ever result to is more fire and that's even worse.

* * *

Lacus Clyne-Yamato, along with the Supreme Council and Kira behind her, watched in a big screen Cagalli's speech.

She had rested her chin on both her clasped hands and smiled to herself, letting Cagalli's words sink in. She stole a glance at Kira who smiled at her, nodding his head.

* * *

"I admit, I had made many mistakes and irrational decisions during the second war. And I'm very much happy to have corrected most of them and gained my country's trust and confidence in my abilities once again. Though I had solved that side of my life, I wasn't able to fill the other part of myself. My personal life was in tatters in the duration of the second war. I have hurt not only Athrun but many of my friends as well, troubling them with my burdens and I'm more than thankful to have such friends that will stand by me and help me. Though Athrun and I were on the same side once again, we were never able to solve the problems we were facing that time. It was then that we thought that maybe a coordinator and a natural together will never work out. And so, we broke up.

Everyone was silent as Cagalli paused for a while. Her eyes were getting misty from the many painful memories flooding in her.

"Neither of us knew that we had conceived a child. And when I found out, I already knew what I should do- I have to protect my child. Is that not what a mother does, no matter what age or what status in life she is in?

"I gave birth to my daughter in secret and I have hidden her for two years, with the intention of protecting her. I know full well that my child is hard to accept, being half-natural and half-coordinator. But I ask you, does this child deserve such fate? She is innocent and so are the rest of the children.

Shinn stood up from the couch he was sitting on, having heard enough of Cagalli's speech.

"Shinn? Where are you going?" Luna asked when she saw him heading for the door.

"I just need to do something," Shinn smiled at her. "Don't worry, I won't do anything stupid…just something that would satisfy me."

Luna wasn't convinced but when she saw the look on his face, she immediately understood and nodded her head.

Caridad came to the room holding a tray of cookies. "Where did Shinn go?"

Myrna smiled when Luna answered, "He went to do something that would finally make himself be at peace."

"Coordinators and naturals are both humans. Yes, the coordinators are genetically altered but does that change the fact that we are the same? That we are people? Of course not. It took me a while to realize this and I ask of you to do the same. I know it is hard to accept after going through two wars but maybe it _is_ time for change."

Everyone, not only in Orb muttered between themselves. At her words, everyone became doubtful of everything…of this world, of each other and even of themselves.

Shinn ran through the crowds, slipping through people, trying to get to the front of the podium.

* * *

"There are lots of things we don't understand. And the past two wars are two of those things…But we should always remember that hope and faith are never far away and that there will always be a time for change. These two wars were only misunderstandings, misunderstandings that cost many lives, but still. It was a time when we all misunderstood each other and then hated and even envied each other for it. But with help, we'll be able to stand back up again and that's the important thing. "

Everyone remained quiet. Could it be that the representative was right?

Was it _really_ a time for change?

* * *

Shinn panted when he reached the podium. He was just below Cagalli then.

* * *

Lacus closed her eyes and smiled. Yzak and Dearkka too.

The councilors there were shocked beyond belief and the words of the twenty year old went through their heads.

* * *

Milly and Shiho almost cried as they looked at Carina, staring at the television, her mother's words sinking into her heart.

* * *

Meyrin looked up at the big screen and smiled. Cagalli's words…all of them were true.

_Let's hope,_ Meyrin thought. _Let's hope everyone shares the same feeling.

* * *

_

Luna, Myrna and Caridad looked at each other and then smiled as well.

It _is_ time for change.

* * *

Cagalli glanced at the other representatives who looked as if they were ashamed of themselves. She looked at Athrun, Kisaka and Erica who only nodded their heads in approval.

"And so now, I, Cagalli Yula Athha, stand here in front of all of you, not only asking to accept my relationship with Athrun Zala or to accept our daughter, but to also accept…to _finally_ accept one other. To accept our differences and also our similarities. I ask all of you to release all your anger towards each other and your desire for vengeance. When one guy takes a life for vengeance and someone takes revenge by taking his life, how is that kind of twisted thinking ever going to give us peace? Revenge won't help anything or anyone. I know that acceptance will take a long time but it wouldn't hurt to start now. Forgiveness is no easy task, I know, but it is possible. We just need to believe," Cagalli looked up and smiled. "After all, this is _our _world. Thank you."

With that, Cagalli ended her speech. She stepped down from the podium and headed towards Athrun. Everone was quiet, no matter who they are. All of the representatives and councilors weren't able to say anything. Even the media remained still.

This is _our_ world, is it not?

And then, a clap was heard amidst the silence.

Shinn.

Cagalli's head snapped up and looked at Shinn who clapped his hands, smiling at her.

_It is time for forgiveness_, he told her his unspoken message.

_Yes,_ she answers back, tears forming in her eyes. _Thank you_.

It was like a chain reaction then. From the sound Shinn was emitting, a reporter then followed suit. He clapped his hands and Cagalli glanced at him gratefully. And soon, a representative stood up from his seat and started applauding as well.

* * *

Lacus stood up from her seat and started to clap with Yzak and Dearkka, as well as Kira, doing the same thing.

* * *

Meyrin felt the claps and applause as if they were music to her ears. She closed her eyes. Everyone around her was smiling and clapping. She could even hear people shouting, 'It's time for change!' and 'This is our world!'

* * *

Milly went outside to hear everyone's cheers and applause. Shiho clapped her hands, tears flowing down her cheeks. And Carina was also clapping happily.

* * *

Cagalli couldn't help but feel so happy with the sounds she was hearing. They were all clapping, all of them, one by one, they started to applaud her for her speech.

She was so happy. Does this mean everyone will start to change?

Maybe not everyone…_yet_.

But this is the start of a new beginning, isn't it?

Cagalli smiled and she cried, her tears evident as they flowed down her cheeks. Athrun wrapped an arm around Cagalli's shoulder and they hugged.

It was all too good to be true.

Kisaka and Erica, as well as all the representatives and the soldiers present were clapping.

Yes, this was it.

Everyone won't change in just a snap of the finger, Cagalli knows that. But this…this was the start of something new.

Finally, we leave behind all our anger and resentment. And what we see now is a beautifully paved road- a new beginning. Not just for Cagalli and Athrun, not just for Kira and Lacus, not just for Dearkka and Milly, not just for Yzak and Shiho, not just for Meyrin, Shinn or Luna, not even just for Carina.

But for all of us.

Yes, this was the start of a new beginning _for all of us_.

* * *

**I actually wrote Cagalli's speech! I'm so happy...truth be told, I'm not sure how I scored in this chapter. But, nevertheless, I hope you all liked her statement. It's kind of long, I know but I thought that since people needed a smack on their heads, I made Cagalli repeat all her father's teachings, some in her own words.**

**This chapter might as well be the last and it is, actually. But I want to put an epilogue still and so I hope you'll all look forward to it! **

**Hope you guys liked this chapter as a whole and please review!**


	24. Author's Notes

**Lost Love **

* * *

**Author's Notes**

_**Before I end this fanfiction with the epilogue, I want to impart a few words to all of you first. I know that you guys may be bummed that this isn't the epilogue but I hope that you'll read this!**_

_**First off, I want to thank you guys. You can't imagine how thankful I am to you readers, especially to those who reviewed and criticized my writing. And I'm pretty grateful for your support and 'please update' comments because it's like a voice speaking in my head every second. You see, I've never finished a long multi-chapter story in my tries of writing one and a friend of mine always joked at how I could never finish whatever story I started, so of course, this fic became a stepping stone and a great achievement for me and my development as a writer. So, thank you.**_

_**Second, I never really expected that Lost Love would end like this. My first draft of this story had a far from happy ending but I'm very much pleased that Lost Love became like this and I've got who else but all of you to thank. Because of your suggestions and criticisms, Lost Love is what it is now. I'm sure there's room for more improvement but as of now, I'm very satisfied with it.**_

_**I know that some characters are a bit out of character and that's a bit of a downer but I thought that with changes present especially Cagalli's, having a child and all, people are bound to change, personality-wise.**_

_**The reason I'm writing this to all of you is because I want a clean ending. I don't want to write any 'Please review' stuff at the end or 'Hope you all like it' and that's why I'm telling you all of this now. I'll be posting the epilogue in three days' time at most and of course as always, I hope you all are satisfied with it and if not, well, you're more than welcome to think of a better ending.**_

_**Lastly, I apologize if ever I had offended or insulted anybody in the duration of this story or even whatever I had written above. I had no intention to do so and whatever I have said is merely my own opinion and my interpretation of the relationship that gives all of us an unsettling heart. I'm sure all of you have your own opinions and interpretations and I respect them all just as much as I respect my own.**_

_**Once again, thank you to all of you.**_

_**Sincerely yours,**_

_**AlySimmons**_


	25. Epilogue

**Lost Love **

* * *

**Epilogue**

_25 years later_

I don't know what's going on.

Ok, so I _do_ know what's going on. I just don't know why the maids and my best friends are running around in my house, or at least what will be my former house in a few hours.

"Carina Ashlyn Zala!" Delilah Mae Elseman screeches at me. "What do you think you're doing, sitting around?"

"What, I can't sit around in my own house?" I arch an eyebrow.

"Look at you! You're not even dressed up yet!" She says, ignoring my comment. "Your hair's not done! You're in a bathrobe…you look preposterously frivolous!"

"Calm down, Del," I roll my eyes. "It's not as if it's the end of the world."

"Oh, come on!" Delilah waves her arms around in her lavender gown- complete with the corset, full skirt and everything. "We're already behind schedule, you're not helping one bit and the guests will think you're not going to go through with this!"

"Del," a new voice speaks up. "It's alright. Give Carina some time; it _is_ her big day, after all."

"Not you too, Kayley!" Delilah wails and I laugh at my friend's reaction to my cousin's statement who is also in a lavender gown.

"Yeah, Del, you're always talking about being 'fashionably late', right?" I clasp my hands. "Aren't we doing just that?"

"Well, yes, but this is different!" She tells me, exasperated. "For Pete's sake, just get ready, won't you?""

"I don't get why you're fretting about this," Samantha Joule, preferably Sam, says. "I mean, I'm all for this happy occasion but you're stressing yourself way too much, and you're not even the protagonist in this story."

"See there," I point to Sam- the youngest among the four of us. "That's why all the men kneel down to you when you walk by."

"Shut it!" Sam says, laughing.

"Carina, _come on_." Delilah demanded.

"Ok, ok, I'll go." I sighed and gave in to her request.

"Great," Delilah says.

"Ooh, I'll do the hair!" Kayley Yamato volunteered.

* * *

After 45 minutes, I am now in a Vera Wang gown, Jimmy Choo shoes and Gucci accessories- or so I'm told, with full make-up on. I also have a Chanel handbag lying at the couch which I had no idea why I would even need such a thing on this day. I never saw the others carrying handbags, or did they?

Then three men come into the room- Adrian Zala, my beloved brother, Lance Yamato, my amusing cousin and Yale Joule, the mature older brother of Sam.

"Wow, Sis, you look absolutely breathtaking," Adrian, who is now in his last year in college, approaches me.

"Thanks, Adrian, he'll like it, right?" I look at myself in the mirror consciously. Not that I always look like a fashion disaster; in truth, I never looked like one, but of course, I want to look my very best for _him_.

"He'll be blown away, believe me," Adrian grins.

"Congratulations," Lance gives me a bear hug. "We'll miss you."

"Yeah, I know."

Then Delilah comes in from the walk-in closet, scans the room and ran towards Yale.

"Ugh," Sam rolls her eyes and turns away from the lovey dovey moment of Delilah and Yale. Yup, they're a couple. Actually, I think they're planning to marry sooner or later…but whatever. It's their life and I can only be happy with their relationship at most.

Relationships.

Truth be told, my own love life isn't so complicated, unlike my parents'. I'm sure you all know their story already. After all, being the daughter of one of the two most important people in Orb, not to mention the world and history of mankind, the people, more or less, knows what happened to them in _their_ love life.

I didn't get the story from them. No, I got the whole truth from Aunt Miriallia, Delilah's mom.

I know about the part of the tearful reconciliation. Of course, I was there when it happened. Ok, maybe not exactly at that specific place where they get all sweet and loving…you guys get the point. But the part of how they even _needed_ to reconcile? Yeah, that's where Aunt Milly came in. She told me the whole story…from the amusing and unique first meeting to the friendship made to the problems they encountered during the first war to the point when they realized their love for each other to the second war, the Junius 7 incident and my mom's arranged marriage to the time my dad gave mom her ring and to the time when the second war ended and my dad went to the PLANTs, not knowing that I had been conceived.

That was another thing- my conception.

It triggered a lot of media. And I mean, _a lot_.

They called me a bastard- no pun intended on that. When I went to school, a lot looked down on me despite being their country's leader's daughter. I didn't have many friends aside from my aunts and uncles' children. But I couldn't care any less. So what if my parents weren't married that time? All I cared about was that I was made out of their love and not because of some kind of fling or 'accident' or a one night stand. I know it's wrong…to have a child out of wedlock. That had been implanted on the minds of children since they were two? Well, that's from my experience at least. But the fact that I'm an actual 'bastard' does not deteriorate me. My parents love me just as much as they love my brother.

And to me, that's all that matters.

I can see Dad standing at the foot of the stairs in all his blue haired glory. Mom is there next to him, her arm around his, clad in a green gown with her hair tied up in a bun. Yeah, Mom let her hair grow. _Finally_, according to Aunt Milly and Aunt Lacus.

"Oh, look at you, Darling!" Mom clasps her hands. P.S. I heard she wasn't always like that…the part where she's all sweet and lovely. "You look absolutely gorgeous!"

"Mom," I say, embarrassed. "Stop it."

"Oh, I just can't help it!" Mom tells me.

"She's right, you know," Dad approaches me. "You look beautiful, Sweetheart."

"Thanks Dad, thanks Mom," I hug them both.

"What, _we_ don't get a hug?" I hear Uncle Dearkka's voice, joking as ever.

"At the reception, Uncle Dearkka," I grin at him.

"You're very pretty today, Carina," Aunt Milly tells me, brushing a stray hair from my face.

"You're saying she's not pretty every other day?" Uncle Dearkka raises an eyebrow.

"Of course not! You know what I mean!" Aunt Milly says defiantly.

"You two are the same as always," Uncle Yzak says disapprovingly and I see Aunt Shiho shaking her head and walking towards me.

"God, it's like Cagalli's wedding all over again!" She says.

"Well, except right now," Uncle Kira cuts in. "The bride isn't panicking."

"Hey!" Mom exclaims. "I _wasn't_ panicking!"

"Sure you were," Uncle Kira replies. "You were like pacing in the room for God knows how long!"

"Oh, don't tease her, Kira!" Aunt Lacus says, giggling and everyone laughs.

Delilah, Kayley and Sam walk into the room while the three men follow them from behind. It is a lovely sight, one I'll never forget, and probably the last one where it was just us, my aunts and uncles, cousins and friends, and of course, my brother, Mom and Dad. And that's because another character will be joining the family in two hours' time.

I wanted a simple garden wedding and that's what I have. Only family and close friends are invited. The media is definitely _not _notified of this occasion and I'm really thankful for that.

I was, am not and will never be a fan of media and television. I mean, seriously, invading a person's privacy? Hello? You guys are just sinking so low.

Mom and the others take their place at the front while Dad, Kayley, Delilah, Sam and I prepare for our entrance. Dad stands by my side and I cling on to him closely.

I can still remember my first date. Dad stated he was, at that time, 'calm, cool and collected' but Mom told me otherwise. I can understand though. Dads are supposed to be protective and if the regular Dad is scary enough, think of how brave my dates were, facing the great Athrun Zala, legendary pilot and war veteran, not to mention he has the authority to shoot anyone in the head and kill you with the Infinite Justice considering he's the commander of the Orb Forces.

I wasn't embarrassed by my Father's actions…ok, maybe a bit but I know that he's only looking out for me. After all, he _did_ miss out my first two years.

I look at the guests present and the first one I see is Uncle Kira who is talking to a fellow guest. I smile. Eight years ago, Kayley came crying to me when she told me what Uncle did when _she_ had her first date. It was actually amusing.

Not only did he threaten the boy, Mom also told me that he _cried_?

I know, hard to believe, right? But, I always hear talks about how Uncle Kira had always been a crybaby since like forever. So maybe, it wasn't _that_ hard to believe after all.

The music starts and the flower girl, my groom's niece starts walking, followed by Sam.

I glance up at my Dad and he smiles at me warmly. My hold on him tightens as the occasion sinks in.

I'm getting married.

_I'm getting married._

So, it's true. Brides _really_ do get cold feet, a friend of mine once told me.

"Are you ready, Sweetie?" Dad leans in and whispers.

But of course, cold feet only lasts for I don't know, a second? Well, at least, in my case, that is.

"You know I am," I answer and we start walking down the aisle as the guests stand up, the pianist playing Pachelbel's Canon. I look around. I see my groom's parents, Alice and Dion Martin. They're good people, actually and it seems like Dion Martin was a soldier back then. Mom recognized his name from the papers. The Martins aren't stinking rich. They're just average, hard-working people. And I'm so lucky to have met their son.

I glance at the other side where my colleagues are present. That's another thing to be thankful for- my job. I love being a personal shopper. It's not because I'm addicted to shopping, no, actually, I'm not even addicted to it. I just shop on a mediocre scale. The reason of me being a shopper is because I love to create, not because I love to shop or I'm a fashionista. Usually, people would go for animating or painting canvas but, I feel that the rate of being a famous artist like da Vinci is pretty low and as for animating, well, computers? Not my type.

That's Adrian's field, to be honest. As I pass the guys, I suddenly remembered the time when Mom and Dad argued about Adrian's future. My brother said he wanted to be in the military, which Mom said no to while Dad said yes.

I was quite surprised. I've always thought Dad would be the one to say no. But, I soon realized that Dad knew Adrian was old enough to decide for himself and if that's the path he wants to take, who's he to stop him?

Mom, on the other hand, did not agree with his choice. She stated many times how dangerous and risky it would be and I can't help but feel amused with the situation. I wonder how Mom would react if I said _I'd_ like to join the military. Would she go ballistic?

It's not that Mom and Dad play favoritism. No, Adrian and I never even considered that. Adrian and I are different and the way they show their love for us would also be different, whether it's tough love or the tender and loving kind.

The matter was finally settled when Mom decided that Adrian was, after all, ready.

And me? Well, I love Adrian and I'm very confident in him. If taking the military path would make him happy, I have no right to object. I'd just play the role of the supporting and loving sister.

I also smile at Aunt Meyrin, her husband, Aunt Luna and Uncle Shinn (who got married years ago). Though we don't meet with them often, I was firm in my decision to invite them. After all, if it wasn't for them, I wouldn't be here right now, having this kind of happy life.

I can spot Uncle Andrew, Uncle Mwu, Aunt Murrue and their son, James. The memories we had and will have together are surely precious _and_ humorous, might I add.

Aunt Myrna, Grandma Caridad, Aunt Erica and Uncle Kisaka are also present. Aunt Myrna went into retirement but still visits us quite frequently. Grandma Caridad has two houses, one in Orb and another in Aprilius, near Aunt Lacus and Uncle Kira's home since she says Uncle Kira doesn't visit her very often. Oh, and I finally understood why Mom calls Grandma 'Aunt' when Uncle Kira calls her 'Mom' even though Mom and Uncle Kira are twins. I never knew things were _that_ complicated during the duration of the two wars. Aunt Erica still works in the military and Uncle Kisaka as well, is still serving his country.

I've got nothing else to say to Uncle Kira, Aunt Lacus, Uncle Yzak, Aunt Shiho, Uncle Dearkka and Aunt Milly except 'thank you'. They'd been a large part of my life. I wouldn't be the me now if it hadn't been for their influences. Even Uncle Yzak, who, until now, shares a friendly rivalry with Dad.

Aunt Lacus stayed the chairwoman of PLANT with Uncle Kira as the head of her protection squad. She had put Uncle Shinn as Supreme Commander of ZAFT with Aunt Luna and Aunt Shiho when Dad retired from the position. Uncle Yzak and Uncle Dearkka stayed as council members, marrying Aunt Shiho and Aunt Milly respectively. Kayley, at the moment is staying with me since we both work as personal shoppers. Lance, Kayley's twin, being a soldier as well, graduated as a ZAFT red and worked under Uncle Shinn's command. Delilah is jumping from the PLANT to Earth all the time with Yale since he's having business meetings all the time and has to go to and fro from PLANT to Earth. Sam is still studying in university up on PLANT.

And finally, I see my Mom all teary-eyed.

Mom and Dad. Well, what can I say? _A lot_, if you ask me. I've got a rather complicated past and though my parents were technically the cause of that, it's not as if they hadn't been there for me. Sure, I hadn't known my Dad until I was two but he made up for it, didn't he?

Mom and Dad got married when I was three and two years later, Adrian was born. But it wasn't a 'happily ever after' ending.

What would you expect? This is reality where there are never any 'happily ever afters', just 'happy endings'. Mom and Dad fight a lot but I had never been less than confident that they will make up.

Nobody has a 'happily ever after' ending…not even Uncle Kira and Aunt Lacus, since they were dubbed as the 'perfect couple' because basically, it doesn't exist. It's only alive in fairytales and truthfully, I'd rather it stay that way.

It'd be pretty boring if we just stayed 'happy' all the time, right? What's the excitement in that? Life's supposed to be exciting. There has to be sad and angry moments, times when we are filled with angst, resentment, depression and regret because, as weird as it may sound, it's those times that make life exciting and worth living. And it's those times which we learn from.

Nobody's perfect. I know I'm not. My parents aren't. Uncle Kira and Aunt Lacus aren't. Adrian isn't. Neither are Kayley, Delilah and Sam. Well, the point is, nobody is and nobody will ever be.

And that's why, there is no such thing as a 'happily ever after'. I know I won't get one.

I reach my groom and Dad kisses my forehead.

"I love you, Daddy," I say and he smiles back.

"Me too," And he hands me to the man standing before us. I take his hand and he grasps it tightly.

I love weddings, maybe not as much as Delilah or Kayley but I _do_ love them. Marriage is commitment and there is nothing else more beautiful than committing yourself to the one you love and that's what I'm doing.

"…The rings, please?" Reverend Malchio called. Kayley gives me a ring while I see my future husband taking his ring from the Best Man.

"Do you, Cole Martin, take Carina Ashlyn Zala to be your lawfully wedded wife, in good times and in bad times, in sickness and in health, and to promise her your love and be forever faithful to her and only her, till death do you part?"

_Maybe, even then_, I add in my mind.

"I do," he says in a clear voice, a voice that I fell in love with. He takes my hand gently and slips on the ring, his coral blue eyes never taking off of mine.

"Do you, Carina Ashlyn Zala, take Cole Martin to be your lawfully wedded husband, in good times and in bad times, in sickness and in health, and to promise him your love and be forever faithful to him and only him, till death do you part?"

I pause for a while. I'm not hesitating. I just need a bit time to take it all in and Cole understands that.

He always does.

I look around once more. There may never be a 'happily ever after' and truth be told, I don't know what might happen next or what the future holds but what I do know is that there are a lot of things to be thankful for and just as long as I do my best in the present, then I'll be alright.

My life is like a novel, a rather long one. Everyone else's is too.

And my only hope is that this novel of mine will hold many long chapters full of memories and that, of course, I'll be the writer of my _own_ story.

Yes, I've also heard of the Chairman Durandal issue.

I've already written a lot of chapters and from this day forward, I'd be writing a new one.

I smile at Cole and he smiles back. I finally say in a confident voice, "I do."

Yes, this is going to be one hell of a chapter, I'm sure of it.

**-oOo- **

_**The End**_

**-oOo-**


	26. Lost Love Special: Hidden Moments

**Lost Love Special**

* * *

** Hidden Moments**

Carina heaved a sigh, brushing her blond bangs away from her eyes and tied her hair up in a loose ponytail. She felt the dust irritate her nose and without warning, she sneezed, covering her nose a minute too late.

A tissue was dangling in front of her then and she took it, "Thanks."

"Even when you're sneezing, you look cute," a man said, chuckling, wrapping his arms around Carina's waist.

"Sweet talker," Carina removed his hands from her waist and threw the used tissue into the trash bin.

"But it's true," the man insisted, walking towards her and using his finger to lift her chin up. "And your eyes…they never fail to mesmerize me."

Carina laughed at that, "Cole, dear, I think the only reason you're mesmerized with my eyes is because I inherited that trait from my father."

"And your point being?"

"You're mesmerized because when you asked my father to give you my hand in marriage, he cocked a gun and pointed it straight at you. I'd say you were mesmerized by that, alright," Carina smirked at her fiancé who crossed his arms and glared at her.

"That wasn't a mesmerizing sight at all," Cole scoffed. "I was almost pissing my pants back there! That was pure and utter fear. See, unlike certain people, I do _not_ live in a house filled with guns and other very dangerous weaponry whose family members and staff are authorized to use at any moment they see fit. And it's not every day that I have a gun which safety was turned off, mind you, put between my eyes."

"Like I said," Carina moved her hand. "Mesmerizing."

"_Carina_."

"What?" Carina moved closer to Cole. "Oh come on, you should've asked Mom instead."

"You're kidding me, right?" Cole arched an eyebrow. "Chief Representative Athha is _so_ much scarier than Admiral Zala."

"Fine," Carina shrugged. "Adrian would've been a better choice."

"Um, honey," Cole said, his tone dripping with sarcasm. "Are you _trying_ to have me killed?"

Carina laughed, "Of course not, Sweetie. I would never dream to do such a thing."

"What did I get myself into?" she heard him mutter. She then snapped her head towards him, glaring at him. She raised her left hand which was adorned with a nice and simple 2-carat princess cut diamond ring. "Do you want to take this back, honey? Because I won't mind."

"Hey, you know I didn't mean it that way," Cole tried to wrap her in his arms but she ignored him. "Come on, you've got to cut me some slack. I mean, it's just something hard to get used to."

"Look, I've got enough discrimination to last three lifetimes. I don't need any more from you," Carina stated.

"I wasn't discriminating you."

"You just said yourself that you're going to be miserable because of my family!"

"I never said that. I just said it was hard to get used to."

"_Sure_, it meant that way."

"Carina…" Cole sighed.

When Carina still refused to face him, Cole sighed again, "I'm sorry, ok? Please don't be mad at me. Look, I'm going downstairs and wrap up your other boxes. I'll come back, alright?"

Carina huffed, "Really…idiot."

Carina knelt on the floor and examined a chest nearby. Rubbing the dust off of it, she coughed and sneezed a little, muttering something about allergies acting up. She opened the chest and saw notebooks and albums which were most probably five years old already. She took out the album and flipped the pages gingerly.

A smile forced its way onto her face as she reminisced. There was one photo where her mother, the esteemed Chief Representative Cagalli Yula Athha, held her as a newborn baby. She was wrapped in a blanket and gathered in her mother's arms. Her mother was smiling, tears evidently flowing on her face but she wasn't looking at the camera but at her daughter – Carina. (1)

She was only an infant playing with random toys while Grandma Caridad and Aunt Myrna were in the background, kneeling behind the young Carina in the picture beside the first one.

She looked at the next picture which was of her and her aunts. Carina was in the middle, age two and her Aunts Lacus, Milly and Shiho all surrounded her. If memory served right, that was around the time of her father and Aunt Meyrin's engagement.

Another picture was of her, almost three, in her father, Admiral Zala's arms. She was wearing a sundress and her hands were pressed firmly against her father's chest. There was a serene smile on his face as he looked at the camera.

The following picture showcased a four year old Carina and a two year old Kayley Yamato dressed in a flower girl get-up. They were both holding little baskets with green and white ribbons dangling from the sides. Carina could easily recognize the setting as her parents' wedding.

In the next one, both her parents were present in the photograph with her in the middle. Her mother looked simply radiant in her wedding dress and her father was especially handsome in his suit. Carina was smiling widely, comfortable in her father's embrace with her tiny basket hanging from her arms carelessly.

Carina grinned to herself as she saw her younger self touching her mother's bulging belly in the next picture. That was Adrian inside.

These pictures were frozen moments in time, frozen moments of _her_ life. She browsed the other pages and she could feel herself getting misty-eyed.

She and Adrian were playing in the garden.

Her family went on a picnic with Uncle Kira's family.

Her father dressing up as Santa Claus on Christmas Eve with her and Adrian dangling from his arms. Cagalli took this picture.

Carina's first trip to the PLANT Council in Aprillius.

Carina and her brother swimming in the beach.

A stolen picture of her mother and father kissing with Adrian in the background making a funny face. This was probably taken by Carina herself, given how the taking of the picture was done rather clumsily.

Carina and her cousins, along with her aunts and uncles' children building sandcastles together.

A family picture where Carina and Adrian were obviously still in elementary.

Carina's first day in high school. (That day was a bit tragic though…)

Carina with Uncle Kisaka and Aunt Erika. She was holding a gun in that photo, a real one, by the way.

Carina and Adrian's visit to the hangar where the Infinite Justice and the Akatsuki rested.

Carina and her friends (Kayley Yamato, Delilah Elseman and Sam Joule) posing as teenagers.

Carina blushing furiously as her first date nervously picked her up.

Adrian taking Carina to the Prom. (Nobody dared to ask her after that nerve-wrecking date the first boy who ever asked her out had.)

Carina graduating high school with top honors.

Carina smiling, a bit embarrassed, in her gown for her own eighteenth birthday.

Adrian smirking and Carina pouting. Note: this was the moment where Carina realized that her growth spurt has ended and Adrian was starting to tower over her.

All her aunts and uncles along with their respective children and her own family posing for a Christmas picture.

Carina and Cole's first date.

Carina and Cole's first kiss which Adrian took. He paid dearly for it later on.

Carina and her colleagues beaming at the camera.

Carina and her group of friends (Adrian Zala, Kayley Yamato, Lance Yamato, Delilah Elseman, Yale Joule and Sam Joule) having a vacation on their own.

And lastly, another family portrait. Her mother was sitting on a chair in her usual green gown. A few lines were seen on her otherwise flawless face. Her smile was sincere and her mere presence emitted a sense of pride and dignity. Her father in a suit stood behind her mother, a hand on her shoulder and another hand clasping onto her mother's hand which was raised to meet his. Like Cagalli, Athrun's expression was proud and yet very much sincere. Carina in her flowing blue gown was seated at the foot of her mother. Adrian in his semi-formal suit leaned against the arm of the chair Cagalli had been sitting on, grinning.

Carina then closed the album and put it beside her, making a mental note to pack it with her. Her attention then focused to the stack of books on her other side. She lifted one curiously and snapped her fingers in realization, "This must be…"

Her hunch had been right. The pink hard bound book with the gold trimmings and heart shaped lock stood out in her memory as being her very first diary that Aunt Milly and Aunt Shiho bought for her to keep her busy while they took care of some paperwork or some other business that Carina wasn't able to comprehend at that time.

It was the time when her mother and Uncle Athrun, who turned out to be her real father, appeared on television with her mother giving some sort of speech. At that time, Carina wasn't able to make out most of it, only understanding a few bits and pieces.

Carina opened the diary, smiling fondly at the clumsy scrawl on the first page which read, 'Carina's Diary'. She turned to the next page.

_6__th__ of May, C.E. 75_

_Dear Diary,_

_ Aunt Milly and Aunt Shiho gave you to me today. They said it was a present. I'm staying in PLANT right now. I miss my mommy. I saw her on TV a few days ago with Uncle Athrun giving a speech. I didn't understand a lot of it._

_ I really wish mommy would come here and get me already. I love staying with Aunt Milly and Aunt Shiho but I love staying with mommy the best. And Grandma Caridad and Aunt Myrna. I want to go home. _

_ They said mommy would come very soon. I really hope so. _

_ Goodnight._

_ Carina_

_9__th__ of May, C.E. 75_

_Dear Diary,_

_ Mommy finally came to get me! I'm so happy! _

_ But Mommy said something really weird today. Mommy said that Mommy was my real mommy and not just my love love mommy. Mommy also said that I was going to meet with my real daddy very soon. _

_ But now, I'm sleeping with Grandma Caridad back in Orb. Grandma said that Mommy was very busy so she cannot kiss me goodnight. Mommy looked very tired a lot. I wish that Mommy is ok. I don't want Mommy to be sick._

_ Goodnight._

_ Carina_

_15__th__ of May, C.E. 75_

_Dear Diary,_

_ I have a Daddy now! Mommy said it is Uncle Athrun. Uncle Athrun is my Daddy. Mommy said that because Mommy and Uncle Athrun or Daddy love the other, I am the baby! I love Mommy and I believe Mommy so Uncle Athrun will be my new Daddy now. Mommy said so. So it is real. Uncle Athrun is very nice too. Uncle Athrun gave me a new toy when Mommy, Uncle Athrun and me went to the amusi park. I'm happy that Uncle Athrun is my new Daddy. _

_ Goodnight._

_ Carina_

Carina bit her lip, slowly closing the book. She remembered quite vividly those moments in her childhood. It was really surprising for her to know that her 'Uncle Athrun' was her real father. Honestly, it took her a very long time to get used to it, to get used to calling Uncle Athrun Daddy or Dad or Father.

He had told her that it was okay but Carina could see the pain in his eyes. Back then, she just wondered why he was sad but now, being able to understand fully the circumstances, she knew quite well why there was pain behind his smile.

It took her almost half a year to be able to call him her father without slipping once. It had been a happy few weeks for everyone. Her father proposed to her mom (again), with the same ring, and soon after that, every adult female she knew dove into the wedding plans with the exception of, ironically, her mother, who was actually the bride. Before Carina knew it, the whole house was filled with flowers and banners and papers filled with plans and diagrams for the wedding.

Two weeks later, a new home was shown to Carina. Her dad had built it, having come across her mom's doodles of her dream house stored in one of the drawers. Her mother was thrilled. And so, they moved into the new house in a couple of days and the old home in the country was instead used as a rest house.

"Hey," a voice chirped from behind Carina.

Carina turned around and let a smile form on her face, noticing the pink hair and purple eyes, "Hey Kayley."

"What are you doing?" Kayley hopped to her side, flopping down beside her, looking at the albums and notebooks that were sprawled over her cousin.

"Reminiscing?" Carina shrugged.

"Ah," Kayley nodded. "So, I saw Cole downstairs. He looked depressed. He wanted to come up here but I told him to stay low…that I'll cool you off. So what exactly _did_ you do to the guy?"

Carina grinned at her mischievously, "Well, I did threaten that I'd call off the wedding. Even offered back my ring."

"You're a little devil inside, aren't you?" Kayley said laughingly.

"Always has been," Carina moved to stack the albums and notebooks on one side. "You know that."

"Need any help?" Kayley offered, looking into the boxes. "Sorry I was late. Your customers were being very whiny today."

"What can I say? They miss me," Carina said smugly, standing up. "They like me more than you."

"That's how you treat me after I just selflessly covered _your _shift?" Kayley arched an eyebrow, crossing her arms. "So that you could focus on moving day?"

Carina blanched, "I take_ every_ rude comment back. I love you Kayley. _So_ much."

"I know," Kayley nodded knowingly, picking up a stack of papers which were tied up and an old lamp. "Now, where should I put these?"

"Um, the lamp put it in there – " Carina pointed to a open box labeled 'Old stuff'. " – and that stack put it over there – " pointed to a box labeled 'School stuff'.

Kayley peered closer to the stack of papers and gave out a grunt, "You keep your old school notes and test papers? _Seriously?"_

"I like to gloat," Carina said simply.

"I'm sure you do," Kayley sniffed, looking pointedly at the top paper which was marked with an 'A+'. "Probably when you have kids, you'll use these to motivate them, huh?"

Carina didn't answer but grinned to herself. Half an hour later, all of the things in the attic that were Carina's were all packed up in boxes. Kayley leaned against a shelf, playing with the roll of duct tape, "Well, that's that."

Carina sighed, tying her hair up into a messy bun, "Yep. Wanna go down and take a break?"

"There's more of your stuff?" Kayley gasped.

"No," Carina shook her head. "Everything's already packed. Cole said that he'd deal the ones in my room…We just need to bring the boxes down. But I plan to let the guys do that…the guys _are_ here, right?"

Kayley nodded, "Lance took over my couch since last night and came with me. Your brother just came home from military academy when I arrived and Yale – well, Delilah will make sure he gets here."

"Oh, alright," Carina said.

"Were you expecting any other guys?" Kayley tilted her head. "Cause I'm pretty sure that Uncle Athrun just came home…"

Carina laughed, "My dad's getting pretty old."

Kayley chuckled, "Kidding…but really, I think he wouldn't be _too_ old for the job."

"Nh," Carina shrugged, climbing down the stairs with Kayley trailing behind her. As they rounded the corner and hopped downstairs, they saw the whole gang in the sitting room. Delilah, a magazine in hand, was chatting with Sam who had a thick novel in her hands instead. Cole, sitting on the smaller couch was talking to Yale who sat beside his girlfriend, Delilah, an arm draped over her shoulders. Adrian and Lance were also joining in the conversation.

"Hey guys!" Kayley greeted, everyone turning to the pair.

Cole immediately stood up and raced to Carina's side, with a pleading look on his face. Carina grinned, "Don't worry, I'm not mad."

Cole smiled and Carina laughed, kissing him fully on the lips. A mixture of groans and coos were heard. Carina then heard Adrian grumble, "Seriously! Just because you're _marrying _the guy…"

Cole's arms wrapped around his fiancée's waist when a stern voice suddenly interrupted their kiss, "There will be no kissing under my roof."

The couple immediately broke off. Carina looked at Athrun skeptically, "Speak for yourself, Dad. It's not as if _you_ don't kiss Mom every chance you get."

Athrun narrowed his eyes, defining the lines on his face further, "Your mother and I have a _very_ different situation."

"Hypocrite," Carina coughed.

"Ugh," a second voice resounded in the room. "Almost thirty years and I still can't get used to the fact that my sister and my best friend are together, and legal to be intimate, might I add."

"Uncle Kira!" Carina exclaimed, moving to hug her uncle who just walked in from the kitchen.

"Hey there," Kira greeted, the faint wrinkles on his face showing themselves. "So, the big day's coming up…_Kayley_…"

Kayley then groaned, recognizing that tone of voice, "No, Dad, I'm _not_ seeing anyone and if I was, I _won't _be bringing him home to meet you. _Not after last time_."

Lance guffawed; Adrian snickered. Yale smirked and the two other girls in the room giggled behind their books. Kira's face blanched, "Why does that make me feel even worse?"

Athrun comfortingly patted his best friend turned brother-in-law on the back. "You'll get used to it."

"Like how I got used to seeing you and Cagalli make out?" Kira retorted.

Adrian made a face, "Aw, _come on_! Uncle Kira, you're making my ears bleed!"

"Oh, speaking of which," Carina faced her father. "Where's Mom? And Aunt Lacus?"

"Well, your mom's still at work," Athrun had a thoughtful expression on his face then he turned to Kira. "And Lacus – "

"Decided to stay with Cagalli and help out," Kira finished.

"Oh yeah, Dad, when did you and Mom arrive in ORB?" Kayley asked.

"Just this morning," Kira shrugged.

"They should be home by – " Athrun started but as if on cue, the door burst open with a blond storming into the house with a pink haired one timidly trailing behind her.

"_Stupid_ old geezers!" Cagalli muttered under her breath, her untidy blond hair tied up in a loose ponytail. She glared at nowhere in particular, the line on her forehead becoming evident. "You'd think they're already dead by time I'm _middle aged_!"

"So, Mom," Adrian drawled, a mocking tone in his voice. "How was work?"

"Don't you dare mess with me, young man!" Cagalli growled.

"Have some champagne, Honey," Athrun walked towards his wife, wrapping an arm around her shoulders, holding out the glass of champagne he was drinking earlier. Cagalli took the glass and gulped down the contents.

"And how was _your_ day, Aunt Lacus?" Adrian channeled his attention towards the smiling lady behind his mom.

Lacus looked the same as always, except for the few lines on her face, "It was…good enough, I suppose. Ah, Carina! How are you? It's been a very long time!"

"Hi Aunt Lacus," Carina gave her aunt a friendly hug. Lacus then turned towards her niece's fiancé.

"And Cole! Oh, how delightful! It's been ages since I've been able to help plan another wedding. Yes, it's been a _very_ long time indeed," Lacus nodded.

"Mom!" Kayley groaned. "One parent wants me to settle down and the other one doesn't even want me dating!"

"Ah," Lance said to Adrian and Yale offhandedly. "The benefits of being a guy – both parents _would_ want you to get married and off."

Cole smiled, a bit stiff, "Good afternoon, Chairwoman Yamato."

"Oh what's that?" Lacus said. "No more formalities, my dear. We are family, after all…well, we're about to become one. Call me Aunt Lacus. It's not as if you call Cagalli and Athrun by their official titles still, right?"

"Hold your horses, Lacus," Cagalli returned to her usual mischievous self. "I don't know about Athrun but I still have him call me 'Chief Representative'. And that wouldn't change for a very long time…I hope you don't mind, Sweetie."

Knowing full well that her mother was addressing her, Carina grinned, "I won't."

Sensing her tone of voice, Cole gulped and turned towards Carina with a look that screamed betrayal who only shrugged, a smile on her face. Delilah then gasped, "Oh, Mom just messaged me! She said that she'd be able to make it to dinner tonight!"

"That's great," Cagalli nodded. "It's been a long time since I've seen both of them."

"Oh no, only Mom's coming," Delilah stated, straightening in her seat. "She kind of…uh…left Dad back in PLANT."

"Pardon?" Kira raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"Well, in her message," Delilah looked back at her phone. "She said that she's coming alone…yadda yadda…Dad can rot in hell….yadda yadda…and she's contemplating on divorcing him…yadda yadda…and she sends her best wishes to the happy couple…"

"Um, divorce?" Cole spoke up shyly when no one seemed affected by the message.

"Oh, I wouldn't think much about it," Delilah waved a hand in dismissal. "Mom's always throwing the word 'divorce' around."

"Yeah," Carina looped her arm around her fiancé's. "Aunt Milly and Uncle Dearkka _love_ to fight but they'll make up at the end of the day. We're gonna have to prepare another setting cause by the looks of it, Uncle Dearkka might be on a shuttle by now and will be joining us for dinner too."

"Yep," Delilah nodded. "I'll keep that on mind."

"So…um," Cole struggled for words. "Councilor Elseman and his wife love to fight…"

"Oh not only them," Yale, who was usually quiet, said in a knowing tone. "Sam and my parents are like that as well."

"Oh, the _screaming_!" Sam moaned dramatically. "My eardrums are already immune to their voices! Yale's lucky he's moved out of the house already."

"Hey, I spent a good, rather loud twenty years with them," Yale pointed out, Delilah cozying up towards him. "If I could sit through their screaming matches that long, you can too."

"One year to go…one year to go…" Sam then chanted to herself and everyone laughed.

"The moving truck's arrived," someone yelled from outside.

"Oh yes!" Carina exclaimed. "We still haven't brought the boxes down!"

As if on cue, everyone below thirty immediately went upstairs to help with the moving. The two older couples then sat down on the couch, the two women snuggling up to their husbands.

"They're all so grown up…" Cagalli sighed.

Athrun rubbed Cagalli's upper arm comfortingly, "They're like us…without the wars."

Kira chuckled, "Yeah."

"At least they're living a peaceful life, right?" Lacus smiled, hugging Kira, her arms wrapped around his waist.

* * *

"You know…" Cole said, hugging Carina as they swayed in the hammock in the garden of the Zala estate. He looked up, gazing at the stars. They just finished dinner and true enough to what Carina said earlier, Dearkka _did_ came running for his wife and before they even started dinner, he and Milly already reconciled. "I wouldn't take back what I said about not getting used to your family."

"Is that so?" Carina sighed, curling up to him.

"Mhmm," Cole nodded. "But…maybe it's better that way…not getting used to it…it's always nice to have an unpredictable life, you know?"

"Yeah, I know," Carina smiled, putting her hand up. In the faint light of the stars and the moon, you could still see the ring glistening on her finger. "So, you won't be taking this back then?"

Cole wrapped a hand over Carina's, whispering in her ear, "I won't ever take it back…I love you too much to do it…"

They shared a look before Cole sealed his lips over hers. Carina wrapped her arms around his neck while he caressed her cheek with his hand.

"I already told you that there will be _no_ kissing under _my_ roof!"

The couple broke apart almost immediately and turned around to see Athrun, an eyebrow raised and an arm wrapped around Cagalli's shoulders and Cagalli, a smile which was bordering a smirk on her face and a hand firmly placed on her husband's chest.

The young couple groaned and Carina laughed silently when Cole grumbled, "I'm just glad that we moved far, _far _away from here…"

* * *

**(1) Imagine the picture of Kira and Cagalli while they were babies in Via Hibiki's arms...except that there's only one baby.**

**I didn't know what compelled me to write this but I did and it felt great. Oh, I didn't describe the other children anymore. You guys can just imagine how they look like. I'm too lazy to think about that. Haha.**

**I hope I got their personalities spot on. For Cagalli, Athrun, Kira and Lacus anyway. Even Milly, Dearkka, Shiho and Yzak. I might have exaggerated a little but hey, that's probably what age does to a person. XD**

**Anyway, I hope that you all enjoyed this and thanks for reading!**

**Leave me reviews if you guys have the time! Thanks!**


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